


When It Gets Hard

by wolfefanatic



Series: When It Gets Hard [1]
Category: CSI: Miami
Genre: Drama, M/M, Male Pregnancy, Minor Character Death, Mpreg, Sexual Content, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-02
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-19 17:36:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 46,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7371235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolfefanatic/pseuds/wolfefanatic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan Wolfe is in love with his boss, Horatio Caine. But Horatio is in love with someone that he can't have. Will he ever return Ryan's feelings? Also includes: BL, M-Preg, Case Solving, and some drama. I posted this originally on FF.net</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Death

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe some minor spoilers depending on how far you are into the show.

One

Horatio Caine hadn't been himself. He was off; that was the way the others would have described him. But then again, they were all feeling that way. It had been that way since Jesse Cardoza had tragically died. And the lieutenant couldn't help but to feel responsible.

If they had just gotten to Starling and figured things out in time, Jesse would still have been there today.

The lieutenant mentally beat himself up almost every day proceeding the events. He knew that he couldn't have possibly known what Jesse's fate would be. But he still wasn't able to forgive himself. Another member of his team was gone. He had promised to himself and to others to not have let anything to happen to them- to protect them. He would have done anything to help other and protect them, even with his own life. But he couldn't even have done that right.

Horatio Caine hadn't been himself. To others, he put on a stoic façade. He seemed to be holding up pretty well. He still handled cases, worked in the field collecting evidence and he interrogated suspects like the best of them. But his team knew him very well. They knew that he wasn't in as good as a mood that he put on. When Horatio had made the final shot of the game and declared it for Jesse, the others cheered. They were all so grateful to have each other.

Walter, Ryan, Calleigh, Eric and Natalia clapped loudly for him. He couldn't help the small smile that formed on his face. They noticed it. Walter hadn't known Horatio as well as the others. He didn't know that was a smile of sadness. The others did though. They knew their lieutenant. After the game, the team decided to head to the bar. It was rare for Horatio to agree to go out, but he knew that he'd probably needed to cut loose. If only for a night.

After two drinks, Natalia decided to retire back home. She was a bit of a lightweight and was just exhausted from the day's events. So, she called a taxi and left.

Walter was the next to go. He hadn't even had a drink. Sure he'd ordered one, but he spent the night staring at it while listening to Eric and Ryan bicker. He'd give a small grin whenever he heard Calleigh laugh at the pointless argument. But he didn't talk much. Then he declared that he wanted to go home and rest. That was understandable. Horatio even told him to take the day off tomorrow. Frankly, they all could use a few days off but that wasn't possible. But seeing as Walter was the one who was the closest to Jess, Horatio thought it was only right.

It was down to Calleigh, Eric, Ryan and the lieutenant himself. They shared small talk and laughed, but they knew that it was an awkward atmosphere and Horatio's heart just wasn't in it.

"Are you alright, Horatio?" Calleigh spoke. "I know that you and Jesse were pretty close."

Three pairs of eyes were now on the stoic face. Horatio dropped his gaze to his small glass of water for a moment before looking back to her. "I'm fine." And that was that.

Eric and Ryan started throwing back shots like there was no tomorrow. Well, in their line of work that was always possible. But they were having a contest; who could drink more without being drunk. Of course Calleigh and Horatio didn't condone their little game. They spoke amongst each other while the other two made asses out of themselves.

Calleigh was in the middle of telling a story about Jesse when Eric started placing wet, sloppy kisses on her cheek. She struggled to hide her smile and tried to continue it on. "Yeah, he was always helping. Jesse was sweet; a great guy… so nice… Eric, what are you doing?"

Eric stopped and smiled sheepishly. "You look so nice, Calleigh."

"You're drunk." She stated.

Ryan's arms shot in the air in victory. "That means I win." He declared. "In your face, Delko."

Horatio watched the interaction. "Will you be able to handle Eric?" He asked Calleigh. She nodded as she took the shot glass out of his hand. "Yeah, we'll be fine. Come on, Eric; let's get you home." They both stood, she put his arm around her shoulder and Eric leaned against her small body. "Goodnight Horatio. See you, Ryan."

Eric laughed loudly at nothing in particular. "Bye H. I'll beat you next time Wolfe." And they were off. A few people had noticed the exchange and stared at them. But it was a bar and it wasn't the most obnoxious thing they'd witnessed so they went back to minding their own business soon enough. Ryan suddenly slumped and dropped his head on the table. Horatio, surprised by this, was startled. "Mr. Wolfe, are you okay?"

Ryan shook his head. "I feel sick. I'm drunk, H." He stated. Horatio watched Ryan's form. He didn't seem intoxicated just a few moments ago. As if reading his mind, he spoke again. "I'm usually good at hiding it for a while. But man, the room is spinning right now."

"Well, then let's get you home." Horatio was up and he took Ryan by the hand. At first, Ryan was going to protest. He would have been alright and he could just take a taxi home. But he knew that if he even tried to deny Horatio's help, he would have gotten it anyways. So he just gave his thanks and allowed the redhead to guide him back to his car.

Ryan climbed into the passenger seat and sighed. Horatio closed the door and then made his way to the driver's side. Once in, he started the car and they were off for the fifteen minute drive back to Ryan's place. Once parked in the driveway, he turned the vehicle off and turned to face the younger CSI to find that he was already staring at Horatio.

Ryan smiled softly. "Thank you for bringing me home, H."

"It's no problem, Mr. Wolfe. Do you need some help getting inside?"

"Would you mind?"

Horatio opened his door and got out of the vehicle. He opened the door for Ryan and took his hand once again. Ryan started fishing into his own pocket, finding his keys and handing them off to his boss. Horatio guided the younger to the front door. There were five keys on the ring, and after three tries, Horatio finally found the right one. He pushed the door open, guided Ryan inside and ran his hand over the wall, searching for the light switch. Ryan then released his grip on Horatio's hand. In the dark, Horatio couldn't see Ryan reaching out for him, but he felt his hand on his chest. He pushed back gently against the wall. Horatio was met with the feeling of Ryan's body against his own. He froze when he felt Ryan's warm breath against his ear.

Ryan's hand stroked his hair softly. It was brief. The moment his hand left the redheads hair, the lights came on. Horatio looked behind himself to see the light switch just by his head. So that was it, he concluded. Ryan was just searching for the light switch. Of course he didn't mean to touch his hair.

Ryan hummed softly and then smiled. "Are you okay, H?" He questioned. "You're not drunk too, are you?"

"No, I only had water tonight." He answered.

"Well I really appreciate you bringing me home."

Horatio nodded. "I'll pick you up in the morning since we left your car in the parking garage."

Ryan stared into Horatio's deep blue eyes. He just couldn't look away. He couldn't even begin to explain how much he just wanted to lean in and close the distance in between them. But he couldn't; what would the lieutenant say if he had known what was going through Ryan's mind?

Horatio was the first to break eye contact. "Bright and early, Mr. Wolfe." He stated, turning and slipping into the night. Ryan nodded, though he was alone now and Horatio couldn't see him. He closed the door, echoing his words. "Bright and early, H."


	2. Back to Work

Two

They drove in silence. Ryan wanted so desperately for his boss to say something- anything. But he was quiet. Other than the "good morning, Mr. Wolfe" he'd given, Horatio hadn't said anything else to Ryan.

His mind began to race. Did he make a complete ass out of himself last night? He remembered that he and Eric had a competition to see who could drink more alcohol. They were both pretty intoxicated, but he knew he had falsely won. Horatio was nice enough to take him home. He was even great and helped him inside. But the events after that were a fog.

Ryan knew he was nervous about being alone with Horatio. When he was nervous, he did thing that would make uncomfortable. So maybe that was what happened last night. But Horatio Caine was strong and not easily fazed. So whatever Ryan did had to have crossed the line. If only he knew what it was, then he could make it right.

Horatio was curious about Ryan. He'd spent most of the night thinking about the younger man without even realizing it. Why had Ryan looked at him that way last night? Why did he press his own body against Horatio's, and why was he so close that he could feel his breath on his ear? Ryan could have asked him to step aside to get to the light switch, it wasn't a big deal.

But he couldn't help but to think Ryan had ulterior motives. He ran his fingers through his hair last night. Initially, Horatio had thought maybe Ryan was fumbling for the light switch. But after rethinking about the nights events, he thought differently. It was a strange thought, but Horatio was sure Ryan wasn't attracted to him. He knew that some people when drunk, were flirtatious.

Both men exited the car and walked through the garage. Neither of them said anything to each other. When they stepped inside the building, they were met with stares. It probably looked weird for the two to have come into work together. But Ryan felt small. He wanted to turn around and just go back home but he knew that he had a job to do and that just wasn't possible. They went to their lockers and got ready for the day.

Eric entered behind them, grinning from ear to ear. "H, Wolfe, what the hell happened last night?" he asked.

Ryan visibly tensed up. Maybe not noticeable to Eric but Horatio noticed. Ryan didn't say anything; he didn't know what to say. Was Eric referring to them being at the bar? Or maybe it had something to do with why the other employees had stared at them when they came in.

"Well, Eric," Horatio said slowly, "you and Mr. Wolfe agreed to partake in some sort of drinking game; you lost by the way. Calleigh took you home while I tended to Mr. Wolfe."

"If you won, Wolfe, then why did you need help getting home? You cheater." He sneered. Ryan still didn't know what to say. He was relaxed a little bit but he still wasn't sure what to say. Horatio came to his aid again.

"Eric, you know I wouldn't let someone who had just participated in a drinking game drive home. That's just dangerous and irresponsible. Now why are everyone in the lab watching Mr. Wolfe and I?"

Ryan didn't want to know the answer to that. It had to have been bad. Eric had stopped smiling and became quiet for a while. He shook his head "Everyone seems to be talking about Jesse and how well you knew him, H. And you got pretty close with him too, Ryan. Stetler had been visiting us all telling us about counseling services being offered, but Horatio's and Walter's will probably be mandatory."

"Why?" Ryan found his voice and instantly regretted it. Why; what an idiotic question.

"People are upset, Wolfe. And maybe Stetler's right for once- maybe we should talk to a professional. We don't need hostility and a giant cloud of glum in the lab." Eric explained.

Both men looked up to find that Horatio was no longer there. They briefly looked around but figured that Horatio had something that he needed to do.

Horatio sat down at the desk in his office. He put his hands on his face, resting his elbows on the desk. He knew he probably should have stayed home but his team needed him. And now Rick Stetler would probably seek Horatio out to criticize hi whole lab. And he was in no mood to deal with Stetler.

Ryan watched his boss. Poor Horatio, he though, he'd been through so much. And he never even so much as asked for a break or time off. He put everyone else's needs ahead of his own. But that was why he was a great man. Ryan knocked, making Horatio promptly stand up at attention. He didn't mean to let himself get so caught up in his own thoughts that he wasn't aware of his surroundings anymore.

"Uh, H, there's been a home invasion. Head trauma victim downtown. Natalia and Calleigh are already on the way." Ryan told him. Horatio's eyes became stern. "And why am I the last to know about this?" He asked him.

"Frank sent them out. He's heading down there too," Ryan added shyly, "and actually he suggested that we let you have a break today. We all think you deserve it."

"I am more than capable of investigating a crime scene. "

"I know, Horatio. I'm just worried about you- we all are." Ryan said. He just called Horatio by his first name instead of the usual 'H', like Eric. He must have been completely serious and worried about him. Horatio shook his head.

"Thank you, Mr. Wolfe. But I am going to that crime scene."

"Fine, but can I ask you something?" He questioned. "Can we meet up after work again? I would like to talk about last night."

Horatio shook his head. No. That was it. Now Ryan felt foolish for even asking. Of course Horatio didn't want to talk about last night. Maybe Ryan really did do something to offend him or embarrass himself. Horatio couldn't help but to notice Ryan's face falter. The younger smiled quickly and nodded, mumbling about understanding and saying sorry for bothering him.

"I'm having dinner with Kyle tonight." Horatio said. "But maybe we can get together afterwards."

Ryan nodded and agreed before clearing the way to let Horatio out of his office. He watched him as he walked down the hall. Ryan tore his gaze away from his boss's backside and came face-to-face with Stetler.


	3. A Chance to Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dave Benton (Audio/Visual; played by Wes Ramsey) is in this story and he is important

Three

Horatio was the last to arrive at the crime scene. Frank Tripp was the one that decided to keep him in the dark about it. But he didn't only have Horatio's well-being on his mind. He knew that Frank would never do something he didn't think was right or necessary. When his Hummer pulled up, Calleigh and Natalia stalled their actions.

"I knew he wouldn't say behind." Calleigh murmured. Natalia looked around for Frank, knowing that the boss was going to go right for him. She spotted Frank conversing with an officer. When Boa Vista returned her gaze to the lieutenant's Hummer, she saw that he was out of the vehicle, in his sunglasses and headed straight for Frank. Horatio was ready for work.

"Frank."

He turned around, knowing that voice anywhere. The redhead stood there, his head tilted to the left. Frank couldn't tell if he was looking right at him or somewhere else. The sunglasses tint was too dark to tell.

"Horatio what are you doing here?" He asked. "I thought you were back at the lab."

"Because you told Mr. Wolfe to babysit me, Frank. But we'll talk about that later. What's going on here?" Horatio took off his sunglasses and began to look around, observing the scene. Frank dismissed the officer he had been talking to. "Robbery gone wrong. The victim's name is Janice Lee. Her sister came to check on her, said she hadn't heard from her in two days. When she found her, she was dead in the hallway so she called us. The vic has been dead those two days."

Horatio noticed the window to the house was broken. He approached Calleigh, who smiled brightly when he did. "This is the entry point." She announced. "We think the suspect thought no one was home and went in to rob the place. But she must've heard them making noise and went to investigate. He beat her to death wither own cheerleading trophy. Do you think he got panicked and just used the first thing he saw?"

Horatio shook his head. "No, this is a personal crime. It was intentional. They knew they were going to kill her. They just didn't know how."

Ryan was shaking his head, mumbling angrily to himself. Dave, the audio/visual tech was chuckling as he watched him walk around the lab. Ryan angrily put on a par of glove and then grabbed a box and pulled a manila envelope out. He cut open the envelope, and reached inside to pull open a mall bracelet. Ryan didn't notice Dave coming up behind him, as he was too busy eyeing the piece of jewelry when suddenly he felt hands on his hips.

Startled, Ryan jumped and almost dropped the bracelet out of his hands. Once he realized he had a firm grip on it, he breathed out in relief. Dave laughed and removed his hands from Ryan.

"You're a little jumpy, Ryan." He told him.

"Don't touch me at work." Ryan snapped. "I could have dropped this thing and ruined possible evidence. It costs more than both of our salaries combined."

Dave retreated, even putting his hands up in surrender. "Calm down, no one saw me touch you. And besides, I'm sure that bracelet has insurance."

Ryan had hoped he was joking but knowing Dave, he had a feeling he wasn't. Ryan put the bracelet down on the table, and then pulled out more equipment to dust for fingerprints before facing him. "Don't you have work to do," to which Dave shook his head no and smiled, "okay, why are you here? Just to bother me?"

"I'm wondering if you'd join me tonight. And also wondering what happened with Rick."

"No." Ryan answered. "And he had the nerve to criticize me for not wanting to go see a counselor to talk about Jesse. He says it proves that I don't care about anything or anyone in lab, and that's not true. I did care- I do care; but honestly I didn't know him as well as the others. I did work with him, yes but we didn't know each other on a personal level. I am sad about his death though, but I don't need to see a counselor."

Dave nodded and sighed. "Man, that's heavy. So, why don't you want to come over tonight? You bailed on me last night, which was understandable, but I'm starting to think you're seeing another guy." He laughed. Ryan stopped looking at the man and turned his attention back to the piece of neglected jewelry lying on the countertop.

Ryan cleared his throat. "I have a lot of work to do. So if you don't need me for anything job related, then I'd really appreciate it if you'd let me get back to it."

Dave stared at the side of Ryan's face in disbelief. That was all he could see. "So, you're really seeing someone else?"

Ryan looked around, making sure no one else was able to sneak up on him. "No, I was with Natalia, Walter, Eric and Calleigh last night. And tonight I'm going to see family. You have the wrong idea and I don't want to talk about this here." Ryan answered. He didn't once look up to face the other man. When he heard the sound of Calleigh and Natalia talking nearby, he felt instant relief. Ryan noticed Dave backing away from him and soon, he was alone in the room.

He couldn't tell Dave that he was with Horatio last night and that he'd be seeing him again tonight. When they had met, Dave knew about Ryan's crush on Horatio. Apparently it had been obvious to him. Soon after meeting, Ryan invited Dave out or a drink. He knew how he felt about him and figured Dave could help him get over the lieutenant. And Dave was more than willing to try. Although it seemed that as of late, he'd become increasingly more and more jealous whenever Horatio's name came out of Ryan's mouth.

They'd been seeing each other at least twice a week for two months now. But it didn't matter how many times they got together, Ryan just couldn't get over Horatio. And Dave was patient with him, saying he didn't want to be intimate unless Ryan was completely over his crush on the boss. But Ryan had known Horatio so long. This was no small crush, it was so much more than that. If he had told him the truth, that he was seeing Horatio tonight, things would go awry. He would be upset, to say the very least. And Ryan didn't want that. So he had to lie. Although he knew that eventually the truth would have to come out. He had just hoped things wouldn't go too bad.

Horatio opened the door to a sheepish looking Ryan. He was surprised to see him there. They'd agreed to meet at a bar, but apparently that wasn't happening.

"I thought we were…" Horatio started speaking but once he had seen how distraught Ryan looked, he stepped to the side to let his colleague in. To which, Ryan complied and bit his bottom lip harshly. Horatio closed the door behind him but kept his eye on him. "Are you alright?"

"I don't know." Ryan chuckled. "I just really need to apologize for last night. If I don't do it now, I won't have the courage to later."

"Mr. Wolfe, I don't think-."

"I was pretty drunk and I must've done something wrong. You barely acknowledged me this morning when you came to pick me up. I don't know how bad I got but I couldn't live with myself if I have done something to offend you in any way. So, I'm sorry Horatio. I hope you forgive me."

Horatio stared in shock. He wasn't sure what Ryan was talking about. What could Ryan have done to offend him He ran his fingers through his hair, was close enough to breathe on his ear, and he had pushed his body against Horatio's. But he had just thought that was the alcohol consumption that had blurred Ryan's thoughts.

Ryan couldn't look Horatio in the eye. Suddenly, he had a feeling this was a bad idea. He shouldn't have come. He should have just stayed home like he had planned on doing originally.

"Dad?"

Both of them turned their heads to the direction of the voice. Kyle stood there in the doorway, leading to the kitchen. Ryan felt his face getting warm. Now Kyle heard, how embarrassing. He should have asked first to make sure that Horatio was alone. How could he have forgotten that he was shaving dinner with Kyle?

"Kyle," Horatio's voice broke the silence, "it seems Mr. Wolfe needs my assistance with something tonight."

Kyle nodded. "No problem. I'll just see you tomorrow." He went to the door, where Ryan noticed shoes were by. Kyle began to put them on and lace them up, while smiling at Ryan. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt." Ryan apologized.

Kyle waved him off and opened the door. "It's fine, we just finished dinner and were just talking and catching up. No problem, like I said. See you both later." He gave his dad a hug goodbye and gave Ryan a head nod. Then, he was gone.

"Would you like to sit down?" Horatio asked. Ryan quickly shook his head. "No, I shouldn't stay long. I just wanted you to know that I was sorry."

"But what are you sorry about?" Horatio inquired. Ryan finally looked him in his eyes. He looked so confused and concerned at the same time. They both did. Ryan felt even more foolish. "You didn't say or do anything to offend me. Why would you think I did?"

"I just- I don't know." He tried to find the right words. "This morning you barely spoke to me and you wouldn't even look me in the eyes. And when I'm drunk, I know I can do some very questionable things."

Horatio nodded .He was contemplating bringing it up to Ryan; the way he looked at him last night was something Horatio hadn't seen in a long time. It wasn't admiration or even appreciation of Horatio being there for him. It wasn't a look a friend would give another. Honestly, no one had looked at Horatio the way Ryan did since Marisol.

But that was his wife so that was understandable. Ryan Wolfe was his coworker. And Horatio was his lieutenant.

"Mr. Wolfe, last night was fine. Nothing happened." Horatio explained.

Ryan shook his head. "Call me 'Ryan'."

"What?"

"Call me by my first name. I hate when you address me by my last name. You call the others by their first names, so why not me, too? It's like you have them on a pedestal that I'm too low to ever reach." Ryan wasn't speaking the way he usually did. He was usually so calm and collected.

Now he seemed rushed and frantic. Maybe even a little bit frustrated, Horatio concluded. The older could see why Ryan would feel that way. He did call his colleagues by their given names. But he only referred to Ryan by his surname. There wasn't a specific reason why, only that he liked to.

"If it bothers you then I will call you by your first name." Horatio nodded. "Will that be all?"

"Are you dismissing me?" Ryan asked, incredulous.

"No, I'm asking you if you need anything else. What had gotten you so defensive?" He asked. He was genuinely concerned about Ryan. He'd never seen him so hostile and on-edge before outside of working on a case. Maybe Ryan was just stressed out. The cases were becoming more and more intense. And Horatio had heard about Stetler lurking around the lab. Maybe he had said something to set him off.

Ryan was giving him that look again. It was the same one from last night. They both stared at each other. Horatio wanted to look away but he couldn't. He just found Ryan's brown eyes captivating.

Before Horatio could do or say anything, Ryan closed the distance in between them, coming closer. Ryan stared deeply at him, only dropping his gaze down to his chest. He noticed that Horatio was still wearing his suit. He was sure the man didn't actually own casual clothing. His jacket was unbuttoned, and Ryan reached out. With how close they were, he didn't have to reach very far.

Ryan touched Horatio's chest lightly. Really, he just wanted to rip his shirt off but he couldn't. He had to go slow as to not scare him off. He was a bit afraid of looking in his eyes again. What if he was giving him a look of disapproval? Or even worst; disgust? But Ryan had to. He willed himself to look up. Horatio's eyes were closed. His chest was expanding and retracting slowly with each deep breath he took. All Ryan had wanted to do was touch him a little. But now, he wanted more.

Should he push his luck? He'd already came this far so why shouldn't he continue? Ryan moved his face closer to Horatio's. He could sense the younger CSI, Ryan could tell. His breathing stalled for a split second but then continued on slowly. Ryan kissed Horatio on the lips. He went slowly and it was just a peck. Once he did it, he looked at Horatio again. His eyes were still closed, so Ryan kissed him again. He didn't care about anything anymore; he just wanted Horatio.

Ryan pulled away from the kiss. Horatio's eyes popped open as soon as he did. Ryan didn't see it though, he was already down on his knees in front of the lieutenant. He had just started fumbling with his belt buckle when he felt his hand on his shoulder. Ryan paused and looked up at the man, afraid he had gone too far.

He didn't expect to see Horatio grinning down at him. "Bedroom, Ryan?" He suggested. He quickly nodded and Horatio took his hand. Once he guided him to his feet, Ryan let Horatio lead the way. Up the stairs and down a long hallway and into a large white room with a large bed with red satin- no, maybe silk- sheets on it. Ryan went in first with Horatio behind him.


	4. No More Talking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some uh, mature scenes in this chapter. It's my first time writing a scene like this. Eh; you learn from experience. I'll get better, I promise Sorry it's so short.

Four

Ryan couldn't believe this was happening. For years, he has wanted this and it was finally happening. He just kept waiting for an alarm clock to turn on and ring to wake him up. There was just no way this could be real, it had to have been a dream. But no alarm clock went off. And Ryan was okay with that.

Horatio was sitting at the edge of the bed, with Ryan on his knees on the soft carpet. He already had his clothes off; he'd taken them off the moment he had stepped into the room. Ryan just wasn't patient. Horatio on the other hand had only taken his suit jacket off. But Ryan didn't mind, he was just happy to finally have Horatio. And after Ryan unzipped Horatio's pants he wasted no time taking him into his mouth.

Horatio made a soft noise, almost like a low growl and his head lulled to the side. From the moment Ryan wrapped his lips around him, he felt himself become hard. Painfully so. Ryan licked and sucked at it, even touching his own aching cock.

Horatio gripped Ryan's short hair tightly, and pushed him down to take him I deeper. Ryan had to put his hands on Horatio's thighs to keep balance. His fingernails would have been digging into the man's skin if he didn't still have his pants on. Horatio thrust into his mouth deeper and harder each time he moved his hips, making the younger gag. But Ryan would have been lying if he said he didn't like it.

He'd always thought about what it would be like to be intimate with Horatio. He imagined it would be gentle and soft like his naturally caring attitude. But this Horatio was rough, and Ryan liked it.

He finally was able to come up for air and looked into Horatio's eyes. The blue was almost completely gone as his pupils were blown up largely. He stared intently at Ryan. Without a second thought, he lifted Ryan and threw him onto the bed. No time was being wasted; Horatio took his shirt off and his pants and underwear followed quickly after. Then, he was on top of Ryan, kissing his lips before moving down to his neck.

Ryan threw his head back as the object of his affections began sucking and biting the sensitive skin. He hoped it would leave a mark- proof in the morning that this was real and it happened.

Ryan brought his middle finger to his mouth, opening it and sucking on it. Horatio had stopped leaving love marks on him to watch as Ryan spread his legs and brought his finger down to his hole. He teased himself for a while before slipping it inside. His lips parted slightly and Horatio took that as his chance to slip his tongue inside Ryan's mouth. Ryan moaned contently, brushing his finger of the small bundle of nerves inside.

Horatio began rubbing Ryan's nipple; the younger felt so needy under him. He hadn't felt this in a long time and wanted it badly. Horatio kissed him on the cheek and Ryan watched as he covered his own finger in saliva and brought it down to Ryan's puckered hole. He shuddered, feeling his lovers finger inside him accompanied with his own.

Horatio smirked into their kiss. Ryan was a wriggling mess under him; so needy- grinding down onto the two fingers trying to get them to go deeper. When they stopped kissing again, Ryan smiled. "I need you inside of me." He breathed out deeply. "Now, Horatio."

Both fingers were withdrawn from his body. Horatio rolled over the bed to his nightstand table. Reaching inside, he pulled out a small bottle of lube, and continued to rummage through the drawer. Ryan watched as Horatio began to frown. "I can't find a condom. You didn't happen to bring any, did you?"

Ryan sadly shook his head no. He couldn't believe it. They had gotten this far just to his a roadblock.

Horatio's frown deepened and he hummed a small 'hmm'.

Ryan panicked. "We don't have to use one! I'm clean and I'm sure you are too." He said. Horatio seemed skeptical. He knew Ryan and he knew they both trusted each other with their lives. And Ryan hadn't really lied to him before- at least not with a situation like this one. Not like they ever had been like this before.

Horatio had been with a few guys before in his life. But he had never not used protection before. He was unbelievably horny and he couldn't deny how badly he wanted Ryan right at that moment. So would he let this ruin the moment?

He opened the lube and began rubbing it on himself. When he deemed himself ready, he returned to Ryan and poured some lube onto his hole. Ryan immediately shivered and his whole body jolted. He heard Horatio chuckling lowly. "It's cold." Ryan said softly, though he was sure it was obvious.

Ryan closed his eyes when he felt Horatio's member nudging into him slowly. His mouth opened wide but no sound came out. Without giving him time to adjust, Horatio began thrusting in and out of him roughly. That made a cluster of moans profanities escape Ryan's lips.

It was just as perfect as Ryan could have imagined. He didn't want it to end anytime soon. And if it did, he'd want to do it again but he wasn't so sure if he could take it.

Ryan was nearing completion. He took hold of his member and began pumping it just as fast as Horatio was fucking into him. Horatio knew he was close, so he started kissing and biting Ryan's neck again.

Ryan tensed and threw his head back against the bed. He came with a loud, lustful moan. Horatio kept thrusting, even as he felt him clenching. He was close to finishing too. Biting down on the neck harder, Ryan thought he might break the skin but he didn't even care. He was leaving his mark on his and Ryan loved it. When suddenly, Horatio stalled his movement. His mouth hung gaped and with a low groan, he came right inside of the younger man.

Both were breathing heavily. A few sweat droplets formed on Horatio's forehead. He slowly pulled out of Ryan, who was still mewling under him. They stared deep into each other's eyes and kissed lightly. Ryan smiled when they stopped and Horatio got off of the bed. He held his hand out. "Would you like to shower, Ryan?"

Ryan grabbed his hand and let him lead the way.


	5. The Morning After

Five

Waking up, Horatio groaned and sighed when he took sight of the younger CSI lying in the bed next to him. Ryan was sleeping soundly, facing Horatio. He watched as his chest would rise and fall as he breathed. Funny, he thought. He'd always pictured Ryan as a snorer.

Horatio swung his legs off of the bed and stood up. He needed his coffee if he were going to get through the day. He couldn't believe things had gotten this far. Sure, Ryan was a handsome man, he thought. And he was always very passionate and caring towards others. But Horatio hadn't had these feelings in a long time. Not since Jesse had come back.

Jesse Cardoza; Horatio's heart ached just thinking of the man. They had met years ago. Jesse had been the one to recommend Tim Speedle to join the team. Horatio agreed. He would have done anything for Jesse. He could have referred someone who was completely incompetent and Horatio would have considered hiring them. Considered though he would never be foolish enough to hire anyone that was not qualified. Luckily, Speedle had been more than great at doing his job.

After Jesse moved away to California, Horatio was heartbroken. They kept in touch as they could over the years but it just wasn't the same. Soon, Horatio met Marisol and fell completely in love with her. She was perfect in every way. The only time he'd think of Jesse then was when he contacted the redhead.

But when he came back to Miami, it was like everything he had ever felt about him just came rushing back. He didn't know if it was just because Jesse was back and he never had a chance for closure, or if he still loved him. Whatever the reason, Horatio could not deny the feeling that were there. But he couldn't tell Jesse the truth. Although he always had been very open and understanding. Horatio just couldn't bring himself to admit his feelings to him. Horatio knew Jesse could never feel the same way about him. And he didn't want to put the burden on him by revealing it. So Horatio kept quiet.

He drank from his coffee cup and looked at the clock. 7:13am.

Ryan was a good guy. But how did he feel about Horatio; did he have genuine feelings for him? Or did he just want sex? More importantly, how did Horatio even feel about Ryan? Sure he was attracted to him, he had no problem admitting that. And he definitely had love for him, which went without saying. But was Ryan someone Horatio could see himself being with long term? Or maybe he was just good sexual relief? Horatio was confused.

When he looked at him, he had the urge to just kiss him all over and fuck him senseless. But he wasn't sure if he wanted to take Ryan out on a date. Perhaps the lust had just taken over Horatio last night and he couldn't handle it anymore. Although he couldn't deny the night Ryan had too much to drink. Ryan looked at him; really looked at him. And if Ryan had kissed him that night, he might have reciprocated.

His thoughts went back to Jesse. That was the same day he died. He was so quick to leave Ryan that night because he immediately thought of Jesse. It felt as if Horatio was betraying his own feelings, although he knew that wasn't the case. He couldn't help who he was attracted to. But he could control his actions.

Horatio made his way back into his bedroom, carrying a tray with a plate of food and a small glass of orange juice. Sitting it down on the bedside table, he gently touched Ryan's shoulder while saying his name softly.

Ryan smiled, eyes still closed. He let out a small noise, almost like a moan. He was still sleeping. "Horatio…"

The man dreamed about him? Horatio's breathing stalled as he looked at Ryan. Taking his hand off his shoulder, he noticed he frowned at the loss of physical contact.

"Ryan, wake up." Horatio said louder. Ryan stirred and opened his eyes, squinting at him. "We have work today. I have breakfast for you."

Ryan almost panicked. He was in an unfamiliar bed. Horatio's bed. His bosses bed. He was in Horatio's house. And what was it he had said; he had breakfast for him?

Lifting the blankets he saw he was naked. Last night was no dream. He and Horatio really had sex. He couldn't believe it. He finally looked back to him and noticed Horatio was eyeing him with a very confused expression. He needed to say something- anything. "Um, good morning, Horatio." Pull yourself together Ryan. "You made me breakfast?"

Horatio motioned to the plate. "It's not much; just eggs, toast, a breakfast bar and orange juice. I wasn't sure what you liked."

Ryan was in awe. Not only did he have sex with Horatio last night, but he also stayed over. And instead of kicking him out in the morning, he had breakfast made for him. "You didn't have to make me anything, I usually just grab a bagel on my way to work. But thank you, I really appreciate it. It looks good." Ryan told him. He leaned up, and made sure the blanket was covering the lower half on his body before Horatio placed the tray on his lap. "After I eat, I'll go ahead and go home." He continued. "It wouldn't look too good if I showed up to work wearing the same clothes from yesterday." He laughed softly and rubbed his neck and was met with pain.

Wincing, he took his hand away. Why was his neck hurting? Well, Horatio was biting it last night. Horatio observed; there was an angry purple bruise. "I'll get you some cream for that. It should help it heal faster." He ducked into the bathroom, hiding the blush forming on his face. He couldn't believe his own roughness last night. It had been a while since he'd been intimate with someone. He had a lot of pent-up sexual energy.

Returning with the small tube of cream, Horatio handed it off to Ryan. He almost put the cream on for him, but he thought maybe that would be overstepping his boundaries. Ryan sat the cream down to finish his breakfast first. "This was really great of you, Horatio."

Horatio smiled. "It's just a small breakfast."

"I know but I've never had a guy make me breakfast in the morning before." Ryan explained. "I don't usually stay long enough to have it, though."

Horatio only hummed in response. So Ryan usually had these hookups? Maybe he didn't like him after all. It was exactly as he had expected- just sex.

Ryan finished and Horatio took the tray from him. Of course Ryan objected saying he could put it away himself. But Horatio insisted that it was fine, it was his house so he could take care of it. Ryan applied the cream to his neck, and put his clothes from the night before. He said goodbye to his boss and was on his way home, hoping he wouldn't be late for work.


	6. Serial Killer

Six

It had been a full week since the death of the cheerleader, Janice Lee. She had a ton of friends and according to all of them, she was a sweet girl. A kind woman who didn't have enemies, and went out of her way to help others. According to them, she didn't have a boyfriend; her busy schedule didn't permit it. In between cheering for the local college football team and her actual telemarketing job, Janice spent her time volunteering in a nursing home. She was a nice girl.

The team had interrogated every person they knew about in the young woman's life. Everyone had valid alibis. The team dusted her apartment for fingerprints or any other sign that someone else had been in the apartment. The only ones were Janice's herself and two friends that were also on the cheerleading team with her. And they were seen at the football game getting ready around the time of the murder.

They checked for footprints. No one's shoes matched the print left at the crime scene. The CSI's even interrogated fans that came to the football games. They didn't have evidence to place any of them at the scene. The case had been marked unsolved.

But knowing Horatio's team, they knew it'd be solved eventually.

Calleigh was in the examination room for the bodies. Tom, the medical examiner had called her down specifically as this particular case involved a gun. Everyone knew Calleigh loved her guns. She was more than happy to oblige. After putting on a pair of gloves, she made her way to the body. Tom smiled to her. "I needed your expertise."

"Flattery will get you nowhere with me, Tom." She joked. "So what do we have?"

Tom shined a light on the chest of the man lying on the examination table. "His name is Gary Hall. The bullet went right into his chest. It was actually lodged into the heart. I pulled the bullet out; it's on that tray behind you."

Calleigh turned and picked up the baggy that contained the small bullet. "This is a .45 bullet. I'm guessing this is what killed him."

Tom shook his head. "You would think. But his heart stopped beating before he was even shot. Take a look at his neck," he instructed. Calleigh did. "There's rope marks that indicate a strangulation, which also wasn't the cause of death. But over here on the other side of his neck is what looks like another gunshot wound, which I'm thinking is the actual C.O.D."

"This was definitely personal- so brutal. But the bullet hole looks stretched out. Where's the bullet?"

Tom shrugged. "There's the problem- it's gone. Whoever shot this man took it upon themselves to take the bullet out."

"It looks too small to be a .45" Calleigh observed. "Another gun, maybe a .380? But why two different guns?"

"Maybe two different guns from two different suspects."

Calleigh shook her head. "So someone broke into his home, strangled him- which didn't kill, and then shot him. And then another person came in to shoot him in the chest, for what? To make sure he actually died? It doesn't make sense."

"Do these cases ever make sense?"

Calleigh's eyes widened. "Wait a minute, didn't the intruder come into the house via the window?" Tom nodded and she continued. "He came in through the kitchen window, just like Janice Lee's murderer. But serial killers don't usually change their routine. I'm still willing to bet though, that we can find some way to link the two victims together."

"There were no signs of strangulation or gunshot wounds on Janice, though. She was bludgeoned."

Calleigh nodded anyways and turned on her heels. "I'm gonna take this bullet to trace and talk to Horatio. Thanks Tom!" She called over her shoulder as she exited the room. Tom nodded and smiled to himself, chuckling. He began dusting for fingerprints on the body.

Ryan and Walter were talking in the lab about the bracelet Ryan inspected last week. It was found in Janice's home, just a few feet in front of her dead body. "There has to be something you missed." Walter told him.

Ryan shook his head defensively. "No, I'm telling you I did everything. I checked for fingerprints and Janice was the only one who touched it. I checked every jewelry store to see who carried this stupid thing and none of them recognize it. So I entertained the thought that maybe someone made it and gave it to the vic but there are no telling signs that could be matched to jewel makers in Miami. It just came from thin air."

Walter sighed. "Maybe the killer planted it there to throw us off."

"That's what I'm thinking."

Ryan looked up and saw Calleigh. He waved to her, which was met with a smile. He almost looked back to the bracelet, when he spotted a certain redhead. Horatio and Calleigh were talking and he wondered what it was about. He hadn't really spoken to Horatio since the morning he left his home. Sure, they talked about cases. But neither men made an attempt to see or speak to each other outside of the lab. Ryan was too nervous to and he was sure Horatio was too busy anyways.

Horatio smiled at Calleigh and then walked off toward his office.

Walter waved his hand in front of Ryan's face. "Hello, earth to Ryan." He said. "Come back to reality and get out of dreamland."

Ryan smiled awkwardly and sighed. "Sorry, I spaced out."

"I know. Too busy staring at Calleigh, right?"

"What?" Ryan's eyes widened.

"Hey, I don't judge. She is cute, but don't let Eric catch you staring at his girl. You know how territorial he is." Walter warned him, Ryan didn't know what to say back so he didn't reply. There was no way he was going to admit to checking out Horatio. Though, he had to admit he looked really good today. And every day, really.

Ryan told Walter to get back to work. His mind was suddenly filled with thoughts of Horatio. He needed to talk to him. Dave walked by the room, looking through the glass window and smiled at Ryan as he went by. Ryan sighed. He needed to talk to Dave first.

Horatio was in his office, his back facing the door and the phone pressed to his ear. He laughed, rare for anyone to hear. "Yes, I know. I get it… it's a funny joke… okay, I guess I'll just see you tonight… love you, too, Kyle. Bye." He hung up the phone and looked down at the piled of papers on the desk. He began sorting through them when there was a knock at the door.

Ryan stood already inside the room by the door. He shook his head. "Walter and I still can't find anything about Janice's bracelet. There's no special markings or ways it was made."

"Something's not right. Why would it be so far from her body and not on her wrist?" Horatio pondered out loud. Ryan also had wondered the same thing. But they simply just did not know the answer.

"We'll find out who did it." Ryan assured him. "Horatio, I was wondering if maybe we could get together tomorrow night- I know you're busy tonight."

How did Ryan know that? Oh, he must have heard his phone conversation with Kyle. "I'm not sure."

"I understand. I just thought that maybe we could talk. So we can clear some things up so that there's no confusion between us." He explained. That actually didn't sound like a bad idea, to Horatio. He also wanted to know exactly what was going on; was it just a hookup? Did Ryan want to date him? He wouldn't see why he would; Horatio was old enough to be his father.

He nodded. "Okay, tomorrow. Is 7 o'clock good for you?" Horatio asked. Ryan smiled and nodded. "My place or yours?"


	7. Breaking Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has a chat with Dave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of drama in this chapter. Dun dun dunnnnn. Hope you enjoy!

Seven

It wouldn't be a big deal, right?

Dave had known all along how Ryan had felt about Horatio. Ever since the beginning of their odd relationship, Ryan had specifically stated that what he felt for Horatio was no mere crush. He was helplessly in love with him and there was no guarantee that would go away. There was no guarantee he would ever fall in love with Dave.

And they were together twice a week for two months now but neither of them had defined their relationship. Were they dating, or were they just hanging out together? It wasn't as if they ever slept together. They had only kissed once, but Ryan had told Dave that he didn't want to give him false hope. So, they didn't have physical contact like that again.

So telling Dave that he couldn't see him again wouldn't have been a big deal, right? They weren't exclusive so it shouldn't matter. Even so, Ryan still felt bad. He knew that Dave liked him. And even though he told him there was no absolute guarantee that Ryan could ever like Dave back, he still felt at fault.

He had to do this the right way. They needed a clean break. No dragging it out longer than they needed to. That also meant no going to each other's homes to do this. It needed to be a public, yet quiet area that way Ryan could say what he needed to in secrecy. But where could they go, he wondered.

A restaurant was too intimate and inviting; it was like a date. And a fast food place just seemed to cruel to Ryan. Who could dump someone in a burger place while a creepy clown statue smiled at them in the background? Ryan certainly couldn't. The only other option was a bar. At least then, Dave could have a few drinks first. Maybe then that would make it less awful, Ryan thought. But maybe it wouldn't.

Ryan declined a drink from the bartender. He seemed to be annoyed that someone was sitting at the bar for twenty minutes now and hadn't ordered anything. But he'd noticed Ryan was fidgeting and twirling his thumbs and figured something was up. And he was right.

Dave greeted Ryan with a smile that was larger than life. He noticed Ryan's smile didn't seem as genuine as it usually was, but he didn't say anything about it. Dave sat on the stool next to him and observed Ryan. "You look good, Ryan." He told him.

Ryan ducked his head and nodded, still not quite used to having Dave complimenting him. He offered to buy Ryan a drink, which he declined. He needed to be completely sober for this. Dave ordered two shots anyways.

Ryan watched as he downed the shot, made a face and sighed deeply. He laughed to himself. Dave always did that when he drank alcohol. He didn't like the taste or the way it burned going down his throat. But he certainly liked the effects of it.

"I was glad when you called me." Dave snapped Ryan out of his thoughts. "For a second there, I was worried I had done something wrong and you were avoiding me."

Ryan shook his head. "No, you've done nothing wrong. You've always been so great to me, Dave." Even when he didn't deserve it. Ryan grabbed the neglected shot of alcohol and drank it in one gulp. The bartender refilled both small glasses and made his way to serve the other patrons.

"Well, I'm glad you called."

"You weren't busy were you?" Ryan asked, a little panicked. "This was a bit last minute. I usually give you a day in advance when I want to meet up."

Dave smiled at how flustered Ryan seemed. "No, I wasn't doing anything. I was just gonna heat up leftovers for dinner and maybe watch some TV tonight. But this is so much better."

Ryan shifted uncomfortably. This was not going to go well. "Actually, we need to talk. That's why I called you tonight."

"Oh? What about?"

"Well, I lied; the day Jesse died I told you that Eric, Calleigh, Walter, Natalia and I went out. That was true but left out the fact that Horatio was there, too." Ryan stared at the counter to avoid looking at Dave's face. "And I told you I was going to spend time with my family- that was a lie, too. I was with Horatio again."

There was some silence between them. Ryan had to continue.

"I thought it would upset you to know I was with him, so I lied. And I'm sorry for doing that. I just knew that you really liked me and you know of my feelings for Horatio and I just felt really bad about it."

He finally chanced it. Looking up to Dave, Ryan saw that he was staring intently at him. As much as he wanted to advert his gaze again, he couldn't. "You look guilty." Dave said slowly.

Ryan nodded. He had to get this over with. He needed to rip the metaphorical band aid off. "I don't think we should see each other anymore. My feelings for Horatio won't go away, at least not any time soon. And it's not fair to you to be my backup plan."

Dave showed no emotion. No trace of hurt, anger- nothing. He just stared at Ryan.

Kyle laughed loudly and shook his head. He and Horatio sat down together at a table instead of at the bar. The tables were more reclusive and intimate. "Dad you finally let me take you to a bar, and now you're telling me I can't buy you a drink?"

"I don't think so. I have to drive us back home." Horatio explained, smiling at his son. Ever since Kyle had returned home he'd been so adamant about taking Horatio out for a drink. It had taken constant insistence and being bothersome of Kyle's part, but his dad finally agreed to it.

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, come on. Just one drink; then I won't bother you about it anymore."

"Fine, Kyle," Horatio said. "Just one drink and that's it."

Kyle smiled feeling victorious. He instructed his father to stay right where he was, and stood to approach the bar. He fondled the I.D card in his hand and stood in front of the bartender with confidence. "Scotch on the rocks, please. Two, actually." He flashed his identification card, mimicking the smile from the picture. The bartender just chuckled to himself while he made the drinks.

Smiling, Kyle took a look around the bar His gaze fell on something familiar. There were two guys he thought he knew. Yeah, he thought, the guy with the long brown hair worked at the lab, right? He was the audio/visual guy. What was his name? Dale? Davis? No; it was Dave. And is that Ryan with him? Kyle didn't think those two would have been friends.

The bartender gave Kyle his drinks, which he promptly paid for and made his way back to the table to his dad. Horatio smiled and thanked him. Kyle nodded and they started to talk, but he couldn't focus.

"How's Ryan?" He asked. "Last time I saw him, he was going through a crisis or something."

Horatio drank a little from the glass and sighed. "Yeah, he was upset that night. But he's better now, I think."

Kyle smiled too. "Everyone in the lab respects you." He stated. "Especially Ryan. He trusted you enough to come to you with his problems. I hope that will happen for me some day. You know, having a job I love, being friendly with my co-workers and them confiding in me. Sounds good to me."

Horatio drank some more. "Well, we all care about each other and that definitely shows. You have great friends, Kyle. And they respect you, too."

Horatio was right. Kyle did have great friends and he trusted them with everything. Just like his dad. It was refreshing to see, thought. Kyle didn't ever see his dad hanging out with people outside of work. He was starting to think that Horatio didn't have friends or associate with others outside of the lab. He was glad he did. And Ryan and Dave were here, too. Maybe they should invite them to join the father/son pair.

He took a drink as he started redirecting his eyes to the bar where Ryan was. He did not look happy. He looked sad. And Dave was staring hard at him, talking about something. Of course he couldn't hear the conversation, as he was too far away. But it seemed like they were arguing.

He watched as Dave stopped looking so heatedly at Ryan. His face softened and he said something else to Ryan. Ryan in turn, shook his head a few times. Dave continued talking. Finally Ryan looked down for a moment and then nodded. What the hell is going on, Kyle thought.

His mouth gaped when he saw Dave use his hands to cup Ryan's face. Without any hesitation, he kissed him. And Ryan's hands rested on Dave's waist.

Kyle didn't mean to stare. He didn't have a problem with it, really. He just didn't know Ryan was gay. And he wouldn't have guessed the man was dating the newest edition to their team. Did Horatio know? He turned to face his dad, expecting to see him just finishing up his drink. But Kyle had spaced out for a while now and he noticed. Horatio wanted to see what his son was staring at so blatantly. So he looked. Horatio didn't expect to see Ryan here at the same bar as them. And he certainly didn't think he'd see him with Dave.

"Dad, are you okay?"

Horatio turned to Kyle, who looked concerned and maybe a little confused. He smiled and nodded. "I'm fine. Do you want to come to my house? We can order in and watch a few movies if you'd like."

He didn't even wait for Kyle to answer. Horatio was already up and making his way to the door. Kyle slid out of the chair and walked behind, after his father, turning one last time to face the two men that had just devoured each other's faces in front of the whole bar. Well, not too many people paid attention to them anyways.

Dave and Kyle locked eyes. Dave stared at him so sternly he didn't want to look away. There was no emotion in the man's eyes. Kyle hadn't even realized he stopped walking and was just standing there having a staring contest with this man he'd only met once or twice before. Ryan noticed. When he saw Kyle, his face lit up in horror. Kyle saw him now. Ryan's face was flushed, he looked so pale and very freaked out to see him. Maybe this was a secret date, Kyle gathered. Ryan grabbed Dave by his arm, pulling him up and they walked off in the opposite direction.

Kyle finally went outside to find his dad. Which of course wasn't hard to do. Horatio sat inside his car, his head was back against the headrest and the car was running. The moment Kyle got into the car, Horatio threw it into drive and peeled out of the parking lot. They didn't speak the entire ride. When they got back to Horatio's home, he ended up excusing himself to bed and told Kyle he could order food if he wanted. He could even put it on his card.

Horatio was upset- genuinely so. No one besides Kyle and Marisol got to see that side of him. What was going on with his dad, Kyle wondered.

Ryan sat at home in silence. He told Dave the truth- that he didn't want to 'be' with him anymore. Their odd relationship was over now. But that didn't make him feel any better. After telling this to him, Dave just stared at him blankly. It was almost intimidating. When he finally spoke, it took Ryan by surprise. He said that he was in love with him. How could he love him? Ryan was so closed off, he never disclosed personal information to him. Dave essentially didn't know anything about him. And they never were physical with each other. Ryan just didn't understand.

When Ryan tried explaining that to him, Dave became angry. He said that Ryan was wrong and he shouldn't try to tell him how he felt when he didn't know. But Ryan remained calm and simply reiterate; he didn't want to see him again outside of the lab. He didn't feel the same way toward Dave as he had to him. They were on two completely different levels.

But Dave wouldn't accept that. He asked Ryan if they could kiss. Of course, he recoiled, dropped his head shook it. There was no way they could kiss. Dave told him that if Ryan just kissed him one time, it would be enough. He could tell him after if he didn't feel anything at all toward Dave other than friendship. Then, he would leave Ryan alone. And he agreed to it. He knew it was a stupid way to prove he had no romantic feelings for the other man, but he did it anyways.

And that turned out to be a terrible decision.

They kissed and as predicted, there was nothing there. But Kyle had seen them. Horatio's son had caught him and Dave together and there was absolutely no way to begin to explain it to him. Was Horatio there too? Ryan hadn't seen him, only Kyle. Would Kyle tell him dad what he saw? More than likely.

Ryan needed to speak to Horatio. He had to tell him the truth. He wanted him to know that he did not want to be with Dave. He wanted to be with Horatio- he loved him. He had for years and he always would. He didn't want Horatio to have the wrong impression of him.

Ryan would have thought it was planned. That Dave had asked to kiss him because he knew Kyle was watching. But after taking him to the other side of the bar, and out of eyesight from Kyle, Dave seemed weird.

"Was that Horatio's son? Why was he staring at us like that?"

"Yeah, that was Kyle." Ryan explained. "He'll probably tell Horatio now. Everything's ruined."

And then Dave laughed. He just laughed in his face.

So, Ryan left him there and got in his car and drove home.


	8. Resemblance

Eight

"I can't believe I got called in on my day off." Calleigh said. "What do we have?"

Natalia smiled at her friend and shook her head disbelief. They were CSI's; really, the blond should have been used to this by now.

"His name is Mitchell Stokes, he was twenty-five years old. His boyfriend was the one who called it in." Natalia told her. She pointed over towards Frank. He was talking to a young looking man. He seemed to be upset. But of course, he'd just his boyfriend's dead body. Calleigh sighed as Tom made his way over to the two girls.

"Gunshot wounds." He said. That was all he said for Calleigh to understand. She turned to Natalia, who was first to respond to the call. She was first on the scene. "Hey Natalia, were there footprints and a broken kitchen window?"

Natalia shook her head. "Nope, the window wasn't broken." She answered. "There were no signs of forced entry. Whoever did this was let inside. But there are muddy footprints in the living room."

Calleigh and Tom both shared a look. "The one to report a death is usually the one who committed the crime. Make sure he gets brought in for questioning. Tom, you take me to the body."

Natalia made her way over to Frank and the victim's boyfriend. Tom ushered Calleigh inside the house, in the direction of the body. "Brace yourself, Cal. Something about this guy may look familiar to you." She began to question what he meant but as soon as she saw the murdered victim, Mitchell, she knew. Her mouth widened slightly and she just breathed out. "He looks a lot like Ryan."

Tom nodded. "I thought so too. I had to do a double-take just to make sure it wasn't actually him. But it's definitely not Ryan, so maybe a relative? We won't know until we run DNA." He bent over the body. "Strangulation marks around the neck here. Gunshot wound to the chest."

"There's a .45 casing on the floor."

"That's the gun that was used. But take a look inside the wound." He urged her. Calleigh looked closely into the wound in the body. There was a bullet inside. Much too small to have been a .45.

"Is that a .308?" She asked Tom. He nodded again. "Whoever shot him with the .45 took the bullet out and put a .308 bullet inside. I think you may be right about this serial killer theory." He answered.

Ryan stared at the man sitting across from him. He looked sad. Almost down, but Ryan could immediately tell that something was off. "So, Mr. Oliver," he stated, "You say you came home and found your boyfriend dead- is that correct?"

Mr. Oliver slowly nodded his head. He let out a deep breath, even now blinking back some tears in his eyes that had begun forming. "Why don't you walk me through what happened?" Ryan suggested. Mr. Oliver looked as if that physically pained him. But he swallowed and sighed. "I was out visiting my sister; she just had a baby. She and Mitchell never really got along so he stayed home. I was at the hospital with her for about three hours. I tried calling Mitchell 3 times but he didn't answer. So, I got worried and rushed home and he was dead when I found him."

"Is there anyone that can verify where you were?"

"Yes. My sister, her husband and the doctors and nurses."

"Okay." Ryan said. "Now, Mitchell was murdered in the bedroom, as evidence shows. You have any idea why he was found in the living room? Did you move the body?"

Mr. Oliver shook his head. "No, I didn't touch him. I have no idea why. There were footprints in front of his body on the carpet but it's not his, I don't think. I don't recognize the prints."

"So you think Mitchell brought someone into your home?" Ryan asked him.

The man paused, and even cracked a small smile. He looked disappointed though. "He wasn't very faithful. Everyone knew it. He'd go out to bars and clubs and would hook up with just about anyone he could find. Once, I caught him with someone else. But I forgave him. I always forgave him. I loved him."

Ryan still stared at him. He was starting to feel bad for him. But he couldn't completely. Everything he said seemed so rehearsed. "So, Mr. Oliver you think this was a hook-up session gone wrong?" The other man nodded. "Then I'm going to need to know every bar and club that Mitchel frequented. And a list of his other companions if you know them."

Ryan slid a piece of paper and pen to him. He instantly began scribbling down everything Ryan needed to know. Once finished, Ryan collected the paper and told Mr. Oliver that he would 'keep in touch' as he began to leave the room. Behind the glass wall, he could see Horatio standing there, watching. Ryan closed the door behind him and approached his lieutenant. "Mr. Wolfe, I need to talk to you in private. It's about the victim."

Ryan agreed and followed behind him to the medical examination room. Instantly, he felt dread- not wanting to run into Dave as they walked by the lab area he worked in. To his surprise, he didn't see him there but he was in the examination room, which Ryan thought was odd. His kinda-sorta ex and the guy he loves currently in the same room frightened him. But they were professionals. And it was possible Horatio didn't even know about Ryan and Dave yet.

They stopped in front of the table where the victim lay. Dave seemed to just be standing by the body. "I heard and I just wanted to see for myself." Dave told Horatio. "Tom let me in and said I could observe." Ryan had no idea what he was talking about. Horatio only motioned to the body and took a step back. "Mr. Wolfe, do you know this man?"

Ryan stared very confused at the deceased man in front of him. "Mitchell Stokes? No, I don't know him. Why?"

"You don't see the resemblance?"

Ryan looked up to Dave but realized it wasn't him that had said it. It came from behind home. It was Tom, of course. Ryan shook his head no. What resemblance?

"Well, I have good news; Ryan isn't related to this man at all." Tom told them all. Horatio and Dave nodded, Ryan still confused. "See these marks on his face? Those are incision scars. From surgery."

"Surgery?" Ryan questioned.

Tom nodded. "Plastic surgery, Ryan. Horatio, is that something to go on?"

The redhead nodded and turned to leave out of the lab. Tom started explaining to Dave and Ryan more about the surgery and saying it had to have been somewhat recent, judging by the scar marks. Then Tom handed something to Ryan. "Found this, too. It was stuck to his skin. Looks like some type of chip; maybe something for Mr. Oliver to track his moves, perhaps? After you check it out for prints and DNA, I'm sure Dave here can figure out exactly what it is and what it does." Tom nodded to the two and he too, left the room.

Ryan wanted to follow him, to not be alone with Dave. But he'd noticed Dave giving him an odd look. "I was thinking you and I could get together again tonight? We can finish where we left off last night."

Ryan almost gagged listening to him. "I have plans tonight."

"Another guy?" Dave laughed. "Nothing worse than a CSI that gets around the entire lab. Eric Delko is next on your list, right? Or was he before me? Maybe Tom's next."

Ryan balled his fist and moved closer to Dave. How dare he even insinuate that there was something between him and Eric? They were friends and Eric was so in love with Calleigh. And he didn't even like Eric in that way. And well for Tom, he just wasn't Ryan's type.

"You don't know what you're talking about and I'd prefer not to have this conversation here anyways." Ryan said sternly. Dave glared at him, probably for the first time. "You went from Eric, to me, and then to Horatio. But I wouldn't doubt it if Mr. Jesse Cardoza was on that list too before he died."

Ryan didn't say anything else. He didn't know what to say. Him and Jesse? Sure, he was handsome but there was no way he would have ever slept with him. He wasn't sure what Dave was talking about anymore. He had no idea if he was being serious or if he was just saying this to get under his skin.

"Gentlemen, this is not the time nor the place for that discussion." They heard on the intercom. Both men looked up. Horatio stood behind the glass looking down at them. "Do it on your own time. We have a case to solve." And then he was gone.

Ryan didn't even bother to look at Dave again. He didn't want to see him. He left the room and decided to check out the list Mr. Oliver had made for him. Dave only rolled his eyes, gave Mitchell Stokes one last look, covered his face with a sheet and went back to the AV lab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Even more drama, I'm so sorry


	9. Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More sex

Nine

Ryan was freaking out. 

After work, he had sent Horatio a text asking what time he should come over so they could talk. After waiting a full hour he finally gotten a response. The text simply said 'don't come'. And that was that. Ryan immediately texted back asking why, saying that they just had to talk. But that went unanswered. He called Horatio twice and received the voicemail both times. Instantly, he panicked. Horatio knew about Ryan and Dave, but now he had been accused of sleeping with Eric Delko and Jesse Cardoza. Oh, and apparently Tom was next. But Ryan knew perfectly well as to why that would have been shocking for Horatio to hear. He didn't want him to think so lowly of Ryan; that he just made his way through the men of the crime lab. He wasn't like that. Well, at least he wasn't accused of sleeping with Rick Stetler.

Ryan shivered at the mere thought of Stetler touching him.

He just couldn't believe Dave would say things like he did. He'd always been such a nice guy and treated Ryan right. But since he'd been formally rejected, he was being rude. And lying. Dave knew Ryan wasn't the kind of guy who would just have sex with anyone. He needed feelings and an emotional attachment to that person. Call him old fashioned. He would fight the one he loved.

So Ryan took a shower, cleaned himself up and drove to a store. He picked up a bottle of scotch, Horatio's favorite drink, and made his way to the lieutenant's house. Ryan just hoped he wouldn't slam the door in his face. Though, he doubted that; it wasn't in his character. And he hoped that Kyle wasn't there again. But it didn't really matter who was there, Ryan thought. He was going to tell Horatio he loved him and nothing was going to stop him.

After driving to the home, he sighed happily. While driving, Ryan became worried- what if Horatio wasn't even home? Then he would have just had to wait and who knew when he'd be back. But his car sat in the driveway alone. He parked by the curb in front of the house, took a few deep breaths, mentally told himself that he could do this. Then, Ryan deemed himself ready.

He made his way up the drive way, clutching the bottle of scotch tightly. Before he could make it to the front door, the garage opened slowly. The noise and new movement startled Ryan. But when it opened all the way and exposed the redhead in a suit, he calmed down. Only a little.

Horatio eyed Ryan. "What are you doing here?"

"I brought you scotch," he forced the bottle into Horatio's hands. "I know it's your favorite."

Horatio held the bottle and just stared at it. Then, "why are you here, Ryan?" He stared deep into Ryan's eyes. It seemed liked he was staring right into him. Ryan tried to smile, but it faltered and felt forced. "I wanted to talk to you."

"I'm busy right now. I was about to leave, actually."

"Just give me ten minutes. It's really important. And then after we talk if you still want me to leave, then I will." Ryan pleaded.

Horatio sighed and pointed to the door. "Go inside then." He gave the bottle back to Ryan, who took it and made his way into the garage and through the door. He was nervous. He needed to just lay it all out for Horatio. Ryan needed him to know everything. And if Horatio wanted nothing to do with him after then he would have to respect that. Although, he hoped otherwise.

Ryan went into the kitchen. He'd never been in the room before. Actually, the only rooms he saw was the bedroom and the living room. The kitchen was white, gold and red in colour. The walls and countertops were a pure white while the window curtains were a deep red. There were gold placemats on the table, and gold artworks on the walls. Ryan just thought it looked amazing He was sure the whole house was just as beautiful.

When he heard the garage door closing, Ryan sat the bottle of scotch on one of the placemats and went out to the living room. After a minute, he saw Horatio entering the room. Horatio sat down on the couch and sighed as he tried to relax. Ryan watched him as he did so. Horatio looked peaceful and calm.

Finally Horatio extended his arm. "Are you going to sit?"

Ryan shook his head. "No. I'm just going to say what I came to say and then I'll go home." He answered. Horatio hummed in response, waiting for him to continue. "First, I want to apologize about what happened in the lab today with Dave. The whole conversation, or argument really, was inappropriate to have at work. Especially while trying to solve murders. So, I'm sorry, it won't happen again."

Horatio nodded. "Okay."

Just an 'okay', Ryan thought. This was not going well.

"I'm sorry about last night, at the bar." Ryan said slowly, still unsure if Horatio had known about it or not. Though, he was sure he did. "I was there trying to end things with Dave. But he was very persistent to see if I had feelings for him. And I don't."

"What you do in your personal life is of no concern of mine. Who you date is your business." Horatio told him. Ryan shook his head. "No, we weren't dating. We were friends, but I knew Dave had actual feelings for me so I wanted to end it before he got too attached."

"Well, good for you."

Ryan sighed. "Horatio you have to believe me when I say this- I'm not 'making my way through the lab' like he said. I have never had sex with Eric. And I never have been with Jesse either. He was a nice guy and I respected him so much but that was it."

Horatio nodded. Just thinking about Jesse and Ryan together made his heart ache. He couldn't say anything, out of fear of giving himself away.

Ryan stared expectantly at him. "Do you believe me? I wouldn't lie about something like this, you know."

"Oh I know," he answered. "I believe you. Dave was probably just angry and said some things to get a rise out of you."

"That's exactly it. I'm not that type of person. I don't just have sex with everyone." Ryan said.

"I distinctively remember the morning after you and I were together; you made a comment." Horatio hadn't meant to bring it up. But he had, and there was no use in going back on it now. "You said that you never had a guy make you breakfast before. And that—"

Ryan nodded. He was well aware of what he said. "And I said that I never stayed long enough to have it before. I know. A few years back I had a few guys that I would hook up with and then I'd bail on them before they woke up the next morning. But I would always feel guilty after. So, I decided that I wouldn't have sex with anyone else unless I had genuine feelings for them. And I haven't done that either. Until last week." He added quietly, hoping Horatio would catch on. He did.

"So since then, you haven't…?" He couldn't even finish his question. But Ryan was smart. He knew exactly what the man was asking. "I've been with someone else that I thought I liked but it didn't work out. But that was last year. You were the first person I've been with, in a year." He shook his head. "I like you so much and it's destroying what little bit of sanity I have left. I can't stand the fact that you looked at Jesse the same way I look at you. There was so much love in your eyes when you saw him. And last week, I thought maybe you finally saw me the same way. But I was wrong. You still love him."

Horatio looked away from Ryan. The younger man's eyes were glistening now, and he couldn't dare to look at him anymore. Ryan was in pain, he could see that. He had wished he'd known earlier but what would have fixed that? It was his fault. How long had Ryan felt this way about Horatio? How long did Ryan know of Horatio's feelings toward Jesse?

"So, you're telling me that you like me? For how long?" He asked.

Ryan shrugged. "No. I liked you when I first met you. But now it's so much more than that. I love you."

"You don't love me, Ryan." Horatio said. Ryan frowned and moved so he was standing in Horatio's line of sight again. "Yes, I do. Don't tell me how I feel. And I need you to honestly tell me what you think of me. How do you feel about me?"

Ryan seemed so genuine. Horatio felt bad now. He had no idea that Ryan had cared for him so much for so long. "I like you. I think you're a very attractive man."

With that, Ryan smiled. He couldn't help it. Horatio liked him. "I want to be with you. Not just physically, but I want to be in a relationship with you."

Horatio shook his head. "I don't know about that." He sighed. "Jesse just died, and I still-."

Ryan kissed him. It wasn't a light one either. Ryan dove right in and pressed his lips against Horatio's. Instantly, he was kissed back with just as much vigor. Horatio even deepened the kiss, gliding his tongue across Ryan's lips. He opened his mouth to let Horatio's tongue enter it. The kiss was wet and a little sloppy, but neither of them cared. It was exactly how they wanted it to be. Horatio put his hands around Ryan's waist, guiding him toward the couch. Ryan complied, getting on it and straddling him. Horatio broke from the kiss and tugged at the hem of Ryan's shirt. He put his arms up so the shirt could easily come off. The shirt was discarded carelessly onto the floor, which made Ryan want to pick it up and fold it neatly and put it elsewhere. But Horatio was already unbuttoning his pants.

Ryan stood to get his pants completely off. But then he suddenly stopped. He frowned but then finished taking them off, and putting them next to his shirt. He leaned over and pressed another firm kiss onto Horatio's lips. "Are you going to take your clothes off, too?" He asked him. Horatio nodded his head yes.

He shed his suit jacket easily. He started working with the buttons on his undershirt while Ryan began undoing his pants for him. He tugged the pants down as Horatio slid out of his shirt. He had tufts of curly red hairs on his chest, but Ryan liked it. He liked everything about Horatio.

Horatio was already hard. And he didn't want to waste another moment; he just wanted to be inside of Ryan. Reaching over to the small table by the couch, he grabbed a small bottle of lotion. He rubbed it on himself while Ryan just watched him. He didn't mind that Horatio was so eager; he was, too. Ryan wasn't even hard yet but he could easily get there by just watching Horatio touch himself.

Ryan took the bottle and squirted the lotion onto his own fingers. He got back on the couch, leaning over Horatio to give himself better access. Ryan slowly pushed two fingers into himself, not wanting to waste any time like Horatio. Ryan pumped the fingers inside himself slowly. It hurt a little, since he was used to just starting with one finger first. But as soon as he got accustomed to it, Horatio had taken a hold of his arm to stop him.

Ryan got the hint and reluctantly removed his fingers, not wanting to. But he knew that soon, he would be filled again. Horatio aligned his cock with Ryan's opening and slowly brought him down onto it. Ryan inhaled and gripped Horatio's shoulders. He closed his eyes tightly, as he brought himself up and slid down again. Ryan moaned softly as he worked up a steady pace.

Horatio watched Ryan with lust-filled eyes. He looked so perfect. His eyes were closed tightly, his moans were increasingly getting louder as they progressed and every so often he'd close his mouth to muffle himself. He would bite his bottom lip and that would be enough to send Horatio over the edge.

Ryan opened his eyes to see the blue already looking at him. He shied away, putting his head down onto Horatio's shoulder. His rhythm never stopped, even as Horatio began lifting his hips to meet Ryan's. One particular hard thrust made Ryan cry out louder.

"Do you like that?" Horatio whispered gently. Ryan frantically nodded his head yes. But Horatio wanted a response. "Use your words, Ryan. Do you like it?"

"Fuck yes" Ryan moaned. "It feels so good."

He lifted his head from Horatio's shoulder, and planted a very firm kiss on his lips. They opened their mouths, slipping their tongues into each other's. Horatio took a hold of Ryan's dick and began to pump it in time with each thrust. Ryan let out a small whimper as he dug his nails into Horatio's back. Everything just felt so perfect.

After a few more moments of Horatio jacking him off, Ryan stopped moving and instinctively began tapping Horatio on the shoulder. "I'm going to cum." He said. Ryan didn't want to finish just yet, he wanted this moment to keep on. But he had to. He clenched, Horatio felt it, and came in his hand with a loud orgasm. Ryan panted and looked into his eyes. They kissed again softly. Horatio grabbed Ryan's hips, lifting him and laying him down on the couch.

Ryan wrapped his legs around Horatio, trying to pull him closer. Though it wasn't possible to be closer than they were now. Horatio pulled out slow, but pushed in roughly. Ryan's back arched up off of the couch as Horatio pounded into him. A slew of curses and words of encouragement came out of his mouth. Ryan gasped and tried to stop himself from scratching Horatio's back but he couldn't.

"H-Horatio, harder." He pleaded. "Please, fuck me harder."

And with a request like that, Horatio had to comply. Ryan captured Horatio's lips with his own and bit his bottom lip softly. Horatio felt himself becoming tense. He kept thrusting into Ryan until he felt he was close. Horatio pulled out of Ryan and started wanking himself vigorously. And then with a low groan, he came right onto Ryan's stomach.

Horatio looked down fondly to the man below him. Ryan was undone- his chest heaving with each breath he took. Ryan looked at Horatio with hooded eyes. They were still open, but he was so exhausted that they kept closing. He smiled weakly and sighed. "That was good. But I'm tired now."

Horatio chuckled and took Ryan's hand. "Well, let's get cleaned up and lay down in the bed."

"Hmm. Okay."

They both went into the bathroom. Horatio wet a washcloth and wiped them both off. When they were done, they retreated to his bedroom. Both men got under the blanket and closed their eyes. A short while later, Ryan felt arms wrapping around him. He pushed himself back against Horatio. Horatio hummed softly and Ryan smiled.


	10. More Drama

Ten

The next three weeks had gone by so fast that it was pretty much a blur.

The murders of Janice Lee, Gary Hall and Mitchell Stokes had come to a head. Natalia had figured out that the bracelet that was found in Janice's home belonged to Gary. His best friend confirmed that. Gary worked in a jewelry store and the bracelet was a new design he had someone make for him. The best friend said the bracelet was made, but was stolen a few days later right out of Gary's home and ended up in Janice's. It was never reported stolen, because Gary was sure he had just misplaced it.

They were all connected in a way, but how?

Mitchell and Gary were both strangled and then shot. But Janice suffered from blunt force trauma to the head. So why had the killer changed it up? What did those three have in common? Horatio Caine would find out.

Mr. Oliver had told them that Mitchell was cheating. But no one could identify the new mystery man to bring him into custody for questioning. Whoever had killed those three had an issue with them. But what was it? The lab just couldn't find the missing puzzle pieces.

The chip that was found on Mitchell was dusted for fingerprints and other DNA samples, but nothing came of it. Only Mitchell's DNA was on it. Dave had examined it and discovered Tom was right; it was some sort of tracking chip. But of course, the data was corrupted and they couldn't get anything off of it. Mr. Oliver had told them he had no idea why Mitchell had it. It made no sense.

And why had Mitchell gotten plastic surgery? When questioned, Mr. Oliver stated that he said it would make him feel better. So, of course he supported his boyfriend's decision. Though, even he had to admit it was a little odd that Mitchell looked a bit like the CSI, Ryan Wolfe. But he knew nothing about it.

Ryan was smiling a lot more. Everyone in the lab had noticed. He was even humming and singing to himself. Walter had asked Ryan who the lucky lady was because Ryan was obviously seeing someone. But Ryan dismissed it. There was no woman. And he considered himself to be the lucky one. For the last two weeks, he'd been seeing a certain redhead lieutenant.

They saw each other every other day. At first, Ryan was nervous about it, thinking Horatio would be annoyed with him always coming over. But days when Ryan didn't ask to come, Horatio would call him and ask to get together. He just couldn't say no. Horatio would make him dinner if he hadn't eaten beforehand. Occasionally, they'd order in and watch movies, cuddled close on the sofa. It was so much more than sex. Ryan just liked spending time with him. And he just hoped that Horatio felt the same way.

Though, they did have sex. A total of three times in those weeks. And every single time, it was absolutely amazing. The first time it was right after Horatio had cooked for him. Ryan was so happy that instead of doing the dishes, he suggested that Horatio did him instead. He was more than happy to oblige.

The second time, Horatio had initiated it. They were in bed, trying to sleep. At least, Ryan was trying to sleep. Horatio had other plans. Light touched turned into heavy petting until Horatio went down on him and then fucked him. Hard.

The third time wasn't full-on sex. Ryan was showering, getting ready for the day. Suddenly, Horatio was in the shower with him. He started by rubbing Ryan's nipple and even sucking on the bud gently. Ryan was moaning so erotically that it went straight to Horatio's groin. Ryan got on his knees in the shower, and sucked Horatio off. Even swallowing him down. And after, Horatio pulled Ryan back up. He pushed him against the wall, spread his legs and dropped down to eye lever with his hole.

Without hesitation, Horatio licked the rim. He continued to lick and nibble at the sensitive skin until Ryan's knees buckled and he came, shooting it on the tiled wall. They cleaned up and got ready for work.

Everything was just perfect. Ryan didn't want it to end. But all good thing came to an end, eventually.

He was cooking for Horatio. It was the first time he had and he was so nervous. Ryan wasn't much of a cook but he wanted to do something nice for Horatio since he always did for him. It was a simple dish- just spaghetti; the recipe Ryan had to look online for.

Dinner was served and Horatio was eager to try it. He knew he'd like anything Ryan made for him. Ryan set the two bowls of food on the table. But he paused. Horatio eyed his lover, wondering what was going on. "Ryan, are you okay?"

He smiled and nodded. "I'm okay. I just feel sick again."

Horatio was concerned. "Again? You've been sick for two weeks now. Has this happened before?"

"No, but I'm sure it'll pass. Don't worry about me." Ryan sat down and watched as Horatio ate a fork full of spaghetti. He smiled, which made Ryan smile, too. But suddenly, Ryan wasn't hungry anymore. He couldn't shake this nauseated feeling. Horatio ate, Ryan picked at his food.

After Horatio had fallen asleep, Ryan had rushed into the bathroom where he got sick and vomited. Something was wrong, Ryan knew it. He had a doctor's appointment the next day. But he didn't tell Horatio. He didn't want to worry him too much. Hopefully it was just a stomach virus. But a stomach virus didn't explain why Ryan's chest had started feeling tender. He was afraid and confused.

He already had an idea in his head of what was going on with him. But he was just wishing and hoping that it wasn't it. He'd looked it up online; male pregnancy. Though highly uncommon, it wasn't impossible. It just happened when a male was born with reproductive organs. At first, Ryan had dismissed that idea. He thought it was crazy. He'd been with guys before and he never had this scare. But until Horatio, he hadn't ever had unprotected sex with anyone. Ryan was mentally slapping himself. How could he have been so stupid, he thought. Though he couldn't blame himself too harshly. He hadn't even known it was possible.

Being in the doctor's office scared Ryan. He'd searched for hours, trying to find a hospital that specialized in male pregnancies. There was only one in the city and it was an hour drive away. Ryan even wore sunglasses, to disguise himself just in case he ran into someone he knew. Thankfully, he hadn't.

The doctor shook Ryan's hand and led him to a room in the back. He listened to his symptoms, wrote them down and then had him submit to a urine test. After waiting for what seemed like forever, which was actually only fifteen minutes, the results were in. Ryan braced himself for what he already knew.

"Well, Mr. Wolfe, you are pregnant. You're about six weeks along. Congratulations." The doctor told him. "I have pamphlets that you can take with you. Feel free to come back or call if you have any questions or concerns. But other than that, I want you to come back in two months just so we can make sure that everything is still okay; just a checkup." He continued.

Ryan nodded and sighed. "Okay. I have a question; how will I deliver the baby? And are there any health risks for me or for the baby?"

The doctor smiled. He'd heard these things a million times before. "The baby will be delivered via cesarean section. And despite pregnancy in males being highly uncommon, it's the same as a pregnancy with a woman. You'll go through the same things- tender breasts, cramping, morning sickness- it's inevitable. The only differences are that you are in fact, a man, and you'll deliver with a C-section." He told him.

Ryan didn't even realize he was crying until he felt something wet slide down his cheek and touch his lip. Quickly, he used his hand to wipe the tear. The good doctor gave Ryan a few tissues, Ryan smiled and chuckled softly as he accepted the tissue and wiped his face. It felt so surreal. He had a feeling but hearing it confirmed was completely different. He was pregnant. He was going to have a baby. It was his baby, and it was Horatio's.

"Are you okay, Mr. Wolfe?" The doctor asked gently. Ryan nodded and his smile elongated. "I'm going to have a baby." He answered. "I always wanted to have a child, but I didn't think it was ever going to happen. That timing is a little bad, but it's happening and I think I can make it work."

"So you're happy? That's great. I'm going to put this on your stomach and we'll be able to hear the heartbeat." The doctor tapped this long thing that Ryan thought looked like a stethoscope. He lifted his shirt and leaned back slightly. The doctor put it on his stomach and became very quiet.

Although he was happy to be having baby, Ryan was scared. Terrified, even. How would he explain this to people? How would they even react? When he started to show, doing simple things like going for a walk or going to the grocery store would garner a lot of attention. Definitely unwanted attention. He wouldn't be able to go out to crime scenes anymore. Being a CSI was what Ryan knew and loved doing. He couldn't even imagine having another job. It was scary to think about.

What would Horatio do when Ryan told him? He didn't think Horatio would believe him. He would probably think it was some weird joke Ryan was making. He never did understand his sense of humor.

But would Horatio be there for him? More importantly, would he be there for their baby? Ryan didn't really think Horatio would abandon his own child- he saw how great he was with Kyle. He knew he was probably just being paranoid but he couldn't help but to be scared. What if Horatio didn't want any more kids? Would he shun his and Ryan's? Well, Ryan wouldn't have known until he told him.

Ryan drove himself to his lover's house. He didn't even have to psyche himself up. He just knew that everything would be okay. Though, he did go over what he would say to Horatio.

He threw his car into park, hopped out and then ran to Horatio's door. He knocked frantically, not even letting up. His excitement was showing.

As he waited for Horatio to open the door, Ran glanced over to the side. There was a little red car in his driveway. It wasn't Horatio's car; his was blue. Unless he had gotten another one that Ryan didn't know about. The door opened and he turned his attention back to a shocked Horatio. He was still in his suit. Ryan smiled. "Do you own regular clothes?" He joked.

Horatio shook his head. "No," he said, "Um, Ryan, what are you doing here? Did I ask you to come over today?"

"I have big news that I have to tell you. I couldn't wait until tomorrow to tell you. Are you busy now?" Ryan asked. Horatio pursed his lips and then sighed. There was a loud clattering noise that made Horatio and Ryan look in the direction of it. It came from the kitchen, and since Ryan was outside he couldn't have seen it. Ryan shook his head. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you had company. I should have called first."

Horatio nodded. "It's okay. Can we talk tomorrow?"

Ryan smiled. "Bright and early, right?"

"Bright and early, Ryan."

Ryan turned on his heel and headed back to his car. He could wait another day to tell Horatio. That was okay, though. It gave him more time to think about what his options were now that he was having a baby.

After getting into the car, he stuck the key into the ignition to turn it on. Ryan turned to put his seatbelt on when he paused. Someone was staring at him; hard. It was a woman in Horatio's kitchen. That was odd, Ryan thought.


	11. Walter the Great

Eleven

Ryan stood in the lab, going over evidence again just to make sure he didn't miss anything. Although he knew that he didn't, it still didn't hurt to check. Walter hovered over him, watching him intently as he worked. Normally that would have made Ryan uncomfortable but for some reason, he was feeling pretty confident.

Walter sighed as Ryan told him there wasn't anything that he had missed. He even mumbled something about 'needing to catch this guy before he killed again'. Ryan agreed. With each day brought dread that this person could cause another body to turn up in the morgue.

Calleigh came rushing into the room. It was so sudden that it instantly struck fear into the two men. Did something bad happen? Was Calleigh okay? She shut the lab door and pulled Ryan by his arm. "We have to talk. You know the vic, Mitchell Stokes?"

Ryan nodded. Yes, he remembered him well. Everyone in the lab seemed to agree that this man looked like him. Even as Ryan eyed the man, he had to admit he did see a bit of resemblance. Not a lot. Mitchell's lips and eyes seemed like his own. But the nose was a little too big and his hair was a darker shade of brown that Ryan's.

"Well we were able to track down his plastic surgeon thanks to Mr. Oliver. Frank and I went to pay him a little visit and guess what?" She questioned. Ryan just wanted her to get on with it. Walter folded, and eagerly asked, "What? What happened?"

"We showed him a picture of you, Ryan. And he confirmed that Mitchell gave him a picture of you and asked the doctor to make him resemble you as much as possible." Calleigh gave him a small photograph. "This is his 'before' shot."

Ryan frowned. "This makes no sense. I don't know this guy at all. I don't know Mr. Oliver either."

"So if you don't know him, why did he want to look like you?" Calleigh crossed her arms.

"More importantly," Walter spoke, "how did he even get a picture of Ryan?"

Ryan was spooked and for good reason, too. This man that was murdered had specifically asked a plastic surgeon to look like him. He didn't even know this man. Maybe they had bumped into each other on the street before. But would that have been enough for Mitchell to stalk his life and try to be him? It was all just surreal. And it was scary; why was this man killed and who did it?

Natalia had even thrown out the possibility of it being an accident. Maybe killer had murdered Mitchell because he thought it was Ryan. That would have meant Ryan was potentially in danger. Although that still didn't explain how these murders were linked and now it involved him. Calleigh thought the assumption was just crazy. But Ryan couldn't just dismiss that theory. Not yet, anyways.

He didn't want to think about it but he had to. This case needed to be solved, not just because Ryan was possibly in danger. But now he had to factor in the possibility of his unborn baby being in danger, too. Not to mention the millions of civilians living in Miami were too. He was worried about himself, the baby and everybody else. Ryan didn't want to get hurt.

The surgeon was ruled out as a suspect for the time being. They didn't have any reason to think he was involved in any way of the crimes. He was just doing what people paid him to do. But after Horatio had questioned him more, he discovered something else.

"Wait, so Janice Lee was a patient of his?" Natalia asked. "What did she have done?"

Tom pulled back the sheet on the table to reveal her body. He pointed to her stomach. "Liposuction. Which is odd because she wasn't overweight. I'm guessing the pressure of being a cheerleader got to her."

"How sad." Natalia said. "Horatio says the surgeon admitted to working on her about a year ago, about three months before he started on Mitchell. So, you think this is how they're connected?"

Tom shrugged as he covered the body again. "Working here has taught me to expect the unexpected. Nothing surprises me anymore."

Natalia smiled sadly and walked away to leave the room. Tom stared at the blanket that covered the deceased. He sighed and shook his head. "Poor girl." He murmured.

Ryan watched Horatio in his office. He smiled at the sight of him. Even now after a month of sort of being together, he still felt the familiar fluttering in his belly. He took a deep breath and knocked. Horatio slowly turned his head to the door. Through the glass, he could clearly see Ryan standing there with a huge goofy grin on his face. He motioned for him to come in.

Ryan did and closed the door behind himself and tried to stop his smile. "Sorry if I'm interrupting something." He said. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

Earlier Ryan had sent Horatio two texts that went unanswered. Then on break, he tried calling him and it went straight to voicemail. He knew that may have been too excessive but damn it, Ryan had big news.

Horatio shifted in his chair. "I'm fine."

'Fine'. That normally meant that something was up and Horatio just didn't want to talk about it. He didn't want to pry, but he really wanted to know. "Are you sure? You know I'm always here if you want to talk. I've been told I'm a great listener." Ryan said.

"I'm sure."

He sighed. Obviously Horatio wasn't going to crack. "Okay," he answered, "well, are we meeting at my place or yours tonight? Or maybe we could go out for once. I know a few places."

Horatio stood up. "Actually tonight's not going to work for me."

Ryan suddenly had a sinking feeling in his chest. The flutters in his stomach were no longer gentle. But they were now rumbles filled with fear. Horatio was annoyed with him already. And it certainly didn't help that he showed up unexpectedly to his home last night and had maybe contacted him too many times today. And that woman that stared at him from the window- now Ryan was worried.

But he smiled, though he knew it looked forced. "Okay then. I guess I'll just see you at work tomorrow."

"Ryan, something is wrong." Horatio said suddenly. "But it's not appropriate to talk about here. Maybe I'll drop by tonight so we can talk."

He nodded and quickly made his way out of the room and rushed toward the elevator. Just his luck, Walter made his way in and stood right next to Ryan. He looked down to the shorter man and knew he was upset. "You good, Ryan?"

Ryan nodded. "Yeah. Hey, I have a question." Walter knew that Ryan was seeing someone, he just didn't know who it was. Maybe Ryan could confide in him. Really, he had no one else he could talk to. Now that Dave was out of his personal life he really didn't have friends. There was Eric but he'd make a joke out of it. "If you were seeing someone casually and you thought that they were seeing someone else, do you have a right to be upset over it? I mean, even though you're not exactly official or exclusive?"

Walter's eyebrows raised comically high. The elevator dinged and the two walked off. "Well, if I really liked the girl then yeah, I'd be upset. But I guess I'd have to tell her that we need to either be exclusive or not see each other anymore if I couldn't handle it. It would be hard, but a talk would have to be had about it before things got too serious." He explained.

Too serious, like a baby, Ryan thought. It was already too late for that. Just because he was pregnant didn't mean he should expect Horatio to define their relationship. Not once did they say they were exclusive. When Ryan said he wanted to be with him, Horatio couldn't agree to that because of the love he still had for Jesse.

Ryan didn't want Horatio to settle for him anyways. He had heard about couples that were only together solely for the sake of their kids. Most of those relationships ended terribly. Ryan didn't want to spend every aching moment arguing with Horatio and then eventually hating him. He knew that being together because they were having a baby was a bad idea and it wasn't fair to either of them. Especially if one of them was in love with someone else.

And now Horatio was coming over tonight to have a serious conversation. He was nervous. He didn't want this thing with him to end but he knew it would have to happen if that was what Horatio wanted. If it wasn't meant to be, then he certainly couldn't force it.

Ryan thanked Walter for the advice and they both set off in their opposite directions.


	12. Dave the Not-so Great

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible trigger warning for this chapter. Nothing tooooo bad, (maybe) but I have warned you anyways.  
> TW: attempted rape

Twelve

He had spent a long portion of his time cleaning. Ryan hadn't even realized that he did until he looked at the clock and saw that three hours had gone by.

Horatio had texted him some hours ago saying he had something to do tonight, but on his way back he would stop by Ryan's so they could talk. He said it wouldn't be until after 8pm. And now it was a little after seven o'clock.

Ryan put away his cleaning supplies, and then inspected his home room by room. Everything seemed clean. Of course, he knew that it had to have been since he had re-cleaned mot areas more than twice. He liked to clean and that was just how he relaxed. But after the cleaning, he himself felt dirty.

He set out some clothes to wear; casual since Horatio was coming over. And he couldn't just throw on a pair of pajamas. He didn't wear them- Ryan liked to sleep in his underwear. There was nothing wrong with that, but he didn't want to answer the door in his underwear. Although Horatio had seen him naked, it just didn't seem appropriate at the moment.

Ryan took a shower, he tried to make it quick but it ended up lasting thirty minutes. He rushed to put his clothes on and was just about to brush his hair when the doorbell rang. Brushing his hair would have to wait. Ryan dashed to the door and stopped. He couldn't just open it, then Horatio would think Ryan was anxiously for him. He was, but he didn't want him to know that.

Ryan opened the door and his heart dropped. I should have looked out of the peep hole, he thought.

Dave smiled. "Aren't you going to let me in?" He grabbed Ryan and embraced him in a tight hug. Ryan shook his head and pushed him off. "I missed you, Ryan."

He had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. "You're drunk. Go home."

"You would let me drive home?"

"Well how did you get here?" Ryan asked him.

Dave made his way past Ryan and started looking around. He chuckled before answering. "I walked. Let me tell you, the first three houses I went to were very angry people. I'm glad I finally found you."

This was so off. Ryan had never seen Dave this drunk before. They would go out and drink but Dave would always stop himself on his own accord. But now here he was, inside Ryan's home. Dave reeked of alcohol- not just his breath. But Ryan could smell it on his clothes. His speech slurred occasionally and he was stumbling. He could only imagine what Dave looked like walking three blocks to his house from the bar.

Ryan sighed and shut the door. "Okay, you can sit on the couch and I'll call you a taxi."

Dave sat down and pouted. "Why can't you take me home? Or just let me stay the night." He said. Ryan stared at the man in disbelief. He was already being nice to him. He let him sit when he definitely could have made him stand by the door. And he was nice enough to offer to call someone to pick him up, instead of letting him stumble all the way home.

"Dave, I want nothing to do with you. If I let you stay the night, then I'll be forced to look at your face in the morning." Ryan answered. "I'm calling a taxi so you can go home. Now you can wait inside and keep your mouth shut, or wait outside. I don't really care."

Dave sat back and crossed his arms. He didn't say anything else so Ryan picked up his phone and looked up numbers for a cab. H found one and dialed the number. When someone answered, Ryan gave his address and told him the end destination was. As Ryan was hanging up, he felt firm hands on his waist. He stilled and stood frozen in place.

Instantly, Ryan could smell the alcohol and already knew what Dave was doing. His grip tightened then Ryan felt lips on the back of his neck. "What are you doing?" Ryan asked, his voice suddenly going hoarse. He was surprised that happened. He was rarely ever at a loss words and his voice never strained before.

"You know what I'm doing," his voice was low. "I want you."

Ryan laughed awkwardly. "Oh no, that's not happening. You have to leave."

"Why?"

"I don't want you. And I need to be up in the morning early, so I need you to wait outside." Ryan said.

Dave's grip tightened even more and Ryan was in pain. His nails were digging into his skin even through his shirt. Just as he opened his mouth to talk, a hand covered it. "Just be quiet." Ryan began shaking his head no and tried to use his fingers to pry Dave's hands off of him.

Dave let go of Ryan's mouth and waist, then turned him to face him. When he saw Ryan's face, he smiled. "Are you turned on?"

His eyes widened and then his whole face twisted. "No, I would never be turned on by someone like you. Why don't you just leave?" Ryan snapped. Dave narrowed his eyes and before Ryan could even register what was happening, he was pushed forcefully down onto the couch and Dave crawled on top of him.

Horatio sighed and put his head back on the headrest of the car. He was doing the right thing, he told himself. This had to be done. Grabbing his cellphone, he sent a text to Ryan to let him know he was outside. Headlights shined brightly behind him. Adjusting his eyes to the new intrusion, he saw a taxi. Why did Ryan call a taxi; is something wrong with his car? Horatio turned his car off and got out. The window to the taxi rolled down and the guy inside yelled to him.

"Hey man, are you going in there? Can you tell that 'Ryan' guy that his taxi is here?" He said.

So Ryan did call a taxi. Horatio told him he would, and made his way to the front door. He knocked three times and waited. While waiting, he heard a sound of a man yell in pain, something glass breaking and then shuffling from Ryan's home. Horatio began knocking on the door louder, this time yelling Ryan's name.

The door swung open and Dave ran past him, seemingly holding his own groin. He ran to the taxi, opened the door, fell inside and closed the door as it sped off. Horatio almost ran after him, but he heard Ryan's soft voice say his name. He went inside the house. Inside, Ryan was staring blankly at the broken glass table in front of him. Horatio walked in slowly, pulling the door to make sure it didn't slam shut. "Ryan, what happened?"

He shrugged. "Nothing."

"I see Dave running out of the house, a broken table and your shirt is ripped." Horatio answered. "It doesn't seem like 'nothing' happened."

Ryan stared hard at Horatio. He narrowed his eyes at him. "What are you trying to say?"

"I'm just saying that something happened, Ryan." He said as gently as he could. Horatio observed him; Ryan had four small brownish-purple looking bruises on his neck with bite marks on each. His shirt was ripped open and his hair was disheveled.

Ryan glared at Horatio. "I haven't done anything wrong."

"I'm not saying you did."

"He just showed up here," Ryan said softly. "He was so drunk. I have to clean this up." Ryan stood and Horatio watched him as he disappeared into another room. He heard a click of a door opening, some movement, the door shut and Ryan returned. He carried a broom, dust pan and had gloves in his hands. Ryan put the gloves on and started for the broken glass.

Horatio kept trying to get his attention, even telling him that he should put on some type of protection for his feet from the glass. But he wouldn't listen or acknowledge that Horatio was even there. Obviously something had happened. Something that Ryan didn't want to talk about. But Horatio couldn't help but to wonder. "Why was Dave here?"

Ryan shrugged again, still sweeping and picking up the pieces of glass. "He was drunk and I didn't want him to wander around the streets and get hurt. So I called a taxi for him and allowed him to wait here for it."

"Talk to me; what happened? I see the hickeys on your neck." Horatio said. Ryan continued sweeping. "Your shirt is ripped open, too. Please just talk to me."

There was silence. Then laughing. Ryan was laughing. He finished picking up the glass pieces and then finally looked at Horatio. "Why are you here, Horatio? You wanted to talk, so do it. I don't have time to just sit here and socialize."

Horatio was taken back. The only other time Ryan was this hostile toward him was the night they first hooked up. "I just want to make sure you're okay. What I wanted doesn't matter right now."

"No, I know what you want to say. You want to end this- us; whatever the hell we are." Ryan answered. "So just do it already and put me out of my misery."

"What are you—"

"You should have told me first that you wanted to see other people. I would have understood, Horatio. We never defined what we are but you could have told me I wasn't the only one." Ryan said.

Horatio was eerily silent. He shuddered at the mere thought of Dave being inside Ryan's house. And the thought of him touching Ryan in any way sparked a flame of anger inside of him. He understood that Ryan liked to help people, and he couldn't fault him for that. But hopefully, he would be more cautious with Dave. And what was he talking about? I never thought of ending things with Ryan, he thought.

Ryan was crying. Hard.

Sure, the situation with Dave was bad. Horatio felt jealous that he was even here in the first place. Only because that he knew about Ryan and Dave. And he saw that kiss at the bar. It hit him hard. And when he showed up and saw Dave, he felt angry and jealous because of that. They hadn't defined their relationship. What was the relationship? And besides, just the day before he himself was with a woman. They didn't sleep together but Ryan didn't know that. He was under the impression that they did.

They didn't sleep together, but Horatio had that intention. But he couldn't. Because the moment his lips connected with hers, all he could think of was Ryan.

The way his face flushed whenever he caught Horatio staring at him. The way his lips felt with his; they seemed to form perfectly with his own. Also, the way Ryan would look at him. It was so genuine that Horatio couldn't deny he just wanted to smile every time Ryan did. Why would Horatio give that up just to have a one-night stand with some woman?

He reached out for Ryan, who jerked himself out of his grasp. Ryan shook his head furiously, just crying and whispering how sorry he was for letting Dave into the house. Though, Horatio didn't fault him for that. He could barely make out what Ryan was saying. He heard the sad "sorry's" and the angry "why do you need her when you have me" and even the "I swear, I don't want Dave". All of which, broke Horatio's heart.

"Ryan, look at me." Horatio said, soft but stern. Ryan shook his head again, only burying his face into his hands. Horatio sighed and repeated himself. "Look at me." Ryan did. "I believe you. You don't want Dave, he just came over- I believe it. Don't be sorry about that. It wasn't your fault. I'm just upset that this happened to you."

Ryan stared at him. His mouth was opened slightly and wavering as if he was trying to speak but the words weren't coming out. Ryan swallowed hard. "I'm sorry."

"Stop that, you have nothing to be sorry for." Horatio said.

He wasn't getting it, Ryan thought. Of course he wasn't getting it. I haven't told him yet. I'm just crying. Ryan sniffled a few more times and took a deep breath to calm himself down. "Horatio, I'm sorry. I love you." He told him. Horatio began to speak but he was cut off. "I'm pregnant."

Horatio tilted his head and watched Ryan for any hint of a smile. Maybe it was just an odd joke. If this was said during a normal conversation and not after something emotional, he might have believed that. But the way he was crying and the way he looked at him with those sincere eyes- Ryan was not joking. He was completely serious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made Dave so bad, even though I actually really like his character in the show


	13. A Chance

Thirteen text!

Ryan jerked himself awake in panic. He'd had a very terrible nightmare that involved Dave. He breathed in and out deeply and shook his head, trying to rid himself of those thoughts. He closed his eyes, took a few more deep breaths and then relaxed. Everything was okay. He was okay. Things were fine.

Ryan looked over to the empty mattress space net to him. The sun was shining brightly and lit up the yellow post-it note on the pillow. He picked it up and read it; a note from Horatio.

_**Ryan, I left to get ready for work. You should stay home and get some rest. I'll call you when I'm off. Horatio**_.

An off day? That was rare for the CSI. It was funny; he had planned for his first day off in weeks. He had decided that he would go out to pick up a few things for the house and clean up more. But now he needed to 'relax'. Relaxing wasn't something Ryan Wolfe was used to. Since Horatio suggested it, probably as his boss, he should really listen to him. He usually knew what was best. Besides, he didn't want to run into Dave today. If he had even gone into work anyways. What if he didn't? What if h came back to Ryan's house? Surely, he was still angry about last night.

After he had pushed him back onto the couch, Dave had started kissing Ryan all over. Of course Ryan kept telling him to stop but he just wouldn't listen. He even stilled as Dave began biting his neck. Ryan didn't want to jerk away from someone that had their teeth in his neck.

Ryan didn't fight it; that is until Dave ripped his shirt and bean unbuttoning his pants. At that moment, Ryan began pushing and shoving him. Although Dave was just a lab tech, he was a lot stronger than he looked. He told Ryan to just "let it happen". Reality of the situation set in, and having no other choice, Ryan kneed him in the groin as hard as he could. Dave yelled out in pain, grabbing himself. Ryan too the opportunity to push him off, unfortunately he fell on the glass table in front of the couch.

He heard pounding on the door and suddenly remembered that Horatio was coming over. He was there, yelling for Ryan. Dave after hearing the lieutenant's voice became visibly panicked. He tried to straighten himself out as well as he could and fled from the home.

Ryan was glad that Horatio showed up when he did. He honestly had no idea what would have happened if he didn't. And frankly, he didn't even want to think about what would or could have happened.

After cleaning up the broken glass in silence, Horatio finally asked him. Was he serious when he said he was pregnant? Ryan nodded his head yes slowly then began rambling on about how unbelievable it was, but it was real. He even told Horatio that he didn't have to be in his life if he didn't want to be. Ryan was surprised to see how shocked he looked at that.

"Ryan, I will be here for you and I will be here for this baby. You know I will." He told him. Of course he should have known that Horatio wouldn't abandon them. It wasn't in his character to do that. But Ryan was just scared of the future. He had no idea of what to expect. And Horatio had taken the news surprisingly well. Ryan was glad. He couldn't control it; he lunged at Horatio and embraced him tightly.

Horatio rubbed Ryan's back as a way of comforting him. And then they shared a kiss. After making sure that the door was locked, they retreated to Ryan's bedroom where they just laid together in silence. They kissed and made out a few times but other than that, the silence was comforting. Horatio fell asleep with his arms around Ryan. His hands rested firmly on the younger man's stomach. And Ryan had to smile. But he wondered about that woman that was over Horatio's house. He wanted to ask and figure out the situation- what now since they were having a baby? But he didn't want to ruin the moment.

Maybe he'd ask him today.

Ryan made his way through the house, looking around. He still felt a little on edge since the whole thing with Dave. And so he was just being cautious, although he knew it was probably actually paranoia. Horatio was right. Ryan needed to relax.

He made himself a small breakfast, and instantly felt better as he only gagged twice this morning. After breakfast, he took a bath and then settled himself in front of the television. Soon, he received a few text messages. Horatio must have told the others in the lab that he was sick because Walter and Calleigh both sent him messages respectively. Walter's read: 'Heard u were sick. Will fill u in on the case tomorrow'. Calleigh's message said 'feel better Ryan. Let me know if you need anything'. She had always been a good friend to him.

He almost put his phone away when he noticed a notification. Another message, this time it was from Horatio.

_**'How are you feeling?'** _

_**'A little nauseated. Other than that I'm good'.** _

_**'Good. I'd like you to with you to your next doctor's appointment'.** _

Then another one came in.

_**'If you don't mind, of course'.** _

Ryan grinned to himself. Of course Horatio could come. He was the father; well, one of them. Ryan was just glad that he wanted to share in this experience together. Ryan typed out his reply that he could. Then he received back 'great. Will stop by after work to talk'.

He put his phone away. Now he was worried again. He knew he shouldn't be, because Horatio wouldn't do anything to upset or hurt him- well, not purposely. But he couldn't shake this feeling. Obviously something had happened. And it had to have been bad if Horatio really felt the need to discuss it. They couldn't talk about it last night, since something unexpectedly happened that somewhat prevented them from taking about what had Horatio so upset the day before.

And not to mention the woman from his house again. Just the way she looked at Ryan was unnerving. Like she knew something he didn't. And he didn't like that at all. He was determined to get to the bottom of it. Though, of course he had to wait until he spoke to Horatio.

He observed himself in the mirror. He wasn't showing yet, although Ryan knew it was too early on in the pregnancy. But he was kind of hoping he would be. He was having a baby. And he was excited. But maybe the longer it too for his baby bump to show the longer he had to find a way to explain this to everyone.

How would people in the lab react to the news? Walter would be in shock, but he'd probably make a joke out of it. Calleigh and Natalia would be skeptical and would ask Ryan a lot of personal questions like how it happened, and who the father was. But that was to be expected. How would Kyle react? Ryan knew him but not enough to figure out how he would take the news. Dave would be extremely upset but Ryan didn't care about how he'd take it.

He couldn't shake this feeling about Eric. He and Delko had always had a rocky relation. It was up and then it was down. It was left and then it was right. They had spats and arguments every now and then like every other person, but they were still friends at the end of the day. But this would probably be too much for Eric to handle. Ryan didn't know why, but he couldn't shake it. He just knew Eric wouldn't take this well. Horatio had been married to his sister, Marisol. And he'd have to tell him that Horatio was the father. So not only was he announcing his pregnancy, but he was also 'coming out' to him and he was outing Horatio as well. It would be a major shock to learn that he and Ryan had been sleeping together and were having baby.

When work was done, Horatio came right over just like he said he would. Ryan opened the door for him. He almost threw his arms around him with gratitude when he saw Horatio had food in his hands. "Please tell me that's for me?" Ryan questioned.

Horatio chuckled and nodded. "It is. I thought you might be hungry." He then eyed Ryan skeptically. "You can eat this right; you're not too nauseated, right?"

Ryan grabbed the bag of fast food and shook his head no. "I feel much better, I think I'll be okay. But this whole morning sickness thing is no joke." He smiled. Horatio did too, but it wasn't his usual happy smile. It was the one he gave when something was wrong. Ryan had almost forgotten that Horatio wanted to speak to him seriously.

"Well, why don't we eat first and then we can talk. Have a seat." Ryan said.

Horatio sat down on the couch but he shrugged. "No, I want to say this now."

"Does this have anything to do with the woman at your house?"

"She is a part of it, yes." Horatio nodded.

Ryan crossed his arms. "Are you dating her?" He asked.

"Ryan," Horatio answered slowly, "why don't you sit and let me tell you what I came to? After, you can ask me questions if you'd like."

Wordlessly, Ryan sat down next to him and turned to face him. Horatio pursed his lips together and scrunched his eyebrows, as if something was troubling him. Ryan was going to say something, but he decided not to and would just remain quiet.

"You know, I have loved Jesse for a very long time. Unfortunately, I was never brave enough to confess that to him. I think that's why his death had taken a very big toll on me." Horatio said. "After he moved, I guess I pushed aside my feelings for him and I fell for Marisol. I never expected to, but I did and so fast, too. Then, she passed away and I was alone again. Then, Jesse came back and so did my feelings for him."

"But of course I couldn't tell him. I was too afraid of rejection. But then, Ryan, I started seeing you in a different way. And I knew I liked you. I didn't know you liked me, too tough. When you told me you did it was quite a shock. Actually when you told me you loved me, it scared me."

Ryan remained silent. He was watching Horatio as he spoke. He looked in his eyes, but Horatio wouldn't look at him. He looked at everything in the room but Ryan.

"I loved Marisol, and she was shot. I loved Yelina but she loved my brother. I loved Jesse but he was killed, too. I cared deeply for Julia, but the end of our relationship was my own fault. She was deeply disturbed after that. It seems like something happens to everybody I care about. And that's a scary thought; if something bad happened to you I wouldn't know what to do with myself. So, I guess, I couldn't let myself have deep feelings for you."

"And when I started to, I met this woman at the bar. She was very nice, very charming. We spoke for a while, I bought her a drink or two. We exchanged contact information and we decided to get together again. She came back to my place, but then you showed up and you were so excited to tell me something. After you left, she and I kissed but it just didn't feel right."

Ryan sighed. "Do you think you would have gone farther than that if I hadn't shown up and killed the mood?"

Horatio quickly shook his head. "You didn't ruin any 'mood'. I came to my senses. It just didn't feel right. If you hadn't shown up I still would have realized how wrong it felt to be with her."

"So does it 'feel right' when you're with me?" Ryan asked.

"Yes, it does actually. And I realized the reason why was because I really like you. I could never just sleep with someone without some feelings involved. You care a lot for me and I don't want to hurt you in that way." Horatio told him. "And when I saw Dave here and I knew what he tried to do with you, I wanted to physically hurt him. And then arrest him, but I can't because you won't press charges, against my better judgement."

"Horatio—"

"Anyways, I felt the need to protect you. I know you can take care of yourself but it doesn't hurt to have someone else looking out for you outside of the lab. I was shocked when you told me that you were, well, with child. But I'm happy that you are. I'm glad we have a baby on the way. Aren't you?" Horatio asked him. Ryan smiled. "Of course. I'm worried about my future as a CSI, and what people will say. But I'm happy this is happening."

"Me too. So, what I'm saying to you is that I want to try." Horatio smiled. "I want us to be together. I want us to be a family. I don't want us to be with anyone else. I'm afraid of something happening to you or the baby, but as long as I'm here I will be here for and protect the both of you. What do you say?"

Ryan smiled. "Well, I'm starving so I say let's eat." He answered. "Oh, and yea, I think we go together pretty well."

"Me too. Let's eat." He chuckled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still learning how to format correctly on this site so if anything looks wrong, I'm sorry!


	14. Kyle

Fourteen

Ryan stared at himself in the mirror. He grimaced as he poked his stomach. "I'm getting fat!" He announced.

He heard laughter coming from the next room. "You're not fat. You have a baby inside of you."

"Well, this baby is making me look fat." Ryan said. "Seriously, Horatio, I'm only four months along; I shouldn't be this big. These big shirts aren't going to conceal the fact that I'm pregnant for much longer."

There was silence, so Ryan left the bathroom and went into Horatio's bedroom. The man sat at the edge of the bed. He smiled when he saw Ryan. "You okay?" Ryan asked him.

"I'm thinking we should just tell people." Horatio explained. "Our friends would be very happy for us, Ryan. Let's tell them so you won't have to keep wearing shirts that are entirely way too big for you."

Ryan groaned. "No, I'm not ready. We already discussed this- we're telling Kyle tonight and I'm meeting with Alexx tomorrow for lunch so I'll tell her then. But that's it. For now, at least."

"What about Calleigh? We can trust her."

"Horatio please, can we drop this? I don't want to be stressed." Ryan said.

Horatio nodded and stopped speaking. Just last week at Ryan's doctor's appointment, the doctor had explicitly expressed how bad stress would affect the baby. And Ryan had been stressed lately. He kept thinking about Dave and trying to avoid him completely. He kept thinking about how much this pregnancy would affect not only him and Horatio, but everyone they worked with too. Of course, Horatio thought he was overreacting but Ryan couldn't help it.

And now because of doctor's orders, he had to stay out of stressful situations and conversations. Since Ryan was a CSI, stress came with a lot of the cases. So it was to the point where if the cases became too hard for him to handle, Ryan had to let someone else take over for him. That caused some concerns in the lab. People were becoming worried about Ryan. Even Stetler had come down and talked to him and Horatio about what was going on. They didn't tell him, though. Horatio just told him that Ryan would be back to his self 'sooner or later'.

Horatio took Ryan's hand in his. "Why don't you lay down and relax?"

Ryan nodded and crawled into the bed, lying on his side. He wasn't too surprised when he felt the bed dip and Horatio getting on, too. But he was surprised when he felt lips touching his neck. "What are you doing?" He asked.

"I'm helping you relax."

"No, I mean why?"

"I don't understand your question." Horatio told him. Ryan had been feeling a little down about himself lately. He was getting bigger and the baby wasn't even done growing yet. He was going to balloon up and he didn't want that. He was constantly complaining about not wanting to move and to just lay in bed all day and eat fast food. Horatio didn't like that Ryan felt that way. He wanted him to feel the exact opposite.

He turned Ryan so that he was lying on his back. Then Horatio slowly crawled on top of Ryan, careful not to crush his stomach. He quickly kissed him on the lips and then swiftly dipped down to Ryan's stomach. He raised his shirt and kissed his stomach, too. "You look so good, Ryan."

Ryan smiled. "Really; I do?"

He was only wearing sweatpants and a white shirt. He hardly thought he looked good. But he knew that Horatio was always honest with him and so he had to believe him. Horatio placed another kiss to the man's stomach. "You do. You look so unbelievably good right now."

Horatio slid his hands up Ryan's body, resting them on his chest. He began to massage and pinch at his nipples. He started kissing Ryan passionately as the younger man wrapped his arms around him. His fingers made way into the soft red hair. Horatio smiled into the kiss. Ryan seemed to like playing with his hair. He'd noticed the last few times they kissed or were intimate, Ryan would run his fingers through his hair. Not that Horatio minded, of course. He liked the feeling. He had to pry his lips away- he just loved the feeling when he and Ryan kissed. But he needed to move on; Kyle would be coming over in an hour and he wanted them to have time to shower before he did.

He looked to Ryan, who was anxiously biting his bottom lip. Horatio smiled. "Take off your clothes."

Ryan couldn't get his shirt off fast enough. Though when he did, he frowned. "Horatio, can you take your shirt off, too? I'm feeling a little self-conscious." He admitted. Horatio complied with the request. He unbuttoned the shirt he wore completely and shed it off. Both men's shirts went into a small pile on the floor. Ryan smiled. "Thank you."

He lifted himself off the bed in order to get his sweatpants off. Horatio helped him slide them down and tossed it into the pile. He chuckled at the man below him. "You're not wearing underwear," he said. "Were you anticipating this?"

"No; more like hoping." Ryan admitted. Horatio kissed him again on the lips, then trailed the kisses down his body. Stopping on his stomach, he kissed it three times before going lower. Horatio gave two small, quick licks to Ryan's awakening cock before engulfing it completely into his mouth. Ryan moaned and gripped the man by his hair. Horatio's tongue swirled the head of his cock and then took him in completely again.

This pattern continued on, Ryan moaning and telling Horatio how good it felt. He let go of his hair in fear that he'd accidentally pull it out. Instead, his hands held on tightly to the bedsheets. Horatio stopped sucking him and removed his mouth, purposely making a soft 'pop' noise. He opened his bedside table and grabbed a bottle of the lube Ryan had bought for them. He liked trying different kinds to see what he liked best.

Horatio coated two fingers with the substance, and made his way down to Ryan's hole. He inserted them slowly, loving the long groan that came out of Ryan as he did so. Ryan's eyes closed tightly and he pulled on the bedsheets, causing them to come undone from the bed. "Move. Now." He demanded. Horatio pumped his fingers inside of Ryan, paying attention to his reactions.

He gave soft moans of content when Horatio slid his fingers in and out. When Horatio began moving them in a scissoring motion, Ryan made a gasping noise and began breathing heavily. But when Horatio twisted his fingers inside of him, brushing against his prostate, Ryan's eyes opened, he moaned Horatio's name loudly and arched his back off the bed.

Horatio moved to kiss Ryan deeply, drowning out the sounds of Ryan's moaning and panting. Instead they turned into muffled whines and whimpers. He continued to thrust his fingers inside of Ryan, twisting and scissoring them occasionally. Ryan started to touch himself, rubbing his cock until he felt the familiar tension in his lower body.

Ryan's noises became frequent, so Horatio knew he was close. He moved his fingers faster to help. Ryan tensed below him and he kissed him harshly; the kiss was wet, full of tongue and a little bit of teeth. Horatio pulled away to and saw that Ryan had cum onto his own stomach. Ryan smiled and chuckled. "I feel better; thanks."

"I'm glad." Horatio placed another kiss to Ryan, whose smile faltered and now looked troubled. "Horatio, you didn't touch yourself?"

"No, I was concentrating on you." He told him. Ryan was happy to have him. The last 2 and a half months they were together as a couple and it was perfect. Although he had insisted otherwise, Horatio had been taking care of Ryan. He made sure that Ryan ate properly; he asked him to promise to cut out fast food after he'd read an article about it being terrible for the baby. He practically cooked for Ryan every night. Ryan was having issues with his body- Horatio always cheered him up. He even took Ryan to his last doctor's appointment. Horatio had held his hand the entire time.

"Well since you were so good at taking care of me just now," Ryan said, "I'll take care of you. Lay down."

Horatio did as he was told. Ryan unbuttoned and unzipped Horatio's pants, and started to stroke him. He watched his face; his eyes were closed and he could see his chest expanding and retracting with each deep breath. Ryan didn't miss when he'd cum eventually, Horatio let out a strangled groan as he grabbed Ryan's free hand. When he was finished, Ryan kissed him. "I love you."

Horatio opened his eyes and smiled. "Hmm," he hummed. "Let's take a shower before Kyle gets here."

Ryan took his hand as he led him into the bathroom.

He didn't mind that Horatio didn't say that he loved him back. Ryan knew that his feelings weren't quite there yet, and he definitely didn't want Horatio to say it if he didn't mean it. He wanted those three words to have meaning to Horatio. Ryan told Horatio he loved him because he did. He was okay with knowing that Horatio wasn't ready to say it back. Though, of course he hoped it would be soon.

Ryan was drying his hair with a towel when the doorbell rang. Horatio noticed the full-blown look of panic that painted Ryan's face. He placed a kiss to his forehead and squeezed his hand. "It'll be okay; I'm here." He told him. "Why don't you go sit down over there and try to relax?"

Ryan threw his towel in the nearby clothes hamper and made his way to the couch. Horatio opened the front door to see a very happy looking Kyle. "Hey dad! I'm glad you called. It's kind of boring at home." Kyle stepped inside the home and took his jacket off.

"Good to see you, Kyle. I'll hang your jacket in the closet and you can go get settled in the living room." Horatio told him. Kyle handed off his jacket and made his way into the other room. He was surprised to see Ryan there. They hadn't seen each other since the incident at the bar months ago.

Kyle sat down on a nearby chair. "Hey Ryan; I didn't know you would be here." He said. Ryan nodded and opened his mouth to speak, but Horatio had come into the room and beat him to it. "Ryan will be joining us tonight." He sat on the couch right next to Ryan. Kyle thought it was odd for him to sit so close to the other, but obviously the two were friends so it was okay. "I hope that's alright."

Kyle nodded. "Of course it's alright. So what's the plan?"

Horatio hadn't really thought about what they would do. His mindset was on telling Kyle and him and Ryan. But he didn't want to just jump right into it, he wanted to casually bring it up. Well, as casually as he could.

"Well, we can get food. Are you hungry?" Ryan asked. "We can order something."

Ryan was always hungry these days. He had just eaten a few hours ago. But they had expected that to happen. "Ryan, no fast food." Horatio warned.

"Oh, right I forgot. Fast food has been making me sick lately." Ryan told Kyle. He smiled and shrugged. "I'm not hungry anyways. Why don't we go out and do something? There's a pool hall we can go to."

Pool halls had drinkers and smoker. Ryan should not be around cigarette smoke while pregnant. He looked to Horatio, who seemed to confirm his thoughts by shaking his head no. Maybe they should just tell him and get it over with.

"So, Kyle are you seeing anyone? Do you have a girlfriend?" Ryan asked, trying to break the ice.

Kyle's face flushed as he smiled and said no. "No, no girlfriend. Not yet anyways. But there is a girl I like but honestly I'm afraid of asking her out."

"But Kyle you have to take that chance. You don't want to spend your life wondering 'what if'. Just ask her out, she might surprise you and say yes and you never know- you could get yourself a girlfriend." Ryan told him. Kyle seemed to be thinking about what he said. "I guess you're right. Maybe I will."

Ryan spoke from experience. If he hadn't taken chances, he wouldn't have become an officer, then a CSI. He wouldn't have had this relationship with Horatio. He wouldn't be having baby. He was glad he took chances.

"Kyle, I have something I need to tell you." Horatio told him. Kyle stared, expectantly. Even shooting Ryan a worried glance. "What is it? Is something wrong, dad?"

Horatio saw that Ryan was twiddled his thumbs, not making eye contact with either of the men. He gave him a reassuring pat on the thigh, which didn't go unnoticed by Kyle. "Well, Ryan and I have been dating."

Kyle scrunched up his face. Didn't see that one coming. Horatio's eyes remained on him. Ryan occasionally glanced up to Kyle but not directly. "Um. That's cool, I guess." This was more awkward than the time he saw Ryan at the bar. Suddenly Kyle shot out of his seat and stared accusingly at Ryan. "Wait a minute, that's why dad got so upset when he saw you and Dave together," he exclaimed, "you two were seeing each other and you kissed another guy!"

Ryan frantically shook his head. "No, that's not it at all. I wouldn't do that"

Horatio stood and made his way to Kyle, touching his shoulder. "Calm down, Kyle. Ryan and I were not together at the time. I was upset because, well, I was jealous."

Kyle nodded. "Oh. Sorry." He chuckled softly and sat back down. "Okay, so you're dating. What about that Dave guy?"

"Well, he and I are over. I'm much happier with Horatio." Ryan said. Horatio smiled at the confession as he sat back down. That too, didn't go unnoticed by Kyle. As long as his dad was happy he couldn't object. It was a shock to know his dad liked other men, but Kyle liked Ryan. He seemed like a good guy. "Alright, as long as you're happy."

Ryan looked up at Horatio, but seemed concerned. Kyle saw him move his hand over his stomach and rub it slightly, a habit Horatio noticed he'd picked up the last few weeks. Kyle wondered if Ryan had an upset stomach. "Well that's not all we need to tell you." Ryan said. Horatio sighed and fought for the right words to say. There was no possible way to ease him into this.

"Kyle, Ryan is pregnant."

Just rip the band aid off.

There was pure silence. No one said anything. Frankly, Ryan was too afraid to speak. Horatio wanted Kyle to say something. Kyle was too shocked to speak. Then he smiled and laughed. "Oh, I get it. That's a weird joke." Horatio loved puns, so surely this was a weird joke they were playing on Kyle. He kept watching Ryan, though. Kyle did notice that his hand was still on his stomach and his shirt was too big for him. He could also see he was a little bit bigger than last time. Obviously, Kyle wasn't going to say anything about that though. But every one gained weight. "This is a joke, right? I mean, it has to be. There's no way Ryan is pregnant." He went on. "It's kind of funny, but not your best work, dad."

Ryan rolled his eyes as he stood, his emotions getting the better of him. His hands gripped the hem of his shirt and pulled it up to expose his stomach. "Look, there's a baby in there. I know it's hard to believe, Kyle, but it's true. I am pregnant." He announced. Kyle couldn't take his eyes off of Ryan's stomach. Yep, Ryan is definitely bigger. But a baby? It was just hard to believe.

"I have to go to the bathroom." Kyle rushed out of the room and up the stairs. The two men heard a door slam shut. Ryan released his shirt and shook his head. "That didn't go well."

"You probably didn't need to lift your shirt," Horatio stifled his laughter. "But he's just surprised. Give him a while and it'll be okay." Horatio wrapped his arms around Ryan. He hoped it would be okay. This was why he was afraid of telling their friends.


	15. Alexx and the return of Dave

Fifteen

"Thanks so much for taking me out to lunch, Ryan." Alexx Woods told him. "I really missed you, so I'm glad you called.

Ryan smiled at his friend. They were at a café right up the street from the hospital where she worked. Her lunch break was only thirty minutes long, having only ten minutes left of it. The two had already eaten and were now just sitting and catching up before she had to get back to work.

Alexx was a kind woman. Every time Ryan spoke, she would listen intently to everything he said. He couldn't even ask her what was new in her life, because Alexx was only interested in talking about him. They wrapped up their conversation, and placed the money for the bill on the table. Then they hugged, with Alexx being careful to not hug too tightly.

When they pulled away from the hug, she placed her hand on his stomach. She took it off just as quickly, to not draw attention to the two. "My baby is having a baby." She said. "I'm so happy for you. You and Horatio have to let me have a baby shower for you guys."

Ryan nodded. "I'm sure that would be great. But remember, don't tell anyone yet."

"Of course. So, when are you going to tell the others? Hopefully not when you're about to go into labor, Ryan." She warned. Knowing Ryan, Alexx knew that was probably something he would do. He shook his head, though. He would tell his friends soon. He was just scared. But of course he told Alexx. Trusted her with any and everything. Ryan walked Alexx to her car. She waved to him and drove out of the parking garage.

He continued on, whistling and walking to his car. He stopped once to text Horatio to tell him how it went. As they both had expected, it went well.

When Ryan sat down at the table, Alexx smiled largely at him. She was so excited to see him. Ryan grimaced and put his hand over his mouth to conceal a burp. He smiled sheepishly. "Sorry about that" He told her. She nodded accepting to him. "That's okay. You look good, Ryan." She answered. "It's different; you're practically glowing."

Ryan smiled and shook his head. "No way, really?"

She nodded and eyed his clothes. She noticed that the suit Ryan was wearing looked a little snug on his body. Not a lot, and not completely noticeable to everyone else. But since she knew him, and was trained to pay attention to detail, she did notice. "Have you been nauseated lately? Or craving food more these days?"

Ryan's smile faltered. Alexx was a medical examiner and now she worked in the hospital. Of course she would notice. Ryan hadn't even noticed he put his hand on his stomach; it was just a habit. Alexx's face lit up. She gasped and both her hands covered her face. "Ryan, you're pregnant? That's great, baby. Oh my gosh, by who?" Her face changed to worry. "It's not Dave, is it?"

Ryan trusted her with everything. It was natural that he told her about Dave. She even knew about his feelings for Horatio. "No, actually," he smiled. "Horatio and I have been dating. And he is the one I'm having this baby with." Alexx was ecstatic. She was so happy for him.

Ryan continued on toward his car. He put his phone away and looked up. He got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. He stopped walking and just stood there, staring at his car. Or actually, the person sitting on his car hood.

Dave sat there, waiting for him. He was already looking at Ryan, so he couldn't sneak away. Ryan looked around the parking garage; no one else was around. Dave smiled.

"Hey Ryan." He said. "We have to talk."

That snapped Ryan out of his trance. "No, we don't. We have nothing to talk about. So just get away from my car."

"Let's just have a cup of coffee together and talk. I promise it won't take long." Dave hopped off the car and was now walking to Ryan. Ryan in turn, backed away, but he had already reached him. He took Ryan's hand. "I just want to talk. And we're in a public place, so it's not like I'm planning on doing something bad."

Ryan retracted his hand. "I have nothing to say to you."

"Then, I'll talk and you listen. Stop being so damn stubborn." Dave took his hand again and pulled Ryan back toward the way of the café. Ryan reluctantly let his feet follow. Whatever Dave had to say to him had better have been good.

Dave led him to the front counter of the café. He ordered a latte for himself and a black coffee for Ryan. He remembered what type I like, he thought. Dave handed his the cup and they both made their way to a table outside. The seats Ryan was with Alexx in were not occupied. So, he and Dave sat at the last open table; it faced the sidewalk and the street.

"So," Ryan cleared his throat, "how long are you going to hold my hand"

Dave looked at their joined hands resting upon the table top. He moved his hand to his lap and apologized to Ryan. "Sorry, I wasn't paying attention."

"Well, what do you want? I have somewhere to be."

Dave stiffened and then took a small drink of his latte. He sat it back down on the table and then sighed. "I guess, first I need to apologize. About everything. I shouldn't have asked you to kiss me at the bar. I mean, you ended it and I was just clinging on to hope but it wasn't fair to you."

Ryan nodded and drank his coffee. He wasn't going to talk yet; just listen.

"And I have to say thanks to you for not getting me into trouble." Dave said. "I honestly didn't even remember what happened that night until Horatio cornered me and told me to stay away from you."

Ryan sat the cup down. "You basically tried to force yourself onto me. I don't know whether or not you would've continued or if you would have realized that I really didn't want to, but it happened. You're lucky I didn't have you arrested."

"I know, so I'm thankful for you not doing that. I've never been that drunk before in my entire life. I shouldn't have even showed up to your house. I was just so upset and hurt that you were choosing him over me when I was the one that was there for you." Dave shrugged. "But you're in love with him and you can't help that. So, I'm sorry for trying to hurt you. I was being an idiot. And now you guys are having a baby."

Ryan gaped at him. How did he know that?

"I saw you both at the doctor's office a couple of weeks ago. I wasn't following you or anything like that. A friend of mine lives in the apartment complex across the street; we were outside hanging around and I saw you both." He sighed. "I was surprised, to say the least. But hey, that's great, right; you having a baby and all. And you're relationship with Horatio. I'm happy for you."

Dave fiddled with his cup. Ryan stared at him in awe. Dave was a nice guy before all this mess had happened. He seemed genuine, but Ryan still wouldn't let himself be lost in the moment.

"Thank you. I am really excited to be a dad. But I hope you respect our privacy and not say anything to anyone." Ryan said, smiling softly because he really was excited to be a dad.

"Of course not."

"And to be completely honest with you, I don't think I can forgive you for what happened. You were a drunken mess, so maybe you didn't really mean for it to happen. Maybe you didn't think it would go that far." Ran shrugged. "But then again, maybe you did. And I'll never know the truth to that. But I can forgive the situation at the bar- you didn't force me to kiss you. You asked, and I obliged."

Dave nodded. He smiled, but it was small. "I get it. I'll completely leave you and Horatio alone if that's what you want. But I just really wanted to tell you how sorry I was. Am. And good luck with the baby and Horatio, and well, everything."

Ryan and Dave both stood, and smiled awkwardly to each other. Both men grabbed their neglected cups of caffeine. "Thanks, Dave. I appreciate your apology."

"Well, it was long overdue. Can I walk you to your car?"

Ryan hesitated. He didn't think it was a wise idea. But this had gone fairly well so far, so why not? Dave had to go that way anyway to get to his own car. So, he nodded and they set off for the parking garage.

"You're so quiet."

"I'm just thinking about us." Ryan admitted.

"Us?"

Ryan stopped walking and turned to fully face Dave. He shifted and his left hand grasped his right arm. "Yeah, you know we were pretty close. We were friends, and a little more so. And I guess I always knew that it would end someday. But I didn't think it would end the way it did."

Dave agreed. "I know. Me neither. But I'll be okay. You're happy with Horatio and I'll move on. We'll be alright. Plus, I really wanted to hash this out with you. I don't think I can go on avoiding you in the lab any longer without Calleigh grilling me about what's wrong. We don't need an awkward or angry work atmosphere."

"You're right. Hey, how did you know that I was here?"

"Oh, I was walking by the café and I saw you and I wanted to talk to you but you were with a friend. So, I found your car and waited." Dave frowned and then paused. "That's not weird, is it?"

Ryan shrugged and nodded his head. "It is, actually. I should get going, so I'll see you tomorrow at the lab, right?"

Dave nodded, and Ryan moved to the front of his car. He felt Dave hovering behind him, so he turned. Dave slowly held his arms out, as if contemplating his actions. Dave hugged Ryan, leaving a little distance so their stomachs wouldn't touch. "Thank you so much for not letting Horatio go after me." Ryan laughed out loud at that, and let his left arm cross Dave's back and gave a few pats to it. Suddenly he pulled away.

"What was that?"

Dave looked around. "What; I didn't hear anything?"

Both were quiet. There was no noise. "This pregnancy is making me overly paranoid about people seeing me and realizing it." Ryan unlocked his car and got in. "I'll see you at the lab."

Dave waved him off, Ryan drove and disappeared from the lot. Dave smiled to himself and walked to his own car. He stopped and stared at the woman, standing in front of his own car. "What're you doing here?"


	16. Mystery Woman

Sixteen

The sounds of panting, skin slapping and moans were filling the air.

Ryan gripped onto the headboard across from himself to keep his balance as he bounced himself up and down with Horatio inside of him.

Horatio had his hands on Ryan's hips, gripping them tightly. Horatio loved the way it felt being inside of him. And he loved the sounds that he made. Ryan liked to be on top; that way, he could control how it went. Although, he did like when Horatio took charge. But today, Ryan just wanted to take it slow. He leaned in and kissed Horatio as well as he could, as bending was a little hard for him. He moved his hips in a circular motion.

Horatio noticed that Ryan was moving more and more slowly. His legs were obviously tired but Ryan would never admit it. Lately, Ryan was getting tied faster than usual. His legs were not an exception. He stopped moving briefly and tried to hide it by kissing Horatio harder. But he wasn't oblivious to his actions.

"Lay down on your back." He said. The younger man slowly shook his head. He wanted to be on top. Horatio was not fazed by Ryan's disagreement. Although he looked cute when he pouted, Horatio was putting his foot down. So to speak. "Ryan on your back." He said sternly.

Ryan frowned but listening to what he said. He got off, and lay down on his back while Horatio repositioned himself. He pushed back inside of Ryan. Who, in returned put his arms around Horatio's back, pulling him closer.

He continued with the slow pace that Ryan wanted. Ryan did like rough, vigorous sex, as did Horatio. But at times, they just really wanted to feel each other.

"Feel good?"

Ryan nodded his head. "Feels so good." He smiled when Horatio kissed him. He liked when they kissed; Horatio was always so passionate about everything he did. It was no surprise to Ryan that it extended to his lovemaking and the way he kissed. Ryan loved being intimate with him, but he could go without the touches as long as they continued to kiss. When they did, Ryan melted. His heartbeat would accelerate and it just made him happy to know that Horatio wanted it too. This was definitely love.

Horatio had thrust a few more times, spilling his seed inside of him. Ryan sighed deeply, feeling the warmth inside of himself. Horatio pulled out slowly and finished Ryan off with his hand.

"That was great." Ryan said. "But I'm tired. What time is it?"

Horatio checked his phone. "Its 9:03pm."

"Oh, that's it? I'm going to bed."

"No shower?"

"Too sleepy." Ryan closed his eyes.

Horatio got out of bed and returned with a wet cloth. He wiped Ryan off, and even opened his legs for him to wipe around his ole. He heard Ryan chuckling sleepily. "Thanks Horatio. Love you." He mumbled.

"I lo—." He stopped.

Ryan's eyes opened and he focused on Horatio immediately. Horatio stared back, troubled at Ryan. His eyebrows furrowed and he bit his lip. He didn't say anything else. Ryan's chest ached. He wanted Horatio to say that he loved him back. But only when he was ready. But it did hurt some times. He had gotten his hopes up.

"It's okay, Horatio."

"I'm sorry," Horatio began putting on his clothes. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Ryan said goodnight to him, Horatio reciprocated ad then left the house, and locked the door behind himself. Ryan sighed and stared at the ceiling. Now he wasn't tired. He was too focused on Horatio now. They'd only been dating a few months now. Horatio probably thought it was too early to be in love with him. And that was okay, Ryan could understand that. He closed his eyes again and tried to force the thoughts out of his head so he could rest.

Walter and Calleigh were busy talking about the case when they noticed Ryan. Horatio had called him into his office right before they all headed out to the field. But Ryan didn't come out with them. In fact, this was the first time they'd seen him in about two hours.

"Don't you think he looks a little sad?" Calleigh asked Walter.

"Yeah he does. Do you think it had to do with why Horatio called him in his office or why he didn't come to the crime scene?" He questioned. Calleigh nodded her head.

Ryan sighed to himself as he put on his lab coat and gloves. Of course he knew it was coming but he didn't think about it. Not really, anyways.

Horatio told him he was too far along to go to crime scenes. Ryan was always quick to run after a suspect and with him being five months pregnant now, he didn't think it was safe. And Ryan knew he was right but he didn't like it. Now he was stuck in the lab doing desk work and going over evidence. He liked doing those things but now that he couldn't work in the field it just wasn't the same.

Horatio had already thought of everything. When someone would ask Ryan or him why he couldn't help at crime scenes, the answer would be that Ryan hurt his shoulder last night so he had to take it easy for a while. That excuse would have bought them at least a few days. Then after, they would seriously have to tell people about the pregnancy. Ryan said he would be ready, though Horatio didn't believe that at all.

People noticed Ryan was getting bigger. But his weight fluctuated before and that was normal for him, and anyone really. So they didn't really think too much of it.

Ryan smiled at Calleigh, who had just walked over to him. "Hey Ryan. How are you doing?"

"I'm good, how are you?"

"Good. Listen, Eric and I are having a little get together tomorrow night after work." She told him. "You want to come? It'll be me and Eric, of course, Natalia, Horatio and you."

"Walter, Valera and Dave won't be there?" He asked. Calleigh shook her head and shrugged. "No, Walter apparently has a date. Valera is 'coincidentally' busy. And Dave, well, I invited him but he said it wasn't appropriate for him to be there. You don't think he's feelin' left out because he's the 'new guy', do you?"

"I don't know. But I'll try to be there. I've been sick lately, so we'll have to see." Ryan answered. Calleigh nodded said okay. She said she'd let Ryan get back to work, and left the room. He was just getting started on examining the evidence when Dave ran into the room. His eyes were wide and he looked rushed. "What's wrong?"

Dave shook his head. "No time. Came to warn you." He panted. "You have to leave now. Just get in your car and go."

"Go where? What's going on, Dave?"

"You're in danger. I can't explain it all now it's a long story, but just go back to my place and—"

"Your place?" Ryan frowned.

"Yes, you can't go home. She knows where you live." Dave handed him a key. "Just go to my house, let yourself in and I swear I'll be there as soon as possible and I will explain everything to you."

"Who is 'she'?" Ryan asked.

"Ryan! Please just listen and trust me. Go now and I'll explain everything to you as soon as possible."

Ryan took off his gloves and shed his lab coat. He looked over to Dave. He seemed frantic and completely serious. A rush of different thoughts flooded through Ryan's mind. The main one being, what the hell is going on? But Dave said he would explain everything.

"Wait, I'm in danger; is Horatio?"

"No. I don't think. He's out at another crime scene now so just call him or text him saying you got sick and had to leave early. I'll cover for you. But you really have to go now; if something happened to you or your baby-."

Ryan almost shut down. He was pregnant, and almost forgotten. Dave was telling him there was danger and he was too busy questioning him instead of worrying about his own baby. He didn't want anything to happen to his baby. Ryan nodded as he shrugged his lab coat off and let it fall on the floor. He made his way out of the room. He passed both Valera and Walter who both called out to him, asking where he was going in such a rush. But he ignored them and got into the elevator. When the doors opened again, he was in the car garage lot facing Natalia.

"Ryan, I'm so glad I caught you."

"Uh, this isn't a good time, Natalia." He walked past her, almost tuning her out completely. But he did hear the yell of "but your car!"

His car; what was wrong with his car? Ryan stopped in front of it. The front window was busted out. The front lights broken. And there were words scratched onto the side. Words like 'baby' and 'slut'. He saw more that he didn't even want to look at.

Ryan saw Natalia watching him by the elevator. "I'll get a cab." He said, then swiftly walked out of the lot.

Dave was clocking out of work when he saw Walter staring at him menacingly. "Ryan was okay until you talked to him." He said. "And then he just ran out of here and now Natalia told me someone vandalized his car. What's going on?"

Dave shrug. "I have no idea what you're talking about. Even if I did, it doesn't concern you. See you later." He pat the larger man on his back and swiftly made his way to the elevators.

"Someone vandalized Mr. Wolfe's car?" Walter came face-to-face with Horatio. He nodded. "Yeah, and Dave knows something but he won't spill."

"Where is Ryan now?" Horatio asked. Walter didn't know. "Okay, Walter have his car processed and then rush the results to me. And then have the security tapes looked at. I'm going to send someone out to his house."

Walter turned to go do as he was told. Horatio pulled out his cellphone and dialed Ryan's number. It rang three times and then went to voicemail. He hung up and tried again. This time, it rang twice before going to voicemail. _What is going on with Ryan and why is he ignoring my calls?_ All he knew was that Dave was involved somehow. And that was enough to get his blood boiling.


	17. Safe Place

Seventeen

Ryan looked around him. He'd been inside of Dave's house before, but never by himself. And now he was stuck here because of some 'danger' involving himself. He was sure it had something to do with the murders from months ago. Those cases had gone cold. No new evidence. No DNA. No suspects. And it had something to do with why Mitchell got surgery to look like him. But somehow a woman fit into this thing. He just had to wait until Dave got home to explain everything to him.

Normally, Ryan wouldn't have been afraid. He'd been threatened and beaten before. He could take care of himself. But Ryan was pregnant and he just couldn't risk something harming him now. It had taken him a lot to trust Dave's judgement and to go back to his place instead of his own. Given their history, Ryan wasn't sure if it was just a ploy to get him over there. But something just told him to trust him on this one.

And to top it off, Horatio had called him twice and Ryan sent both calls to voicemail. He never ignored him before, and he certainly didn't want to. But he couldn't talk to him now. He would crack under pressure for sure, and tell Horatio where he was. And he was at Dave's house. There was no doubt that Horatio would show up to get him. But he just couldn't get Horatio involved in this- whatever this was. Not until Ryan knew what was going on himself. But what if someone was following Horatio? Or even him? He didn't want that to happen.

Still, he didn't want to worry his boyfriend. He did just take off without saying anything to anyone. So Ryan figured he would send a quick text to him.

_**Hey Horatio, I'm sorry for leaving without telling you. I'll call you later.**_

He turned on the TV and turned to a news station, just on a hunch. He waited a few moments, and didn't hear anything so he was about to turn it off. Then almost like clockwork, he saw the large BREAKING NEWS headline on the screen and a familiar woman reporter appear.

"Breaking news, we have just gotten word that the Miami-Dade crime lab is now on lockdown," she said, pressing her earpiece. "We have been informed that an intruder had entered the parking garage and written threatening messages on a CSI Ryan Wolfe's vehicle." Ryan hadn't read any threatening messages. "Stating that he was in 'big trouble', and 'everyone would pay'. No word yet on Ryan Wolfe's whereabouts. And also no word if this is linked to the string of murders a few months back. But we're told this matter is being taken very seriously and the lab will be on lockdown until further notice."

Ryan sighed and jumped when he heard knocking on the door. His eyes widened. Did someone find him?

"Ryan?" He heard Dave's voice. "It's me; let me in. You have my key, remember?"

He stood and couldn't open the door fast enough. Dave came inside and shut and locked the door. He shook his head. "I just heard on the radio that the lab is closed; it's so crazy. Have you heard from Walter? He asked about you; or actually demanded about you."

"No. But Horatio keeps calling. I shouldn't have worried him like this, but I was trying not to worry him by telling him. It backfired." He sat down on the couch. Dave sat with a decent amount of distance between the two. "Did you tell him you were here?"

"Not yet. But you have to talk to me. Tell me what's going on?" Ryan questioned.

Dave sighed. "Ryan, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault," he knew immediately that this was not good. "This woman, Wendy, has been harassing and stalking me and now I've brought you and well, everyone in it."

"Well why is she following you and how am I involved?"

"Wendy and I were friends, but I guess her and my relationship resembled yours and mine; she claims to be in love with me." Dave answered. "And I don't love her. She's been following me around for months. I guess she found out about you and how I felt about you and she's completely lost her mind. She's threatened me and now she's threatening you, too."

"She has completely fucked up my car. I bet they're processing it at the lab right now." Ryan said. "I don't get it; why is she threatening me? And does this have anything to do with the cases; that's what they think so on the news?"

"I knew Janice Lee." Dave said. Whoa, bombshell, Ryan thought. "She was a friend of my sisters before our family moved away. I hadn't seen her or her family since then. It had been about ten years, and she found me. Janice wanted to get together and catch up and I agreed. Wendy saw us and freaked out. She thought we were dating and then threatened her. I cut off contact with Wendy but she just wouldn't stop.

"When she finally did stop talking to me, I found out that Janice was in a secret relationship. With Gary. Wendy found out somehow. Turns out, he started an affair with Wendy- she just wanted to spite Janice. Wendy asked Gary to make a bracelet for her, to which he complied. Then bam, a week later, Janice is dead and the bracelet was planted in her house. Maybe she was trying to frame Gary, but that fell short since Gary hadn't told anybody about the bracelet yet. It couldn't be traced to him exactly. And I couldn't do or say anything about it because I had no proof. And well, I didn't want to be under investigation."

Ryan nodded. "Okay, that explains Janice and Gary. But Dave, you knew this and didn't say anything?"

"When I heard about Janice I had a feeling Wendy had something to do with it. I tried and tried to find things to place her at the scene but I couldn't. And if I accused her and nothing came of it, she would have known it was me. And she probably would've came after me with more force. For a small woman, she's pretty intimidating." Dave answered. "But now there is proof. Gary had a journal and he talked about Wendy. A lot. She found it and then she realized that he knew she had killed Janice because he saw the bracelet on the news broadcasts. So she got rid of him. This morning, I was at her house and I found the journal. I have it in my bag. I'm going to turn it in. I was going to but I saw her lurking around outside the lab. And she wasn't on property so it wasn't like I could tell her to leave. I had a feeling she was planning something bad so, I didn't have a chance to turn the journal in. I just warned you.

"I don't know how she knew you're pregnant. She followed me, or maybe it was you to the café, and maybe she overheard us. Or maybe she noticed your stomach. I don't know, but she doesn't care. Wendy is crazy and she wants you gone."

Ryan instinctively put his hand over his stomach. Protecting his child was his only concern. "So, what about Mitchell? Why does he look like me? Or at least, tried."

Dave hesitated. "I don't think I can tell you that."

"Why not? You've told me this much, just continue." Ryan said. "Whatever it is, as long as you tell the truth, I'll do anything I can to help you."

Dave nodded. "We saw each other a few times. I didn't care he was in a relationship. Until he told me that he loved me. I told him I was in love with you. The next thing I know, a year later, he's walking around looking like you. I have no idea how Wendy found out about him. That's the only thing I can't work out."

"So you knew him, yet you pretended you didn't? You said you were observing because you 'heard about him' but you knew all along."

Dave nodded again. "I lied. I didn't want to admit I knew this crazy, lovesick guy. He got surgery to look like you for me. Who the hell does that? Normal people don't. I would have been linked to his murder and I probably would have lost my job. Not to mention an investigation on the lab, led by Stetler of course. I didn't want to risk that. I think Wendy saw him and maybe confused him as you? I'm not sure yet. Even though you and I aren't together, she doesn't care."

Ryan sighed. _This is apparently what happens when you stick your dick in 'crazy'._

He was trying to take in all of this information. His phone started ringing again. It was Horatio again. "So, what now? How is your place safer than mines?"

"She's never been here before. She follows me, but I take cabs everywhere and sometimes I'd switch them out so she couldn't keep up." Dave told him. "I knew something was up when she started lurking outside the lab. And as for now, she's slipped up. She became bold- vandalizing your car in the lot. They're going to see her on camera, and bring her in questioning. I know it was sketchy to get you out of the lab but I just had a bad feeling, like something was going to happen when you got off of work. And I needed to explain this all to you anyways. If I know her, then Wendy probably went to your place to find you. And since you suddenly 'went missing' from the lab, I know that Horatio would lead the police to your house to look for you. Instead, they'll find Wendy."

Ryan gaped. He moved closer to Dave, shaking his head. "You're a genius. Maybe not when it comes to dating, but damn. Honestly, I took a taxi and almost had him take straight home. I'm glad I listened to you."

Dave chuckled. "I'm glad you did, too. I'm really sorry about all of this. After they catch her I'll turn in Gary's journal and I'm telling them everything. I'm probably going to be fired, if not worse for tampering and concealing evidence. But I thought you should know first."

"Well, thanks."

Ryan's phone began ringing again. He looked at the caller ID. "It's Calleigh. I have to answer it." Dave nodded knowingly. "Hey Cal." He answered.

"Ryan, Horatio just said they found some woman with a gun trying to break in your house. Are you okay? You took off from the lab so fast." She asked frantically. "I'm fine, I'm at Dave's house." Ryan said. "Will you tell Horatio for me?"

"Dave's house? Why?" Calleigh began talking to someone in the background. "He says to wait there, he's coming to pick you up." She hung up the phone and Ryan sighed. He looked over to Dave, who had his head leaning against the couch. He smiled sadly at Ryan.


	18. More Trouble

Eighteen

Ryan sat down, waiting for Rick Stetler to talk to him. He was already interviewing Dave about what happened. He even asked the others from the lab but they had no idea. Now Ryan was sitting, feeling like a kid waiting in the principal's office.

Wendy had confessed to trying to kill Ryan. After catching her trying to crawl in through his kitchen window with a gun in hand, it was kind of hard to deny it. She even stated that she was walking around the lab, waiting for him to get off of work since she knew his schedule. She was going to follow him. But that was ruined when Ryan left early. After Dave handed over Gary's journal, instead of taking her right to jail, she was being held for additional questioning. And now Dave had to talk to Stetler. Ryan felt bad; though Dave did exclude and hide evidence, Ryan understood. He'd done some questionable things, too as a CSI. But he had Horatio to defend and look out for him. But Horatio wasn't a fan of Dave after what had happened. So who would defend him?

Horatio, Dave and Ryan had driven in complete silence. There wasn't anything to say. Ryan didn't mean to worry Horatio but he did. He would have to try to make it up to him soon.

"I didn't kill Janice. I have no idea who she is." Wendy said flatly

Frank sat across from her. "Oh really? Then why did Gary write about it? And why does Dave have saved messaged on his phone in which you distinctively threatened his and her life?"

Wendy shrugged. "Fine, I knew of her. But you can't prove I killed her."

"We can prove you killed, though." Horatio said. "We found both a .45 and a .308 in the trunk of your car. We had one of our CSI's fire the guns to test them and guess what? They're the same bullets from Gary Hall and Mitchell Stoke's murder."

Wendy crossed her arms and smiled at the lieutenant. "Good to see you again, Horatio." Frank glanced at the redhead, who in turn looked down. Wendy huffed out.

Frank continued on. "And we found Mr. Oliver's finger prints on the guns. Why don't you tell us how he comes in on this?"

"He was tired of Mitchell cheating on him all the time. I guess he started following him and that led him to Dave. We just so happened to run into each other-." She said.

"While you were both stalking the men." Horatio added.

She glared at him. "The tracking chip was my idea. He'd slip it into Mitchell's things to track him but I guess he caught on. Mitchell knew he was being tracked but he'd found a way to stop that- he threw the chip in a pool to destroy it but kept it on him. So Mr. Oliver thought the chip just broke but I knew better. It had been tampered with but Mitchell would still carry it around so it wouldn't seem like he caught on. When he realized that Mitchell knew and destroyed the chip, he knew he had something to hide. He was furious. He wanted Mitchell dead but that wasn't my battle. So I lent him my guns, let him take his pick. But then he had this brilliant idea; make it look like a serial killer to divide the attention from ourselves."

"It was a decent plan until you became too angry. Then you trashed Ryan's car; we have you on camera. And you caused both of your downfalls. How is the plastic surgeon involved in all of this?" Frank asked.

Wendy smiled. "He isn't. It was a coincidence really that Janice and Mitchell both used him. But he was the best in town so I guess it wasn't too surprising. Though when we found out he was being investigated, we hoped he wouldn't have had a solid alibi." Wendy shrugged again. "You know Horatio, if we had finished what we started, you'd be the one being investigated and not me."

"And how is that?" Frank asked, extremely curious as to what was going on.

"I tried to plant a few things in your house. But then Ryan showed up and ruined everything- you were so jumpy and paranoid after that. I couldn't do anything without you noticing then."

Frank glared at her. "You're a terrible criminal."

Horatio was searing in anger. "You'll be lucky if you only get life in prison."

An officer in the room pulled Wendy up out of the chair. He put hand cuffs on her and took her away. Horatio never took his eyes off of her until she was out of eyesight. He could see Frank looking at him with a somewhat confused look on his face. But Horatio chose to ignore it. "Get Mr. Oliver and arrest him, Frank."

Frank nodded and was off. Natalia entered the room. She handed Horatio a stack of photos. "We found these in Wendy's car, it may help with her trial to prove she was stalking Dave. But, Horatio-."

He was already flipping through the pictures. Each one made his heart drop more. His mouth suddenly felt dry. "He's with Ryan." He whispered.

Natalia nodded. "Yeah, honestly it looks like a date. I guess it makes sense; why she became so angry with Ryan. I guess she thought he was the reason she and Dave weren't together. I didn't know Ryan was, _you know_. I knew about Dave but not Ryan. I'm not judging or anything. But it's a bit of a shock."

Horatio continued to skim through them. The first picture showed Dave and Ryan sitting at a table at some café, holding hands. The next was of Ryan smiling at something. The one after that was a photo of the two walking closely together in a parking garage. And the last one mad Horatio feel absolutely sick to his stomach. It was them hugging. _Why would Ryan be out with this man, the same one that attacked him? And why would they be hugging?_

The time stamps were at the bottom of the pictures. It seemed familiar to him. _It couldn't have been the same day that Ryan had said he was going to meet with Alexx, right? Ryan wouldn't have lied about that. Right?_

Ryan was shaking his head furiously. He hated talking to Stetler. He actually accused him of hiding evidence. Just because Dave had didn't mean that Ryan did, too. He didn't know anything until a few hours ago. He was just glad it was over. He stood in the parking garage, waiting to catch Horatio coming out.

"Ryan!" Dave called out to him. "Hey, you didn't get in trouble right? I told Rick that you had no involvement in any of this."

He shook his head and looked around. "I didn't. But what about you; I saw you get escorted out. If they see you out here you'll get in even more trouble."

Dave looked around. "We can go behind the cars or something. I want to talk to you."

Ryan glanced at the elevator; he was waiting for Horatio. But he was sure that it would still take a while. As far as he knew, Horatio was still questioning Wendy. He started to follow Dave to his car. They didn't get in, they just stood by it, a little out of view from the elevators. Dave sighed. "Suspension until further notice. But we'll see, I guess. I just wanted to thank you for actually listening to me and trusting me enough."

"It's no problem. We were friends, and though some things happened between us, I believed you. And I'm glad I did." Ryan nodded.

Dave smiled at him. But it wasn't a happy smile. "You know, it sucks to know that the person you care so much about is in love with someone else."

"I know that feeling." Ryan said softly.

"Ryan, I love you."

"I know. And I guess I love you too in an odd way." He answered. "Just in a different way. You were there for me. And I appreciate that."

Dave nodded. "You're very optimistic. I know that, too."

Ryan glanced again toward the elevator, not seeing anyone. "You'll find someone eventually. Hopefully someone that's not crazy enough to get plastic surgery for you, or someone that's a stalker or a murderer."

That got Dave to smile again, and he chuckled this time. "Ah, keeping hope alive, I see. Maybe someday. But right now I'll probably just focus on myself. And I really am happy for you. Having a baby is exciting, I've heard. Scary but exciting all the same."

Ryan gave Dave a hug. "Thanks." He answered. "Hey maybe I can talk to Horatio a bit about you. I can explain to him that while we're not exactly friends, we're not enemies. I mean, after you get over me and all. Maybe he'll be more, _approving_ of you then."

Dave nodded. "Sounds good."

They both heard a loud ding from the elevator. Ryan's smile fell and he peered around the vehicles to get a look at whoever just came out. He was hoping it wasn't Stetler; he'd completely blow a gasket if he saw Dave still here. Dave remained quiet and so did Ryan. "It's Horatio." Ryan whispered. He could see Horatio looking around the garage. Ryan turned and saw his vehicle a few spaces away from Dave's. Ryan mentally cursed at himself. Horatio would be coming this way.

Dave just remained still, as if that would make the two invisible. Horatio walked over, for a moment it looked as if he were going to pass them. But he turned and they were caught like a deer in headlights. The lieutenant stood there, just staring at them. Time seemed to be moving in slow motion. Ryan could hear his own breathing and ringing in his ears.

Time resumed normally when Horatio turned and continued walking to his car. Ryan immediately dashed after the man. He started calling out for him so loud he was sure the people inside of the lab could hear. But he didn't care. "Horatio, don't walk away. You know I'm not as fast as I used to be!" he called. But he continued and unlocked his car door. "Please stop and talk to me."

Horatio stood by his car door. He didn't move. He didn't speak. He just stared at Ryan, expectantly.

"Dave was thanking me for-."

"Just tell me one thing, Ryan." Horatio interrupted him. "Did you really go see Alexx? Or did you lie to me and go meet Dave instead?"

Ryan gaped at him. "No, I didn't lie. I went to see Alexx and he just happened to be there. He just apologized to me about what happened. How did you...?" Ryan started but trailed off. Horatio shook his head. "Wendy took pictures of you two together. Holding hands and hugging, and now I see you both together again. What were you both doing hiding behind the cars?"

"Horatio, you don't seriously think I would do anything like that? Especially in public; here?"

"I just don't understand. Why did you hide the fact that you and Dave met up if it wasn't a big deal? Then you disappear and ignore my calls and I find out from Calleigh that you're at his house. Why?"

Ryan stammered. "I-I don't know. I'm sorry, I just didn't want to worry you but I did the opposite. Horatio, I love you, I wouldn't do anything to," he shook his head, "I hope you don't think I'm cheating on you."

"I don't really know what to think. You said you wouldn't lie to me but you did. You said you wouldn't hurt me but you did." Horatio answered. He noticed Dave had slunk back into his car was just seemingly sitting there, watching them. "You know, Ryan, I told you I would protect you so why didn't you let me. Why did you let him?"

"I wasn't thinking."

"I'm sorry, Ryan. But I guess I need time to think about things- alone."

"Are you breaking up with me?" Ryan asked him. Horatio looked back at Dave again, and then to Ryan. He nodded. And then he just got into his car and Ryan watched him drive away.

He heard Dave honk his horn after calling his name a few times. Ryan didn't move from that spot. He vaguely heard a car starting, and then he saw Dave pulling up next to him. "I can take you home. I know your car is still in the lab for evidence." Dave told him. "Or I can call you a taxi."

Ryan shook his head. "I'll be fine. I can call one for myself."

Horatio really broke up with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> drAMAAAA


	19. Heartbreak

Nineteen

Horatio lay in bed, trying to get comfortable. He wasn't sure why, but he just felt terrible. He had broken up with Ryan. But he hadn't prepared himself for the look of hurt that stained the younger man's face. While he just nodded and drove off.

But he had a reason to break up with him. He didn't trust Ryan. He didn't tell him about meeting up with Dave. Sure, he still would have been upset but if Ryan had just explained it to him, he would have understood. Or tried to.

Then, Ryan was in apparent danger. And he ignored his calls. Horatio didn't even know at the time that he was in trouble. All he had known was Ryan's car had been vandalized and that he left in a hurry. Then he finds out from Calleigh that he's at Dave's house. Ryan ignored Horatio's calls, but he answered for Calleigh. That was very troubling for him. He never felt that Ryan would cheat on him, but now he was keeping very important things from Horatio. What was he supposed to think?

Ryan had told Horatio countless times that he loved him. And Horatio believed that; he had no doubt in his mind about that. But he still felt hurt and betrayed. And he just couldn't be with someone who kept things from him. Maybe Ryan just grew tired of him. Or maybe he was done waiting for Horatio to tell him his feelings back. And he couldn't fault Ryan for that. But still, he was upset.

He really cared about Ryan. And they were having a baby together. They were supposed to be a family. Horatio wanted that desperately. But now that was gone. It had only been 6 hours since they had broken up and Horatio felt like a huge part of him was missing. It hurt badly. He never expected it to be this painful.

He thought he should have let Ryan explain more but really, what more could be said? Ryan saw Dave without telling him. And he had to find out by photographs taken by a stalker. Those pictures- Horatio was enraged just thinking about them. Ryan had told him that Dave apologized and that he was just hearing him out. But that didn't explain that hand holding or the hug. If they were friends again, or even seeing each other again, Horatio thought it was fine. But he at least wanted to know what was going on. And since Ryan didn't tell him, the whole thing looked suspicious.

Horatio sighed and turned over onto his side. He was no saint either. He had a woman at his house with the full intent of having sex with her. But he wasn't exclusive with Ryan at that point. Still, he was sure it had hurt Ryan just the same. Granted, he and that woman did not have sex but he still felt guilty. And Ryan even let him explain it to him. Then, he got over it because Horatio was honest with him. Horatio knew Ryan loved him, he showed it in every way possible.

But he couldn't say it back. Surely, Ryan was tired of waiting for him.

Ryan couldn't sleep. How could he when the man he was so helplessly in love with had broken up with him? When he and Horatio got together, he knew that he had been hurt. Two of his loves died, and two he just couldn't have. And Ryan vowed to never do anything to hurt Horatio. But he did.

Of course it was unintentional. He could even understand why he was so upset. Ryan did sit down and talk to Dave, and he should have told Horatio about it, given their past. He knew he would have been extremely upset too if Horatio had been the one to get together with an ex that hurt him and didn't even tell Ryan about it. And the pictures had to have been worse since they were viewed out of context. Ryan didn't have to see the pictures, he was there. He lived and experienced it. He knew what happened. Ryan knew that if the roles were reversed, he would have been livid.

And then he worried Horatio. He didn't answer his calls. If Horatio had done the same, he would have been so worried. The point was, Ryan got why Horatio was upset.

He just wanted a chance to talk to him. Ryan loved Horatio so much. And they were having a baby. There was nothing Ryan wanted more than to be a family. All he wanted to do was just talk to Horatio but he should wait until he contacted him first. He would have made it worse if he didn't. Horatio needed time and Ryan would give that to him.

Sitting up, Ryan turned on the TV to take his mind off of things. He watched mindless reality shows. It did help seeing these people competing for love by partying and fighting. Ryan laughed quietly to himself. Things certainly were changing in the ways to find love.

His phone ringing startled him. Ryan half-expected it to be Horatio. But it wasn't; it was Eric Delko. It was only 10pm, so it wasn't too late to be calling. He just wasn't expecting it.

"Hey, what's up Eric?" He answered.

" _Wolfe!_ " It was obvious that Eric had been drinking. "What are you doing? You wanna come over?"

"I'm watching TV. Where's Calleigh?"

Eric groaned. "She went out tonight with Natalia and Valera. Since she's having a girl's night out, I'm having a boy's night in. Walter's already here so you get your ass here, too."

Ryan rolled his eyes as he heard Walter yelling in the background "come on Ryan! And bring snacks."

"Yeah, bring snacks." Eric agreed. Ryan laughed and said okay. They hung up and Ryan got out of bed and tried to find suitable clothes to wear. He settled on some sweatpants and a loose shirt. That was all he pretty much wore these days when he wasn't working.

He just hoped that neither Walter nor Eric would comment on it.

Horatio was surprised that Eric called and invited him over to hang out. But he just wasn't in the mood to. He was getting tired and all he wanted to do was sleep. He heard Walter yelling, saying that Ryan was coming too. But he didn't want to go. He was too tired. Horatio cleared his mind and closed his eyes. He just wanted to sleep and forget the whole day.


	20. Hospital

Twenty

Alexx stared at Ryan. Her heart had dropped when she saw his name on the hospital's infirmary list. Walter and Eric both carried him in together, according to the documents.

He lay down on the hospital bed, looking exasperated. "Alexx, I'm fine." He told her. She looked at him sternly. "Ryan, Walter said that you fell." She said.

"I tripped on the porch steps. It was only three stairs. And I even landed on my back." Ryan explained. Alexx shook her head.

"It could have caused trauma. Now Ryan, baby, just relax and I'll have the test results soon." She told him. Ryan's face softened and he nodded, listening to his friend.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry." He answered. "I'm just not in a very pleasant mood."

"I get it. I know you're scared about something happening to your baby. But you don't have to mask that with anger or denial. I called Horatio and-."

Ryan leaned forward. "You called him? Why?"

"Because he deserves to now." She snapped. "And when we release you, I want someone to take you home and take care of you. Walter had to leave and Eric will have to get a taxi home. I want you safe in Horatio's care."

Ryan laid back again and sighed. Well now his secret was out. Everything had happened so fast. He, Walter and Eric were having a good time. It was getting late, and so Ryan figured he would go home.

The two other men walked him to the door and was saying goodbye, when Eric tripped over his own feet, bringing Ryan down with him. Walter had grabbed Eric's shirt collar, before they hit the ground, and managed to stop him from landing on top of Ryan. But he still fell. At first Walter and Eric were laughing. Eric was drunk and found it funny he had fallen. Walter laughed because Eric was.

But Eric suddenly stopped when he saw Ryan. He was sitting up and staring down to his stomach, seemingly inspecting himself. His hands started to roam his stomach. Walter had stopped laughing, too. "Ryan?" He called out.

Ryan looked up at Walter, but Eric was diving at him. He lifted Ryan's shirt and stared at the bump. "What is this? What's going on- are you hurt?" Eric asked.

Ryan stammered. He couldn't get the words out. Then, Walter was beside him trying to lift him up. "He's pregnant," he said. "We have to get him to a hospital, Eric."

That seemed to snap Eric out of his drunken state. He jumped to his feet and helped Ryan up along with Walter. The men put him in the car, and Walter drove as fast as he could to get him to the hospital. That was last night. Now it was morning and Ryan was still there.

They said they wanted to keep him overnight, just to keep an eye on him and the baby. But he did seem fine.

Horatio walked through the doors, going right past the sign in and alerting a few staff members. Eric, who was in the waiting room, saw him and followed. A nurse tried to stop him but Eric cut in.

"Alexx Woods called him." Eric said. "He's here for Ryan Wolfe; we both are."

The nurse nodded. "Okay, please wait here and I'll page Alexx for you guys." Eric agreed and she walked off.

Eric noticed Horatio was giving him a look. "Eric, why am I just now being told that Ryan is in the hospital?" Horatio asked. Eric shrugged. "The doctor called family first. Alexx got in this morning and called you."

"Why didn't you call me?"

"I don't know it's just," he paused, "this has to be an elaborate joke, right? There's no way Ryan's pregnant. Right?"

Horatio saw Alexx gesturing to them. He sighed and shook his head. "It's no joke, Eric." He made his way to Alexx. She tried to smile when he approached her. She missed him and wished she were seeing him under different circumstances. "Hey Horatio."

"Hello Alexx."

"Ryan's right in there," she pointed to the door she came out of. "He fell down some stairs. He seems to be fine but were just running more tests to be absolutely sure."

She opened the door for him. Ryan lay perfectly still on his side, staring at the monitors in the room with him. He could feel Horatio behind him but he didn't want to turn around. Alexx left the room, leaving them alone. Horatio walked in front of Ryan, who looked up at him. He looked so sad. "I'm sorry, Horatio."

He was met with Horatio's signature head tilt, but with a look of confusion. So Ryan continued. "I fell. It could have really hurt the baby. I should have been more careful."

"Ryan it was an accident. Right now I'm concerned about how you're feeling?" He questioned. "Do you have any pain from your back? Or does your stomach hurt in any way?"

Ryan slowly shook his head no. "My back feels fine. My stomach does, too. Alexx says that she thinks everything will be okay."

Horatio smiled and bent to place a soft kiss to Ryan's forehead. "Everything will be fine. You're a fighter, Ryan. A strong one, too. And I have no doubt that our baby is one, too." Ryan reached out to grip Horatio's hand. He didn't let go and Horatio didn't seem to want him to anyways.

Alex returned with Eric on her tail. She held a stack of papers in her hands. "Horatio, Ryan- sorry to interrupt but I have good news."

Eric couldn't even focus on Alexx speaking. He was staring at Ryan and Horatio holding hands. Why were they holding hands? He understood comforting others, but this seemed personal. Well, of course it was personal- they were friends. But it was intimate.

"The baby is fine." Alexx breathed out. "Good health, normal heart beat and everything. And Ryan will be fine too."

Horatio smiled again at Ryan. He knew things would be okay. Although he was a little nervous. After Alexx had called, Horatio sped down the streets. Even though she had assured him on the phone that everything was alright, he still couldn't shake the worried feeling. If something had happened to Ryan or the baby, he wouldn't have known what to do.

And just like that, everything that Horatio was upset about the previous day was gone. He didn't even care anymore about Dave or Wendy, or the fact that Ryan had kept it a secret. He knew that Horatio would have freaked out. And while that was no excuse, it was still true. But Horatio couldn't bring himself to be upset anymore even if he tried. All he cared about was that his family was safe.

He just couldn't control himself anymore. Horatio dropped to his knees and pulled Ryan in for a passionate kiss. Ryan instinctively put his hand on Horatio's back to pull him closer.

Alexx smiled. Her babies were okay. And she could see the love between the two.

Ryan pulled away first. "He's gone."

Horatio and Alexx turned. Eric was gone. Horatio just couldn't control himself. He wanted to kiss Ryan and he didn't care who saw it. He placed another kiss to Ryan's lips. "You sign out and I'll go try to talk to him."

Ryan agreed and Horatio stood and left the room. He was upset that Eric left but really, what did he expect? Although, Ryan couldn't lie- he loved the kiss. He just hoped things were okay between Horatio and Eric.

Alexx hugged Ryan after he got out of the bed. She smiled largely and pat his shoulder. "You'll probably have some back pain but that'll be normal. Just try to take it easy for a few days."

"Okay, I will."

"Also, can I start planning your baby shower now? Everyone knows now, right?" She asked.

Ryan sighed as they both started walking out the room together. They made it to the counter and Ryan signed himself out. "Well, Kyle knows. Eric knows now and will tell Calleigh." He thought about what Calleigh told him. "Oh and Walter knows so he'll apparently be telling Valera. Dave knows. So, I guess I have to tell Natalia. And Frank, but I don't think baby showers are his thing."

Alexx nodded. "Well, good luck baby. And do call me the moment I can start planning it. Bye Ryan."

He waved goodbye to her and walked out of the hospital. He saw Horatio's car parked right in front of the door. Horatio stood by the passenger side door and gestured for Ryan to get in. He promptly did and Horatio shut it behind him. Then, he walked around the car and got in the driver's side.

"Eric was already gone, I'll try to talk to him later. I don't think we should go to Calleigh's dinner, either. You need to rest." Horatio put the car in drive and pulled out of the hospitals parking lot.

"No, we should go please? If we don't, they'll think I'm not okay. And I hope you do- talk to him, I mean." Ryan answered. "You two are really close. I hope you can explain it properly to him."

"It'll be okay. So, where am I taking you?" Horatio asked him. Ryan frowned. "What do you mean?"

Horatio glanced at him and chuckled at his facial expression. "Am I taking you to your house or mines?"

Ryan smiled. "Your house is an option again?"

"Ryan, you are always welcome to my house any time. Besides, you're there so much, you might as well consider it a second home."

Horatio risked another glance. Ryan was looking out the window but he could still see his reflection. Ryan was smiling happily. Horatio took that to mean they were going to his house. Ryan seemed to like being at Horatio's home more than his own.

He felt a hand touching his hair gently. Fingers began to graze through it, rubbing his scalp softly. Horatio hummed at the touch. He liked when Ryan touched his hair. It was a small gesture of intimacy.

Ryan breathed out. "It's only been a day, but I missed this so much." He announced. "Did you?"

Horatio nodded. "Ryan, take my word on this; you will never have to go a day without it again."

Ryan continued to touch his hair. Horatio kept driving. They bother were silent, only listening to the soft hum of the car driving.


	21. Everyone Knows

Twenty One

Calleigh was glaring at Ryan menacingly. Her hands were gripping tightly to her own hips and her foot was tapping against the tile floor.

"Calleigh-."

"No, you don't speak." She interrupted. "How could you not tell me that you're pregnant? I like to think I'm a trustworthy friend, Ryan."

Ryan huffed out. "You are a great friend. I was just afraid of your reaction. After Eric-."

Calleigh waved her hand to dismiss that. "He's a big boy, he'll get over it. You didn't tell me about you and Horatio. When did this happen?"

"Oh, about 5 months ago."

"You know I had to find out from Eric. He was shocked and I had to force it out of him." She said. "Walter confirmed it for me and said you were in the hospital? Come on, Ryan, how could you not tell me?"

Ryan looked around for something, or someone to save him. Walter and Valera turned the other direction. When Horatio told him that Walter and Valera would be there because Calleigh 'forced' them to come, he had hoped they would be on Ryan's side. Horatio and Eric were in another room talking. And Natalia was wondering the same as Caleigh; why did Ryan keep this secret for so long?

"Girl's you can't gang up on me," Ryan whined. "I'm pregnant- don't stress my baby out. And I had a valid reason- fear."

Natalia shook her head. "Damn, he's right. But once you have the baby, Ryan, be ready for round two."

"I will be ready for round two."

Calleigh chuckled, causing the others in the room to do it, too.

Eric was pacing around the room. Horatio sat on a chair, waiting for him to speak. It had been like this for ten minutes now. The moment he and Ryan came through the door, Calleigh grabbed Ryan and pulled him away. Eric grabbed Horatio and pulled him upstairs.

Eric had been pacing around since then. He had so much that he wanted to say, but he just couldn't seem to get the words out. Horatio couldn't even have counted how many times he saw Eric open and close his mouth. The words just couldn't form.

Horatio had sighed a few times. He was growing impatient waiting for him to say something. He had thought that maybe he should be the first to speak, but he figured Eric wanted to be the first.

Finally, Eric stopped pacing and stared hard at the lieutenant. Horatio straightened himself out and stared back at the man.

"So," he paused, "Ryan is pregnant?"

"Yes."

"And you two are an item?"

"Yes."

"And the baby is yours and his? Like, he wasn't already pregnant and then you just decided to take charge?" Eric questioned.

"The baby is mine and his." Horatio explained.

Eric still stared, just looking for confirmation of this being a joke or a lie. But he knew Horatio; really knew him. And his friend never lied. And that kiss he witnessed at the hospital seemed too real to be a joke. He broke eye contact and shook his head. "Did you tell Mari?" He asked.

Horatio nodded. "Yes, I visited her grave a few months ago, and I told her everything." He said. "I felt she had a right to know."

"Do you still visit her or was it to just clear your conscious?" Eric accused. Horatio was taken back. He did understand why Eric would ask that, but he couldn't believe that he actually did. "I love Marisol very much, Eric. So, I still visit her and I tell her things in my life. Sometimes, I just sit in silence with her."

Eric didn't say anything, so Horatio continued. "I need to move on, Eric. Marisol would have wanted me to."

He sighed. "I know, H. She wouldn't want you to be sad about her forever. I wouldn't want you to do that either."

"Ryan and I are dating. I hope we stay together for a long time. And I hope you accept that."

Eric breathed out deeply and shrugged. "I guess if you and Wolfe are happy."

Horatio and Eric remained silent after that. They didn't have to say anything.

Despite being hounded by Calleigh and Natalia, Ryan was having a good time. He didn't expect Walter or Valera to show up as they were both coincidentally 'busy'. But Walter told him they postponed it when they knew that the girls were going to gang up on him. Walter never missed a good fight. Valera just wanted to confirm that Ryan was really pregnant. She couldn't believe she missed the signs, but they all agreed that everything made much more sense then.

Natalia was laughing loudly when Eric and Horatio finally made their way back downstairs. "All we need is Alexx here; then it'd be like the old times."

Valera nodded. "Well, we'll see her next weekend for Ryan's baby shower."

Ryan frowned and turned to Horatio. "Wait, she already invited you all? When; we , _just_ spoke this morning? How did I not get invited to my own shower?"

Horatio placed a hand on his shoulder. "Actually, she called me while you were showering before we came here. I confirmed the day with Alexx. I just forgot to tell you." He smiled. "Sorry about that."

Ryan rolled his eyes and faked a low, irritated groan. "So forgetful. But I'll forgive you."

Horatio kissed Ryan on the forehead. Ryan felt a little weird with the public displays of affection. He wasn't used to it. But he couldn't say he didn't like it.

Eric was eyeing Ryan. He stilled and almost panicked. Maybe his talk with Horatio didn't go well. Eric broke into a large grin and chuckled while he helped Calleigh serve dinner.


	22. The Baby Shower

Twenty One

The baby shower was going fairly well. Alexx had lots of food, lots of games and lots of talking, storytelling and laughter.

Everyone seemed to be having a good time. Caleigh was blowing up balloons like Alexx asked her to. Eric and Walter were sucking the helium out of said balloons and then yelling random, obscene things to each other. Ryan was sure that the two had been drinking before they showed up.

Alexx and Horatio were both exchanging stories about their encounters with Ryan. She even got him to tell the story of how they got together, which caused Ryan and Kyle both to blush when Eric's helium voice yelled out "sex _before_ the first date, Wolfe?" Then he and Walter laughed. Calleigh chuckled.

Valera was sitting next to Ryan, trying to explain some of the gifts he'd gotten. He had a diaper genie, in which he had no idea what to do with it. He eyed another little gadget and picked it up. "What the heck is this thing?" He asked.

"Oh, that's a breast pump." She explained. "To get the milk out."

Ryan dropped the pump and wiped his hands on his lap, as if it were used. Valera giggled and rolled her eyes at him.

Kyle sat next to his dad, trying to piece together a puzzle.

Natalia was busy eating food that Alexx had prepared. She was starving. But so was Ryan. Horatio expressed his concern about Ryan eating the unhealthy food. Alexx had fruits and vegetables, but Ryan didn't want that. Natalia would sneak him the 'good stuff' periodically. It was greatly appreciated by Ryan. Horatio pretended not to notice, figuring Ryan deserved to have those foods every now and again. He even smiled when he caught him a few times. Ryan would turn the other way and pretend to not notice his boyfriend staring.

There was light knocking at the door. Alexx stood and answered it. Calleigh, who had just finished the balloon, noticed and waved. "Hey Dave!"

Calleigh, Eric, and Valera called out to him. While Walter, Kyle, Natalia and Alexx stared apprehensively at him. Horatio was outright glaring at the man. Eric, was the first to notice the sudden tension in the room. Calleigh, then Valera noticed after.

Walter didn't expect Dave to be there. He had problems with him ever since the day Ryan's car was vandalized. He knew that it was Dave's fault- he was acting shady. And he was concealing evidence. Walter didn't like that.

Natalia had seen the pictures of Dave and Ryan together that had been taken by Wendy. She also was well aware of Ryan and Horatio's relationship. She did the math- they were together at the time the photos were taken. She knew it'd be awkward.

Kyle had seen Dave and Ryan kissing. He saw how that effected his dad. He didn't like that at all.

Alexx also knew of the old relationship. She also knew this could be bad. Ryan knew why Horatio glared at Dave. He had the right to be upset.

"Hi Dave," Alexx greeted him softly. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude, but did I invite you here?"

Dave shook his head as Ryan also stood. "No, I invited him. I hope you don't mind, Alexx."

She stepped aside to let Dave in. He smiled at everyone, trying not to show how awkward he felt. Ryan could feel Horatio and Kyle staring at him as he gave Dave a small hug. "Thanks for coming. Is that for me?" He asked. Dave nodded and handed the gift in his hands to Ryan. "Yeah, it's a pack of pacifiers. I thought you might need them."

Ryan smiled and guided him to sit down. Dave looked at Kyle and Horatio, then said hello to them. Calleigh shot Eric a look. They both looked at Alexx, who just shrugged. "Ryan, baby can I talk to you for a minute?"

He shook his head. "No, I'll explain to everyone- Dave and I unfortunately had some problems and issues in the past." He answered. "But there shouldn't be any more conflicts or issues between him and anyone in the lab when he gets back so I invited him as a way to kind of, mend things with everyone."

Dave nodded. "Yeah, and I'm not here to cause problems. I'm just here to celebrate with the rest of you."

Valera stood up. "Well, then can we keep the party going? I brought a fun game for us all to play."

Ryan smiled and kissed Horatio. Kyle recoiled. As much as he loved his dad, he did not want to see him kissing anybody. "Can we, Horatio?" Ryan asked.

He still glared at Dave. "I trust you, Ryan. But if Dave does anything I don't like or approve of, he will not survive."

The other's laughed as if Horatio were joking. But Ryan and Dave knew he was being completely serious. Horatio liked the scared look plastered on Dave's face. It made him smile.

The fun game Valera had brought was Twister. Ryan sat on the couch with a huge smile on his face. He was calling out what body parts went to which colors. Of course he couldn't play physically with them, but it was fun for him to see the others bumping into each other and fall. Alexx sat with Ryan.

Walter was the first out. He started sucking the helium out of the balloons again. Then, Natalia was out. She bumped into Kyle and fell over. Dave was next, slipping as his leg gave out. Ryan was sure that was Horatio's doing. Dave accepted the loss and began messing around with some of the baby supplies Ryan had received.

"Right hand; blue."

Eric's drunken self, toppled over. He joined Walter with the balloons. Horatio and Valera both bumped into each other. They both were out. She joined Walter, as Horatio sat with Ryan, rubbing the small of his back.

Kyle's phone began to ring and he gave up. He announced that he had a date, and gave Ryan a smile before he left. Calleigh fell over and giggled.

"I won!"


	23. Paternity Leave

Twenty Three

Ryan moaned loudly. He tried to stop himself, but he couldn't help it. Horatio was behind him, thrusting into him as hard as he could, hitting his spot over and over again. He had his hands tight on Ryan's hips.

Horatio's hand left Ryan's hip and went to cover his mouth. The moans became muffled whines as Horatio stopped moving. His breath touched Ryan's ear, causing him to shiver in delight.

"Ryan, I told you to be quiet." He whispered. "You don't want anyone to hear you, do you?"

He shook his head in response.

"We can't continue if you can't quiet down. Can you be good for me?"

Ryan frantically nodded. He just wanted Horatio to keep going. He had been so horny ever since he had gotten pregnant. Everything Horatio did just turned him on. He love it when they were in the privacy of their homes, but it was annoying when they were in the lab. They were in the bathroom of the lab; it was a cramped single-bathroom and Ryan couldn't be as loud or vocal as he needed to be.

Horatio bent him over the sink. Ryan gripped the porcelain so tightly that his knuckles were turning pale. Horatio kept his hand over Ryan's mouth. This was the third time he had to stop to get him to quiet down.

Ryan was growing more impatient with each passing second. Horatio liked it when he mad Ryan squirm with need. He pushing himself back against him instead. Horatio's hand over his mouth began to vibrate as Ryan moaned. Horatio had to bite his own lip to suppress his own noises.

He continued to push back against Horatio, going slow and then speeding up gradually. Ryan could faintly hear people outside the door, speaking to each other but he didn't care. All he could focus was on Horatio and having him. Horatio slowly let his hand fall from Ryan's mouth, and placed it back on the man's sides. Ryan was being quiet enough. His moans were now low huffs of air, breathing out. Ryan pushed back against him, and grinded against Horatio. He heard Horatio stifle a noise and felt the warm liquid inside of him. Ryan breathed out slowly as Horatio slid out of him, grabbing a paper towel to clean him up.

Ryan turned to face Horatio, and Horatio stopped in his tracks. He looked at Ryan. "You look good." He told him. Ryan smiled and said thanks. He did look good to Horatio. His eyes were heavy-lidded, his lips were red from biting on them and also were parted slightly. Ryan's cheeks were slightly red and his hair had become a little messy.

Horatio had gotten on his knees to finish him off. Ryan's hands gripped the lieutenant's hair and pushed him to take his cock in deeper. Ryan started panting as he looked down. He was upset he couldn't see Horatio's face; he loved to see his eyes looking back up at him. But as he was 7 months pregnant now, his stomach got in the way. He was frustrated, but he'd have to deal with it.

Ryan gripped tighter as a gasp escaped his lips as he came. Horatio had stopped sucking, and was licking Ryan's shaft when he came. He came back up and Ryan watched as he looked at himself in the mirror. He had cum on the side of his cheek and he chuckled when he saw it. Ryan laughed too, and grabbed another paper towel to clean it off for him. Horatio thanked him, gave him a kiss and then sighed.

"I hope no one has been looking for me." Horatio whispered. Ryan nodded.

The lab had been pretty busy today. The team had been out working a case, minus Ryan as he was too pregnant to go out. Ryan was busy working in the lab when he started to let his mind wander. He thought about Horatio and how great he looked when he was stern, and concentrated on working. Ryan loved that. When the others came back in, Horatio had went straight to his office and started looking after the paperwork on his desk. Ryan slipped out of the lab and made his way to Horatio. From the moment Ryan walked into the room and Horatio saw him, he knew something was up. Horatio took one look at Ryan and had to just stare. Ryan was biting his bottom lip and he didn't break eye contact from him. Horatio shook his head, and told Ryan he had a lot of work to do. But Ryan wouldn't take no for an answer. They hadn't had sex in a 'public' place before, and it was exciting to Ryan. He wanted Horatio to do it. But Horatio remained adamant, so Ryan gave him the option; stay there and do his work and let Ryan 'service' himself in the bathroom, or to come join him. Either way, Ryan needed a release. And the thought of Ryan touching himself was enough to go straight to Horatio's groin. So, he joined him.

Ryan and Horatio both rinsed their mouths out, and chewed on a piece of mint gum and smiled at each other. Horatio waited until there was less foot traffic outside the bathroom, before he left. He looked around, and knocked on the door to let Ryan know it was okay for him to come out, too. The two parted ways with each other, with Horatio going back into his office and Ryan going to the lab.

He ran into Walter, who looked angry. Ryan hoped his being upset wasn't directed at him for leaving. "What's up, Walter?"

Walter shook his head. "Nothing, just ran into Stetler. Since you're going on paternity leave, he wants us to add another person to the team."

Ryan frowned. "Really? But I'll be back in a few months."

"I know that. But he said there's a possibility that you'll enjoy parenting more than being a CSI so he wants to have a replacement 'just in case'." Walter rolled his eyes.

That got Ryan seriously thinking. He hadn't even thought of the possibility of not returning after paternity leave. Most of his paranoia sprouted from thinking about what would happen if Ryan couldn't be a CSI anymore. But now he had this new thought- what if he wants to be a stay-at-home father? He hadn't even considered that. Ryan was excited about having a baby. He was excited about being a father. But what if it got to the point where he didn't want to ever leave his baby? Of course he knew that it would be hard to return to work, because he'd miss his little child so much. But he always thought that he would return. Ryan loved being a CSI. But the thought of staying at home intrigued him, too.

_Maybe I should talk to Horatio._

He smiled at Walter and told him not to worry about it. Stetler had been on the labs back more than every lately since word got out that Ryan was pregnant. He started questioning him about the other father; who was it? Of course Ryan didn't say anything. Office relationships were prohibited. So he remained quiet about the situation.

After clocking out, Ryan looked around and sighed. This was the last time he could work on a case for a few months. But for good reason. He waited outside as Dave walked by. He stopped and smiled at him.

"Hey Ryan. You taking off?" He asked.

"Yeah, after today I am officially on-leave."

"Well, that's good. Except I'm sure you'll be bored and frustrated at home." Dave chuckled. "I haven't seen you much since I was switched to night shift."

Ryan nodded. "I know. When can you come back to day? Everybody misses you."

"Oh, soon, I hope. But I heard a rumor that I'll be returning soon so I'm keeping my fingers crossed." He told him. The elevators dinged and they both saw Horatio standing there. He put his sunglasses on and gave a cordial head nod to Dave. Dave waved to him and that was it. It was all they needed. Horatio still didn't like Dave but he could be cordial in the work place. Ryan smiled at Horatio. "You ready to go?"

Horatio nodded and took Ryan's hand. Ryan said goodbye to Dave and took off with Horatio, getting into his car and leaving. When they pulled into the driveway, Horatio went to check the mail while Ryan unlocked the front door with his key. When Horatio made it over to him, he gave a quick kiss to Ryan on the cheek. "I see you like using your key." He told him. Ryan nodded as they made their way inside.

When Horatio had given Ryan a key to his house, he started using it with every excuse. If Horatio would be home later, Ryan could just let himself in. If Horatio had went into work earlier or worked late, Ryan could let himself in or lock up behind himself. Ryan loved it. Naturally, he never came over unannounced or anything. But the thought did cross his mind.

Ryan immediately went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. "I'm starving. What do you want for dinner?"

Horatio almost told him, but then remembered the last few times Ryan made dinner. Apparently he had begun craving stranger things than usual. When Horatio requested homemade pizza, Ryan added oranges and chocolate sauce. Ryan saw nothing wrong with it, while Horatio could barely stand even look at the creations.

"Um, what do you want to eat?" He chuckled. "You tell me what you want, and I'll tell you if I want it, too."

Ryan pondered. "Hmm. I could go for grilled cheese-"

_Okay, that's pretty normal._

"And maybe tomato soup—"

_Also pretty normal, so far so good._

"Oh, but I really want marshmallows. Do you think—?"

Ryan started. Horatio shook his head. "No, no, no. A million times 'no', Ryan. Marshmallows do not go with grilled cheese or tomato soup."

Ryan made a face as if Horatio had just crushed his whole world. Which of course, did feel like the case to Ryan. Horatio had been getting that look a lot lately and each time it would make him feel terrible. "But, why not? I like grilled cheese sandwiches. I like tomato soup. And I like marshmallows. Why can't I eat them together?"

"Ryan, it's going to give you a stomach ache. Again."

"But Horatio!" Ryan whined as he finally shut the fridge. Horatio made his way over to Ryan and wrapped his arms around him to calm him down. He shushed Ryan softly. "How about we just do the sandwiches and soup. And then afterwards, I'll drive to the store, and I'll get your favorite snack?"

"Pretzels and chocolate?"

"Of course."

"Okay then." Ryan relented. "But you have to get oranges, too. You're all out."

Horatio let go of Ryan and told him to go lay down and rest. He would take care of dinner tonight. He thought Ryan deserved a little rest. He'd been on his feet all day and Horatio was sure he was a bit sore, even though he would never admit it. Ryan nodded. "Okay. I am feeling a little tired. Can we watch a movie when I wake up?"

"Sure, you can pick one out for us." Horatio told him. Ryan gave him a kiss on the lips, and made his way upstairs to the bedroom to rest. Horatio decided that he would wait an hour before he made dinner. That way, dinner would still be warm by the time he came downstairs to eat.

When the hour was up, Horatio went upstairs to the bedroom. He saw Ryan sprawled out on the bed, his legs spread out as far as they could go, his left arm was over his stomach and his right arm was above his head. Horatio smiled and approached him. He tapped Ryan a few times, whispering his name to wake him up. Ryan stirred but shook his head. He usually did that when he wanted to sleep longer.

"Ryan, you can't sleep too long. You'll be up all night." Horatio warned.

"It doesn't matter, I'm on leave anyways." Ryan answered, mumbling. "I'm tired."

"Baby, I made dinner. It's going to get cold if you don't eat it."

Ryan remained silent but he opened his eyes. He looked angry for being woken up. But the mention of food was enough to cheer him up. "Will you bring it to me?"

Horatio gave Ryan a kiss on the forehead and agreed. He made his way down the stairs and grabbed a tray. He carried the food up to find Ryan sitting upright on the bed. He was looking down, and Horatio thought that maybe Ryan was looking at his stomach, as he had grown fond of doing. But Horatio found the sight of what Ryan was looking at. He made a 'tsk' sound and shook his head, causing Ryan to look up at him with an annoyed face. "I'm leaking again."

"I told you to wear the pads. I have them in the bathroom."

"No, stop trying to make me wear them!" Ryan exclaimed. "I hate the pads. They make my nipples feel weird."

Horatio rolled his eyes and placed the tray on Ryan's lap. Ryan picked at his food angrily. He hated when Horatio told him to wear the pads. He dismissed them as 'not that bad' but that was only because he didn't have to wear them all day. Ryan did. And he hated it. He was mad at Horatio.

Horatio returned to the room with a wet cloth. He had a stern look on his face. "Take your shirt off." He told Ryan. He hesitated, because he was still so annoyed. But his shirt was starting to chafe. So, Ryan slowly slid his shirt off, as to not accidentally push the tray of food off his lap. Horatio sat on the bed, wiping around Ryan's nipple, which made Ryan squirm. "I can do it myself." Ryan said. He realized how harsh his tone sounded when Horatio shot him an annoyed look, so he changed it. "I mean, you don't have to do it."

"I know." Was Horatio's reply. He finished wiping and then looked at Ryan. His face looked so soft now, which was a better look than the angry and annoyed expression he'd gotten moments ago. The mood swings were no joke. Ryan could go from laughing hysterically, to tearing up because he didn't get his way. It was almost like dealing with a child.

"I'm sorry, Horatio." Ryan told him. Horatio nodded. He knew Ryan was sorry. And it was okay. He knew that Ryan wouldn't just snap on him- it was the hormones. "Where's your food?" Ryan asked him.

"I'm not too hungry now. I'm gonna go ahead to the store to pick up your snacks. Did you pick out a movie for us to watch?" He asked him. Ryan nodded. Horatio went to stand, but Ryan grabbed his arm. Horatio stopped his movement to look at Ryan, but the man had grabbed Horatio and pulled him close. Ryan crashed his lips against Horatio's harshly. Horatio out of instinct, kissed back just as feverishly. He only stopped when Ryan moaned into the kiss. Of course, when he pulled away, Ryan grew frustrated.

"Ryan, I have to go to the store before they close." Horatio explained. Ryan shook his head and pulled Horatio in again and continued to kiss him. Horatio kept pulling away, causing Ryan to keep bringing him back in. Eventually, Horatio gave in and took the tray off of his lap and down on the nightstand table beside the bed. When he did, he wasted no time in undressing Ryan and fucking him.

The food became cold and Ryan reheated it. Of course, he started craving his snacks but the store was closed and he didn't want Horatio to drive out farther to get him food. So, Ryan was moody again. But he eventually calmed down when Horatio gave him a bag of marshmallows.

"So, Stetler said he was bringing in someone to replace me indefinitely." Ryan said.

Horatio nodded. "I heard. I told him that it was unnecessary, since you'll be back. But I digress."

Ryan picked at a small marshmallow, making it even smaller. "Yeah, but, what if I don't come back?" He asked softly. "I mean, I am planning on coming back. But I'm just saying- what if I don't want to. What if I want to stay at home?"

Horatio eyed Ryan. "You want to be a stay-at-home parent?"

"Well, I don't know. Walter brought it up and I started thinking about it. I know I want to come back to work, but what if I later decide to stay home?" Ryan questioned.

Horatio seemed to be thinking. "I guess it would be your choice. If you want to come back to work- great. If you want to stay home with the baby- that's great, too. But I don't see you ever leaving us at the lab." Horatio frowned. "I am concerned, though; how often will I get to see our baby? Will I be a weekend dad?"

Ryan's eyes widened. "No, of course not! You can see our child anytime you want, Horatio."

"It's just, you live so far away. After you give birth, you're going to return back home with our baby." Horatio shrugged. "And I don't live with you. You don't live with me either."

Ryan smiled. "Well, then I'll just move in. Your place is bigger anyways." He chuckled, joking. But Horatio's face remained serious. "Why don't you?"

"What; move in?" Ryan asked.

"Yes."

Ryan popped a marshmallow into his mouth. "It's about time."

He smiled and Horatio did, too.


	24. All moved in

Twenty Four

Ryan rolled his eyes listening to Calleigh and Eric bicker. He had been hearing them argue for quite a while now. Horatio wasn't home yet, as he got called into work. But Calleigh and Eric were there. They were unloading things from the large truck out front and bringing them into Horatio's house. Or now, Horatio and Ryan's house.

Eric was telling Calleigh that the couch she was holding was going to slip because she wasn't holding it the right way. Calleigh told Eric she knew what she was doing and for him to 'back off'. This went on with practically each item they brought inside.

When they came back in, the moving company's workers came in, too. Ryan handed them all glasses of tea to drink. He tried to smile at Calleigh. "I appreciate your guys' help," he said. "Even though I told you that I had hired workers for this specifically and now I was practically paying them for not working. And then you called Eric anyways and told him to come help. But I appreciate it."

Calleigh smiled. "Hey, we did a hell of a lot better job than they would have. Come on, Ryan, when I got here these workers were just hanging out, out front smoking. They weren't doing anything." She shot each worker a look, because she knew she was right. Eric took a drink to cover his deep sigh.

Ryan noticed Eric glaring at something. Or someone. Before Ryan could say anything, Eric shot out of his chair. "Hey, what are you staring at?" He asked a worker.

The man shook his head. "Nothing."

"So, you weren't just staring at my friend?" Eric pointed at Ryan. "He's 8 months pregnant, man. You're either staring cuz you're a pervert, or your being a jerk. So which one is it?"

The guy continued to shake his head, but still apologized to Ryan. Though, Ryan hadn't even seen him staring. He was kind of used to it by now; being 8 months pregnant, and all. People stared a bit at him. But Ryan did like that Eric was sticking up for him. The workers remained silent, while Calleigh and Eric both laughed together about the awkwardness in the room now. This was probably the first time today Ryan had seen the two so much as crack a smile. He guessed that helping someone unpack brought out the worst in them.

After Ryan paid them and the workers left, he breathed out deeply and clenched his eyes shut.

Eric stared at Ryan with concern. "What's wrong?"

Calleigh observed him. "You okay, Ryan?"

He nodded. "Yeah, I just feel dizzy. And my back hurts a lot. I think I need to sit down."

Calleigh stood and took Ryan's hand and guided him to the couch and helped him sit down. Ryan leaned his head back against the couch and sighed. Eric came into the room, still sipping from his tea. "We can leave if you need us to. Just let us know, Wolfe."

Ryan shook his head. "No, no, I'll be fine. You guys can stay. Actually, I'd prefer if you stayed." Ryan told them. "I don't want to be alone."

Calleigh looked sympathetic and sat down next to Ryan. She put her arm around him. "It'll be alright, Ryan. Horatio should be home soon, right?"

"I don't know. He's been getting called in a lot to work and then when he tells me he'll be home, he suddenly has to work overtime."

Eric nodded. "Yeah, that happens unfortunately. But we're here. Well, Calleigh's here, actually, I have to go in to work today soon. Sorry. Maybe you can call Natalia to join you both?"

Calleigh's face lit up at that idea. "Yeah, that sounds like fun. What do you think, Ryan?" She asked. "We can just hang out here, maybe watch some movies? I can go pick up some snacks, too."

That did sound a lot better than being alone to him. Plus, Ryan really liked hanging out with Calleigh and Natalia. He was really glad to call them friends. "Yeah, that sounds good to me, actually. Can you call her, Calleigh?"

"Sure Ryan. I'll just walk Eric out first." Calleigh smiled. She stood and walked Eric out just as she said he would. She said thanks to him for coming to help out on short notice, and then she called Natalia. When Natalia heard about how miserable Ryan was, she said she would come over right away.

Ryan, Calleigh and Natalia sat in the living room eating popcorn and watching some girl movie Natalia had brought over. Ryan wanted to watch something with action- guns, explosions- that stuff. But Natalia told Ryan that his baby could hear everything and that it shouldn't hear things like that. So when Natalia popped her movie in, Ryan couldn't help but groan. "Who watches a movie about a _notebook_?" He complained.

Calleigh smiled. "You've never seen this before? It's actually pretty good."

Ryan shook his head. No he hadn't seen it, and he didn't want to either. Natalia laughed and promised Ryan that he would like it. He didn't think so.

When Horatio came through the door, he found Ryan cuddled up with a blanket on the couch, his eyes glued to the TV screen and his eyes looked red as if he'd been crying or tearing up. Natalia was sitting next to him, tears forming in her eyes. Calleigh sat on the floor leaning against the couch. She had no tears but she looked pretty into the movie, too. But she noticed Horatio. She smiled at him. "Hey Horatio. How long have you been there?"

"Not long." He told her, smiling. "Don't let me interrupt your movie."

Natalia shook her head and stood up. "Nah, it's about to go off anyways." Then, just as she said it, the screen faded black and the credits rolled. Natalia crossed the floor and turned the light on. Ryan didn't even look up. He still stared at the TV. "Why did you show me this? That was the most depressing thing I've ever seen!" He exclaimed.

Calleigh rolled her eyes. "It is sad, but it's a good movie." She stood too, and gave Ryan a hug. "I'm going to head home. Call me if you need anything." She told him. Ryan nodded, as he sniffled.

Natalia also gave Ryan a hug, and said goodbye to him. The two girls both gave Horatio a hug, too and they left. Horatio came and sat next to Ryan on the couch, placing a kiss to his cheek. "I see your stuff is here now. Are you excited?"

"Yeah." He answered dryly.

"Well, you don't seem excited."

"I just keep thinking about this movie." Ryan told him. He finally looked to him. "Hey, Horatio, did you know the baby can hear us? Do you think it hears us doing it?"

Horatio cracked a small smile. "Well, I've heard that before. I'm not sure. If our baby does hear us, he or she doesn't know what's happening anyways."

Ryan nodded. He seemed satisfied with that answer. He wiped his face with his hands and smiled at Horatio. "Have you finished the baby's room yet?"

"Almost." Horatio answered. "I have to finish setting up the crib. But Kyle's coming over tomorrow to help with that."

Horatio had been working on the baby's room for the last three weeks. It had to be a surprise to Ryan, so he couldn't help. Horatio knew the sex of the baby, but Ryan didn't. He wanted to find out in the delivery room. Since Horatio knew, he had been spending time decorating the room accordingly. Ryan couldn't even sneak a peek at the room because then it'd ruin the surprise.

"I still really want to see. The anticipation is killing me." Ryan sighed. "But I trust your judgement; you won't ruin the room. I mean, even if you did, I'd just redo it anyways."

Horatio wrapped his arms around Ryan. "Well thank you for having so much faith in me." He chuckled. "But trust me; you won't need to redo the room. It's almost perfection."


	25. Due Date

Twenty Five

Ryan just couldn't sleep. He was constantly tossing and turning, and huffing in frustration. No position was comfortable. The baby liked to kick, too. He was also extremely hungry but it seemed like no matter how much he ate, he just couldn't get full. And the constant getting up to use the bathroom because his baby was resting comfortably on his bladder was incredibly frustrating, too. Ryan was so miserable. And to top it off, Horatio was sound asleep in the bed next to him without a care in the world.

Bastard.

Ryan knew that Horatio needed to be up in the morning for work. But he couldn't help but to want him to wake up and be miserable with Ryan. And he knew that was probably selfish, but he hated being up alone. Ryan hated being alone period.

He sighed as he got out of bed for the umpteenth time that night. He quietly crept out of the room, and down the stairs and into the kitchen. Ryan glanced at the clock. It was only four o'clock in the morning. Horatio would be up in 3 hours but that wasn't soon enough. And he would have felt bad if he woke Horatio up just because he didn't want to be bored alone. Especially since Horatio needed to work. It just wasn't fair to him. But it also didn't seem fair to Ryan either.

Ryan opened the refrigerator and grabbed two oranges, a bottled water and then made his way into the living room. He turned the TV on, planted himself firmly on the couch, and instantly regretted not grabbing the bottle of chocolate sauce that Horatio had bought for him. He whined a bit because he wanted it, but Ryan didn't feel like getting up to get it.

He watched countless infomercials until Horatio came downstairs and found him sleeping on the couch. His mouth was wide opened and he snored loudly. Horatio laughed quietly and approached Ryan. He placed a few kisses to his forehead and cheek. Ryan abruptly stopped snoring and his eyes popped open. He stared at Horatio and then looked around. "Did I fall asleep?"

"I think you did." Horatio smiled. "But you should really sleep in the bed. You'll back will hurt even more if you don't."

Ryan shook his head. "I don't want to move. The baby hasn't kicked in hours now and I'm afraid if I move, it will start again."

"Oh, you poor thing. Just lay down in bed and try to get some sleep." Horatio answered. "It's a half-day at work for me anyways; I just have some meetings. But I'll be right home after okay? And we can just hang out together."

Ryan smiled. "I like that. Okay go in, so you can hurry back. And I'm going to bed."

Horatio helped Ryan up and off of the couch. He then guided him up the stairs back into their shared bedroom and helped him lay down. Then, Ryan placed a very passionate kiss on Horatio's lips before he left. Horatio left in a very great and positive mood. Hopefully the meetings wouldn't take too long and he could hurry home to Ryan.

When Horatio got to the lab, he wasn't surprised to see Dave there. He was already told that he would be rejoining the day team. And Horatio had no problem with that. He gave Dave a very cordial hello and went past him to his office. He had a stack of resumes from potential applicants on his desk that he needed to go through. He also had to interview a few people today. Then after, there was a team meeting.

After interviewing ten applicants, Horatio needed a break. He stepped outside in the peaceful, fresh air and breathed in and out deeply. Horatio was ready to go home and just relax, spending the day with Ryan to prepare for their babies arrival.

Initially, Horatio had been scared of having a baby- terrified, even. But he didn't let it show. He saw how freaked out yet happy Ryan was. He didn't want to make him lean toward being more afraid because of Horatio's reaction. So he put on a brave face and told Ryan that he would be there for him and their child. And of course, he meant it. And for weeks, Horatio was constantly worried about it.

He was too old to be having kids, he thought. And he had very little experience in taking care of babies and toddlers. He had been involved in Ray Jr's life, but not by a lot, or as much as he would have liked to be anyways. And Horatio hadn't been there for Kyle growing up. Not by his own choice though; in Horatio's defense, he had no idea Kyle even existed. The point being, Horatio had no idea how to raise a child. But Ryan didn't really either, not since a teen. He said he used to babysit for the neighborhood families but other than that, nothing. So, they were to experience it together. The thought of that both made Horatio excited but anxious at the same time.

But Horatio was happy. He liked the thought of having a little one running around the house.

His peace didn't last long when he breathed in the obnoxious scent of body spray and mints. He frowned and his face scrunched up. "What do you want?"

Rick Stetler glared and laughed mockingly at him. "Excuse me for wanting to step outside for a moment. I wasn't aware you owned the outdoors."

"I 'own' the outdoors?" Horatio sneered. "I wasn't aware we were back in middle school."

Rick just shook his head. He decided not to stand next to Horatio. Instead, he stood on the opposite side with his back facing him.

"Have you found anyone to replace Ryan?" Horatio heard Rick say. He didn't even bother to look at the man.

"I've interviewed a few people, yes. None as good as him, but I suppose I can find someone that will do." Horatio answered.

"You and Ryan are pretty close, right?" Rick questioned. "Do you know if he's going to be coming back to work or not? If he's not, you should probably hire someone who's capable and not someone that will 'do', as you put it."

Horatio almost rolled his eyes. "I know that he wants to come back to work. But things change and so do people. I wouldn't hire someone I didn't deem capable, Rick."

Rick snorted and turned to face Horatio again. "I didn't say you would, Horatio. I'm just saying. Better to be safe than sorry."

They didn't say much of anything else. Rick asked Horatio if he knew who the other father of Ryan's baby was. Horatio said it wasn't his business while Rick questioned why everyone was being so secretive about it. He just didn't see what the big deal was. He just simply didn't even know that Ryan was seeing someone. Most people had no problem letting that information out.

Calleigh opened the door, and looked around. She spotted Horatio and ran over to him. "Horatio, there's an emergency."

"He can't go out on a call, Ms. Duquesne." Rick informed her, though she wasn't speaking to him. "We have a meeting in a few minutes."

"This doesn't concern you." Calleigh told him. She approached the lieutenant. "Ryan just called me; he said he's been trying to call you for a while now."

Horatio nodded. "My phone is in my office. What's wrong? Is he okay?"

Calleigh answered yes immediately, as to not scare him. She glanced back to Rick, who was staring openly at them; listening to their conversation. She dropped her voice down to a whisper. "Yeah he's fine. But um, you might want to go meet him at the hospital."

"The hospital? As in…?"

"Yes. As in 'go now'. Like, right now."

"He didn't drive himself did he?" Horatio questioned.

"No, no. Just go, I'm sure he'll explain it to you." Calleigh told him. "I'll meet you guys up there later."

Horatio agreed and started making his way back inside the building to grab his phone before he left. But then he remembered he was supposed to be going to a meeting. What would he tell Rick is his reason for just taking off the way he was?

Calleigh had already reentered the building, and she was holding the door open for Horatio, waiting for him. Horatio looked back to Rick but he wasn't sure exactly what to say. "Rick, I have to-."

"Just go, Horatio." Rick said.

He didn't need to be told twice. Horatio bolted for the door past Calleigh. He jogged down the halls of the lab and into his office. Walter, Valera, Natalia and a few others watched as he did so, probably wondering what was going on unless Calleigh had already told them. He grabbed his phone, placed it in his pocket, and collected the rest of his things. After Horatio was sure he had everything he needed, he left the building, saying bye to Calleigh and passing Rick as he made his way back up to IAB. Horatio got into his car and was off.

He made it to the hospital in just under 20 minutes. When he went inside, he spoke to the receptionist who guided him to the maternity ward of the hospital. He saw Alexx, when he got into the elevator, she slipped in with him.

"Horatio, Ryan's not quite ready to have the baby. They say it'll be about another 2 or 3 hours." She told him. "I've been going back and forth since I'm not a maternity nurse. But I should warn you- he's a bit testy right now. Actually, Eric brought him in and had to leave because he was getting a bit annoyed with Ryan."

"That's understandable." Horatio told her.

Alexx shook her head and grinned. "Good luck."

Horatio and her both stepped off the elevator and walked down the hall together. They made it to Ryan's room and peered inside. There was a nurse in there, talking to the other pregnant couple in the room. Their curtain was open, while Ryan's was shut. Alexx put her hand out, silently telling Horatio to stay where he was. She pulled back Ryan's curtain and she smiled. Now Horatio couldn't see Ryan, but he was sure that he was making a face since Alexx's smile went away instantly.

"How are you feeling, baby?"

"I feel like my stomach is going to explode. This is literally the worst feeling in the world." Horatio heard Ryan snap. "But other than that, I'm just freaking great."

"I'm sorry, they can't give you the epidural yet, because-."

"Okay, where the hell is Horatio?" He interrupted her.

Alexx shot the redhead a look, and he came over and opened up the curtain all the way. Ryan lay on the hospital bed dressed in a gown. He had a scowl on his face that Horatio hadn't quite seen before. When Ryan laid eyes on Horatio, it got worse.

" _You_!" He exclaimed. "You did this to me. This is all your fault."

Horatio shook his head. "If I recall correctly- and I do, by the way- you were the one who insisted it would be fine if we didn't use a condom."

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Details that aren't important! This is still your fault. And you weren't even there when my water broke. Poor Eric- he came over to bring some stuff for the baby that he bought and my water broke. He had to rush me to the hospital."

"Where is Eric?"

"He left to get food. He said I was 'too angry'." Ryan sighed. "I don't care."

Alexx covered her mouth to suppress her chuckle as she exited the room. Horatio almost envied her. If he tried to leave, Ryan would have his head.


	26. End

Twenty Six

Ryan wasn't a fan of making eye-contact during intimate moments. It made him feel so awkward and vulnerable, and just so exposed. But Horatio seemed to like it. He seemed to like it a lot, actually.

Who knew Horatio had this kink? In the last year that the two had been together, Ryan hadn't experienced this before.

Horatio had taken their daughter, Alana, with him to see Eric and to visit Marisol, as she hadn't properly introduced to her yet. He'd been gone for an hour and a half, and Ryan had to admit, he loved having alone time.

Now, he absolutely adored their daughter. She was Ryan's lovebug. But she was only 5 months old and all she did was blabber, laugh and cry all day long. Usually in that order, too. And Ryan was a patient man, he liked to think, but sometimes he just needed a little break. Even if it was just a couple of hours, he needed it.

Since he hadn't been working, he was usually home alone all day with Alana. Well, taking care of a baby was work to him. Horatio would come home from the lab and would immediately lay down to relax. Well, Ryan wanted to relax sometimes, too. So when Horatio skeptically asked Ryan how he felt if he had taken Alana to see Marisol for a couple of hours, Ryan couldn't say yes fast enough.

He hadn't been home alone in a while now, so he had no idea what to do. Cleaning was useless, as he did that every single day already. Watching TV was fun for maybe ten minutes, but then his mind started to wander. It had been a while since he and Horatio had sex. How long has it been; 3 months now?

So, Ryan opened up a little shoebox that he kept in the bedside table. He reached into it, pulled out a bottle of lube, and his silver vibrator that he had bought himself as a birthday present. He deserved it, he thought. Ryan took his clothes off, lay back on the bed, and then coated the object with the lube. He wasted no time, not even to finger himself first. He just wanted to feel the slight burn of it. What he hadn't expected though, was for Horatio to come in while he was fucking himself.

Ryan was shocked and just froze. He hadn't heard Horatio come home; he was too into himself. He was just glad Horatio hadn't came in holding their daughter. Granted she was too young to know what was going on, but it still would be awkward. But Horatio shut the door, smirked and told Ryan to continue. He had told him, that Alana had fallen asleep on the way back and she was in her crib now. So, they had the time. Ryan almost didn't want to; it just felt embarrassing. But the vibrator was still pulsing inside of him and he desperately wanted it to move. So he did as he was told and continued.

"What did I say about closing your eyes?" Horatio warned softly. "Open them; look at me."

Ryan hadn't even realized he had closed his eyes. He opened them again and looked at Horatio. The man was staring so intently at him, biting his lip as he watched Ryan pleasure himself. Ryan could see clearly how aroused Horatio was, and while it did feel awkward, it still made him feel even more turned on. He was moaning as softly as he could, as name's bedroom was right next to their and he didn't want to wake her up. Horatio had moved from his spot from across the room leaning on the dresser drawers, to sitting on the bed. They maintained eye contact, and Horatio reached out and touched Ryan's cock. He groaned and closed his eyes again.

He felt a light smack to his chest.

"Eyes open, Ryan."

He opened his eyes again and stared at Horatio. He had taken his hands off of Ryan, and started taking off his own shirt and unbuttoning his pants. Ryan kept his eyes trained on Horatio, as he was told to. When he was fully undressed, Horatio positioned himself so that his cock was in Ryan's face. Ryan, of course, wasted no time in opening his mouth up and taking him in.

Ryan continued to thrust the vibrator, while Horatio thrust inside his mouth. He would hit the back of Ryan's throat every so often, but Ryan didn't mind it. He liked it. Horatio gripped Ryan by his hair on the back of his head, and pushed so that the man was gagging on his. Ryan had stilled his movement, no longer holding onto the vibrator. He moaned around Horatio's cock, sending vibrations and shivers through the other man. Horatio released the back of his head, and almost asked why Ryan had stopped; afraid that he had pushed too far and had hurt him. But he saw why.

"You came?" He questioned. "You weren't even touching yourself."

Ryan nodded, and wiped the saliva from his mouth. Then, he pulled Horatio closer and took him in his mouth again. Horatio moaned as he grabbed on Ryan's shoulder that time. He continued to suck Horatio off until he came. Afterwards, they cleaned up and Ryan went to go check on Alana. She was still sleeping, so he went downstairs to get started on dinner. But Horatio came down after him and stopped him.

"You've been doing a lot of work lately." He told him. "Why don't you go relax and watch TV or something; I'll take care of dinner tonight."

Ryan nodded and smiled "Okay. Thanks Horatio."

After Alana woke up, Ryan brought her downstairs. He held her while Horatio finished up with dinner. She had started blabbering and making other baby noises, making Ryan smile a bit. He looked down to the little girl. "I swear you and Horatio have the same eyes."

"What was that?" Horatio asked, coming into the room. "Dinner will be ready shortly."

"Okay. And I said she has your eyes. It's not fair. I wanted her to have my eyes. Don't get me wrong, I like your eyes and all, but it would have been nice if she had some features of mine. She even has little red hairs." Ryan huffed.

Horatio chuckled. "Well, she's certainly stubborn. So you both have the same attitude."

"Ha-ha, very funny."

"Well, maybe the next one will be the spitting image of you."

Ryan's eyes widened. "Next one? There's going to be another one? Oh no, I don't think my body can handle that. And my hormones were so crazy. And the nipple chaffing." He shuddered. "No way. I love you, Horatio, and I love Alana- but I can't do that again."

Horatio rubbed Ryan's arm comfortingly. "People always say that and then they end up wanting another baby. Don't worry, I don't mean anytime soon. We could probably wait a couple years. And I'll be by your side; just like I was before."

Ryan shook his head and looked at his daughter. "Well what do you think, Alana? Do you want to have a little brother or sister?"

Horatio smiled. "Of course she does. We'll be one big happy family. I know Kyle loves having a little sister. She will love being a big sister."

"Maybe you're right. I'll think about it okay?" He answered.

"You hear that, Alana?" Horatio asked. "You might be a big sister one day. Isn't that great? I love you, Alana."

"And she loves you too."

"And I love you, Ryan."

Ryan smiled and kissed Horatio.

"And I love you too, Horatio."

_The end!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Their daughter is named Alana because of Alana de La Garza, who played Marisol.
> 
> Part Two Here:  
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/7450555


End file.
